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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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Ectopic pregnancy

3 replies

Notaregularmum30 · 03/07/2023 14:17

Hi, (sorry it’s long)
not sure why I’m writing on here or What to expect but I wanted to share my experience as when I was pregnant and concerned no one had the same things happening so might help someone.
Also feeling quite alone so would be nice to talk to people who can relate.

So I was one day late for my period (wasn’t try but wasn’t preventing pregnancy wanted to see what happens, both happy)
I did a pregnancy test it was positive but super faint line. Just thought maybe it was too soon. I had done a digital 2 days later and said “not pregnant” so I thought maybe it’s too early or not sticking. I did so many test all super faint in the space of a week. Had spotting every time I had sex or even if when I did BM. But just spotting not much ranging from brown to pink never in my pants just when wiping.
I went to gp with my concerns (5weeks pregnant) and did a pregnancy test there and it was negative. But I knew I was pregnant but something not right. (Gut feeling) my boobs were really sore and I had mild nausea on n off. Did another digital clear blue 2 days later and that said pregnant 1-2 weeks
I was going away and still concerned as I was spotting still after sex so wanted to get checked again. So 6+2 weeks pregnant saw gp cervix closed everything looked fine did swabs to check everything. I also did another pg test which came back as two very dark lines.
I go away the following day (10 day holiday abroad)
Everything is fine I feel reassured by gp spoken to midwife she said this can happen sometimes just keep an eye on it. When we had sex still spotting ranging from brown to light red. Sex did hurt so thought I was more sensitive than usual.
5 days later I go to the toilet and there’s red blood, very upset because I think I’m starting to miscarry. Achy back and pelvis not bleeding a lot no clots but more than spotting. Continued on n off throughout the day and my pregnancy symptoms went. So I thought I was losing my baby. Spent the next day in bed upset and achy cramps more on the one side not excruciating and still not bleeding a lot but more than spotting. It was red. (I never filled a pad) also the consistency was more watery than a period.
Come the following (Thursday)day feel ok just sad and spotting brown and sometimes a watery red/orange blood when wiping. On Friday I feel ok, just really achy back and right side not in loads of pain just uncomfortable. Friday night the pain gets worse n worse where I’m contemplating going to hospital. Pain right side of pelvis, right side lower back, down my right leg and stabbing pains up my bum. Coming in waves like contractions, building up getting worse. Sudden urge for a BM which was loose. Eventually the pain slowed down and I fell asleep. Saturday felt achy not in loads of pain still spotting and it’s watery and light red to brown colour. Sunday feel fine, no pain and no blood. Fly home early Monday so make a gp appointment so I can be seen by EPU on the way there pain starts again all on the right side again and down my right leg. Bleeding starts again red blood.

I get admitted to hospital so they can do further test and blood test and stay over night to be monitored.
Next day an external scan shows nothing no sign of pregnancy but test coming back positive. Do an internal scan and they see that the baby is in my right fallopian tube 😢. I have surgery the next day. Right fallopian tube removed.

Feeling very emotional almost 2 weeks after surgery and feeling lonely.
when did everyone feel ok? Emotionally and physically? Also I’ve not bleed after surgery at all? Is this normal? When did everyone cycles return?
when did you all get back to normal activities?
sorry it’s long. I felt like I needed to get it all out and speak about it.

OP posts:
Reachingout34 · 04/07/2023 15:30

Hey @Notaregularmum30

I’m so sorry for what you’ve been through. And that you put that out there and haven’t had a reply yet.

I just searched ectopic on mumsnet because I am going through the same thing. 1 week ago today I went in for a scan at 6 weeks and 5 days and I had a pregnancy in my left tube. The background is I had had left sided pain and spotting a week prior and they couldn’t find anything at all and told me to call back if I was still pregnant on pregnancy test in a week. I wish I hadn’t waited as long as they said but oh well. I went for surgery that day and they removed the tube.

recovery has been really hard. I had so much pain and bleeding over the weekend. I have bouts of crying and just feeling so sad about what was lost. It’s so unfair. I’m 34 and I’ve wanted this for so long.

I don’t think it’s too worrying you haven’t had bleeding - I was actually worried that I had bleeding because I was told to expect a period in 3-6 weeks. But if you would like to speak to someone why don’t you call your EPAU and you can ask the nurses? I think peoples bleeding patterns after it might really differ, but the EPU team should be experts on that.

in terms of emotional and physical recovery I don’t know either. I do not feel in the least recovered emotionally even if I feel a bit better physically. I am holed up in bed like I’m sick! A big part of me actually doesn’t want to move on, if that makes sense?

I really hope you find some comfort and that things get better. I think they are likely to. I’ve read so many stories of people conceiving soon after and I’m sure it will happen for us.

sending you a hug xxx

Notaregularmum30 · 11/07/2023 15:52

Hi @Reachingout34
thank you for replying. First time I’ve written anything on here.
Im so sorry to hear about what happened. It’s difficult and it hurts sending you lots of love.
it’s one of those things you just think will never happen to you.
thank you for your kind words.
I have started bleeding now 2 and half weeks later it started not sure if it’s due to my hormone levels dropping or if it’s a period but im seeing a doctor in the morning to check my scars and discuss other bits so I’ll ask then.
how are you doing? How are you coping?
yeah that makes sense I feel like I just want to be in bed and it’s been almost 3 weeks. Some days I feel ok which I’ll feel guilty about and other days I just want to cry. Im sure as time goes by it will get easier.
from everything I read fertility doesn’t decrease that much so I have hope you’ll catch again when you’re ready.
here if you ever want to chat. Sending you a big hug xxx

OP posts:
Reachingout34 · 13/07/2023 10:19

Hi @Notaregularmum30

how did the doctors appointment go? I hope it went well. I’ve been slightly worried about my belly button because it’s got a lot of glue/scab in it and I’m inpatient for that to go away so I can have my body back at least slightly closer to how it was before.

it’s good you’ve had a bleed I think - what did they say re it being period or not? I think it will just take some time for our bodies to regulate in terms of cycle.

im back at work this week - I work part time. It’s actually been nice and I’ve told a few colleagues who have been lovely. I still cry every day but for less long now. I’ve started keeping a journal which helps.

im still so sad but part of me has started getting excited about trying again. It’s good to have hope, and like you say, fertility not massively affected which is amazing.

I hope you’re doing well in this really hard time. Sending hugs. Look after yourself xxx

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