Don’t feel ready to go back to work

[Woomba]

I had an ectopic pregnancy that ruptured and I needed emergency surgery just over a week ago. I am recovering well physically and I WFH. I feel I should be ready to go back to work now. But I’m just not. I keep crying over nothing and I can’t concentrate long enough to read a page of a book. I don’t know why I feel so emotionally raw still but I do. It all came as such a shock. Would I be being unreasonable to take a bit more time? Even though physically I’m doing well?

First of all, so sorry about your ectopic pregnancy. It sounds like you've been through a tough time.
If you need to take more time off, then take it. There's no right or wrong timescale to these things, and it'll take time for you to recover emotionally as well as physically.
I had a missed miscarriage a couple of years ago and I was off work for about 3 weeks I think. The last week was so I could recover a bit emotionally before going back to work. Even then, I got counselling through my work's occupational health service.

Don't go back to work until YOU feel ready to.

All the best 🌺

I echo what @KeepSmiling89 has said. Don't compare as everyone is different. Focus on you and what you need. I have had 3 weeks off now due to a missed miscarriage and am going back to work on a phased return next week.

I doubt you'd have any trouble getting a GP to sign you off for another week or so. You've had surgery so are having physical problems and, obviously, strong emotional responses too. It's such a shit thing I'm really sorry this has happened to you.

I'm so sorry you are going through this! If you aren't ready to go back then get your gp to sign you off. Everyone is different and there is no set amount of time each person needs to be ready.
I have had 2 missed miscarriages, the first one I was back at work the day after my erpc, the 2nd one I was off for 5 weeks. Listen to your own body and take the time you need. X

Please please please take as long as you need - I had a miscarriage end of 22 and didn't take any time off work because I couldn't face talking to my boss about it, it was only as time went on I realised how much it had affected me emotionally and I was a mess for a very long time. I subsequently went on to have another last year, albeit, I did take a week off that time as I just could not face going into work.

I'm well into the third trimester of a current pregnant and I still get really upset thinking about those 2 miscarriages now, it really does take time and no one can or should tell you how long you need to come to terms with what has happened and how you will feel.

Take all the time you need. I was off for about 2 months. It took a while for me to miscarry. In the end needed a operation. And still needed a bit more time off after the op. Sorry for your loss x

Thank you. It was an unplanned pregnancy that I didn’t know about until it ruptured and I ended up in hospital. I feel like I don’t have a right to be as upset as I am. It’s just a confusing emotionally messy time.

You have every right to feel upset about it! It's a traumatic experience for anyone, planned or unplanned. The fact that it was unplanned means you'll need even more time to process what's just happened.

Be kind to yourself 🌺