4th miscarriage

[Ttcafterlosses]

99% sure I’m currently having my fourth miscarriage in a row. I’m under the care of the recurrent loss clinic and on progesterone and aspirin. I thought this time would be different , trying medication, I thought that was it and I was ‘cured.’ It’s the same cramps the same backache the same spotting that’s getting heavier. I feel like I’m suffocating I don’t know how to go on and pretend everything is okay.m to the outside world

sending a handhold. I don't have any useful advise but don't pretend you're ok when you are going through such a difficult time 💐

I'm thinking of you, you just take it a minute at a time. It's so hard when you know the symptoms, it is a waiting game for a while. Don't forget, the Samaritan is always there to talk to, about all sorts of things. Virtual hand hold from me, you are never alone Xx

Hi, I just made my own post a few hours ago. Our situations are different as although I’ve just suffered a 4th loss also, I have been lucky to have two children in the midst of them all. I literally said to my husband earlier it feels like I’m suffocating. I understand the feeling of heaviness in your chest so well. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Have you had any testing done? I’m waiting to start the process even though I think we are done with trying, but I’m thinking if there’s a chance of getting answers it’s worth it.

Thinking of you.

It's shit OP. I'm sorry you're going through it. I had 6 MC in total. We made the conscious decision to stop trying as it mentally was breaking me. I'm now mid forties and have finally accepted that we're childless.
You will get through it, but from my own experience of having a decade of TTC , you will know in yourself if you can cope or not to keep going on trying. Personally, after 10 years I knew I couldn't cope keep going through it.
Stay strong, don't feel you need to pretend you're ok. I didn't talk to many people about my first few MCs, but then I thought sod it! Why should I pretend I'm ok? So I started talking about it and was surprised to discover how many people had also suffered infertility issues.
Look after yourself x

Hi all thank you so much for your kind words. I read all your responses yesterday and they were comforting but I wasn’t in any state of mind to respond. We have psychological support available through the recurrent loss clinic so I think I will reach out to them too. I am working today so having to put on a brave face but luckily working from home. I have spoken to my the midwives today and they’re going to do my bloods and scan this week. They want me to keep taking progesterone just in case but acknowledged that this could be delaying the miscarriage bleed so unfortunately it’s a waiting game. They are amazing so my husband and I feel lucky they to be under their care again following my last miscarriage where I was hospitalised and went back and forth but lost baby in the end

timetolive I am so sorry you’ve had such a difficult journey and struggled for so many years with this outcome. It’s something people don’t talk about and I feel like it’s a taboo subject. I feel like people don’t realise the amount of grief that comes with miscarriages but every loss is a huge loss and needs to be grieved. My consultant spoke to me about the PTSD associated with losses and has written articles about how more needs to be done to support women and their partners through miscarriages. I am so grateful for the support I have in my consultant and EPU but it’s taken many losses to get that support.

Lexaline I am sorry you’re going through something similar. The suffocating feeling - there’s no other way to describe it and it’s awful. I began getting testing done after my third consecutive loss I am under the care of Professor Quenby. She’s identified a few things, issues with my cycle hence the progesterone, borderline APS hence the aspirin. It seems a lot of it is trial and error and to look at and try different things based on blood tests and history, for example she wants me to try progesterone for 3 months to improve my cycles and then will review and try something else. I thought the answers would be clear cut e.g this is what’s wrong and this is how we fix it but I think there are so many factors involved it’s not that simple

Wanted to update this thread. My bleed wasn’t a miscarriage. I had a perfectly healthy baby with heartbeat at 6 weeks. Went for my 8 week reassurance scan and found out baby’s heartbeat had stopped which was a shock. No bleeding or anything after the 6 week scan. I had medical management today reluctantly as nothing was happening and my body was holding on to baby - absolutely devastated.

so sorry for your loss op.
have they found the reason for the misscarriages?

Thank you. Prior to this pregnancy my consultant thought it could be low progesterone but I was on progesterone from day 21 of my cycle and increased the dose at BFP so it can’t be that

I was asked to collect the baby for genetic testing but horrifically it fell into the toilet and I couldn’t get it out the toilet as it was attached to a large placenta and I used an object to try to fish it out which I shouldn’t have done as it damaged baby so ended up flushing it away which is haunting me. I feel terrible and should have used my hand I was just so terrified and shaken up it looked a lot more like a baby than I expected it to.

I have been booked in for a follow up appointment with my consultant in October. I think the next steps are private nk cell testing and/or an endometrial scratch procedure which I would also need to do privately. Not sure if I can carry on with the process the grief is all consuming

i can imagine it must be so hard. i agree happening fourth time is heart breaking. i wonder if there is any support out there to help you emotionally.
i hope the October appts will be helpful.
i read another thread too about a miscarriage yesterday. in fact it looks quite common. reading them may help you a bit hopefully.
my thoughts are with you.

I know this is an old post and I'm sorry if commenting brings up traumatic things for you, I'm currently waiting for my 4th miscarriage this year to be confirmed and found this thred.
How are you? Did you ever get any answers about your recurrent miscarriages?

Hi, not at all, so sorry to hear about your losses, are you part of the recurrent miscarriage clinic? I am happy to help anyone going through horrible recurrent miscarriages.

This pregnancy did progress further than any others, however I had a missed miscarriage in the end. I had a strong heartbeat which gave me hope and then went for another scan and there was no heartbeat. Honestly can’t even begin to describe the pain. Again unexplained. Haven’t fallen pregnant since.

A few months later had an endometrial biopsy at Coventry which got infected and I developed an infection in my womb which developed into sepsis. After recovery I was told that the results of my biopsy indicated that my endometrial lining didn’t provide a great environment and I was told to trial sitagliptin for 3 months and began to TTC again at the end of Feb.

I haven’t managed to fall pregnant since and don’t really have many answers, hoping that the sitagliptin helps me like it has helped others. I also saw another consultant privately who recommended that I get my AMH tested and I am currently waiting for those results.

The only thing I have left to try are IVF and/or going down the immune route with Professor Shehata but I live nowhere near London and I am scared IVF won’t help and will lead to more heartbreak and both treatments are very costly and more than that I think I’m actually terrified of falling pregnant again even though I have started TTC again it’s quite half heartedly, part of me has decided it’s never going to happen for me - maybe a coping mechanism I suppose.

Hope we get our answers and rainbows. The Tommy’s midwives supported me so well - I hope you are in touch with them? X