11 weeks and have been told to expect the worst

[NotALotGoingOnAtTheMoment]

Hi all, I’m really new here and haven’t posted on here before so please bare with me if I’m missing any rules or anything.

May last year I found out I was pregnant with my first baby, we quickly found out at 6.5 weeks that it was ectopic, I had to have surgery which also meant the removal of my left fallopian tube. In August last year I found out I was pregnant again but miscarried at 5.5 weeks.

Now to today, I am currently 11 weeks pregnant and have been closely monitored by the hospital and had scans every two weeks. Two weeks ago I was measuring 5w5d pregnant when I should have been 9 weeks, however they did see a strong heartbeat. I went back yesterday and they told me that the heartbeat was really weak and I’m measuring only 6 weeks pregnant when I should be 11. The sonographer and her second opinion have both told me to expect to miscarry. They have asked me to go back next Thursday for another scan and they’ve said they’re confident the heartbeat will have stopped.

I’m certain of my dates as I track ovulation however I could be out by 1 week due to PCOS. I got a positive test on 26th June so I am definitely 10 weeks at least.

Not sure why I’m positing this, just needed to share. I can’t believe this is happening again. Has anyone else experienced this?

Thank you! No change here and every time I go to the loo I’m almost disappointed to continue in this limbo phase but also relieved. What a strange time.

I’ve read it comes in waves for many women but that does make living anything similar to a normal life very hard! Are you off work at the mo?

I totally feel that, the limbo part is so difficult and I feel like I’m struggling to get out of it! Yeah I’m off, the hospital have signed me off for two weeks, I’m not sure how long I’ll need though as it’s hit me hard. Are you off too?

I went back today after taking last week off. It was OK but I’ve told my manager I’m not up for presenting or more challenging discussions. I don’t feel like I can put a sentence together!

I’m not sure what I’ll do when the physical side starts or happens but my work place is really supportive. I might just say I have Covid to other colleagues and wfh gently.

Today’s scan showed no heartbeat and strangely measured smaller than last week. I’m feeling a little relieved that it’s certain now and I’ve been referred to the early preg unit to have surgical miscarriage management.

How are you getting on @NotALotGoingOnAtTheMoment ?

Hey I’m so sorry for your loss, I know it was expected at this point but I know it doesn’t make it any easier. I’m glad you have your closure now.

I’m ok thanks, still on and off spotting with small clots but nothing substantial at all it’s not even like a light period.

Do you mind me asking did they give you the option or did they say surgical was the best route? Just wondering what’s in store for me on Thursday. Thanks for updating me I’ve been checking in all morning hoping to hear.

@NotALotGoingOnAtTheMoment the waiting game is horrible. Both times for my MMCs I was offered 3 options - expectant management (for 7-14 days), medical or surgical and they explained pros and cons of all of them. I chose surgical both times x

This is a lovely story (or at least the end is).
Good luck OP. Not a nice situation to be in.

Thank you. Talking to you has really helped me this week.

I’m doing ok but have been in a strange mood all day. Mostly angry which is not like me.

They said I have three options, ‘natural’, medicated or surgical. I had a termination years ago and took medication but I had complications then needed surgical a month later anyway which went really smoothly & I felt myself just a few days later. I’m a bit of a wimp tbh and if there’s a relatively pain free option… I’ll take it! x

Are you still happy with those decisions? I’m 99% sure about surgical but if I can’t get an appt for a week I might change my mind.

100%. I didn't want any more waiting to see what happened and I didn't want to take medication and deal with it all at home. A clinical setting felt best for me to be able to draw a line under it and start recovering physically and mentally. The general anaesthetic wasn't an issue either as I'd already had a couple of other surgeries under general x

ah thank you, that’s reassuring. I like the idea of it being more clinical & less emotional.

Thanks so much for this. It’s really helped me talking to you too and I’m glad I’ve helped you!

I have my scan tomorrow, it’s been 3 days of light spotting but part of me is wondering if that’s withdrawal from the progesterone! I think I’ll be going for medical management as I had surgery for an ectopic last year and while it went well it was quite traumatic for me the whole situation (found out it was ectopic and has emergency surgery) so I’d rather spend as little time in that hospital as possible!!

Hospital confirmed what we already knew and I’ve started the medical management process (one tablet today and then four on Saturday) so grateful for this thread the last week. Thank you 💖

Ah how did you find the appt @NotALotGoingOnAtTheMoment ?

We spent all morning in our NHS hospital being rescanned, blood tests and then booked in for surgical in 2 weeks. I guess it might happen in between but I hope not.

Our apt was at 8 and we left just before 11 so we were there quite a while. We had the same sonographer as last week which was good and she scanned me and confirmed! I was then left in a quiet room while we waited for the nurse practitioner who was so lovely, she sat and spoke to me for a good amount of time and went over our options. She sent me away with my medication, painkillers and even gave me sanitary towels and sheets so I didn’t need to go shopping. It’s good to have the closure but I am devastated and scared as she did tell me the medication could be painful but she told me what to do in case of emergency and she was really thorough! She also gave me a good amount of codine too!

how are you feeling today?

I’m feeling exhausted tbh. I just want to sleep until it’s all over but slapping on a smile for work. Being productive does make me feel more me.

When I took the medication for my termination years ago, it was far ‘better’ than I expected. I felt almost waves of movement then would go to the loo and pass blood or clots. I had cramps and felt light headed but it was over between 5-10pm. My only complication was I kept bleeding a little bit for a few weeks & had positive preg tests so had to go back in for a D&C. It might be TMI but the pain from constipation from the codeine was worse than the cramps on the night.