Mmc advice

[Niamhyc]

Hi there,

Recently found out at 12 weeks that I've miscarried. I was told the baby stopped developing at 6 weeks and 5 days. I'm booked in for D and C for Friday but have started cramping so feel like it will happen before that and tbh I'm petrified about it. Just wondering, if the baby stopped at 6.5 weeks, will the placenta and sac still have developed? Therefore be bigger and harder to pass? Or will they both have stopped at 6.5 weeks aswell? Think I have read too many horror stories of miscarriage at 12weeks and have absolutely terrified myself to the point that I'm afraid to pee and wipe incase I see something on the tissue so haven't been wiping, just using the pad, which I'm sure isn't helping as I feel like there's blood gathered now, sorry for the graphics! So much love for anyone going through this right now, its just the worst 💔

Sorry you’re going through this. I’ve miscarried many many times at various stages between 6 and 16 weeks. At 6.5 weeks there won’t be recognisable remains but just a blob that will probably get lost among the blood. you will cramp and feel pain though as the womb tries to get rid of everything. It just like a period really. Please don’t panic if this process starts, see it as your body resetting and caring for itself ready for you to try again when you feel ready to. You need to watch out for signs of infection or any heavy bleeding which is extremely unlikely at this stage. Use painkillers and indulge in comfort food.

@Ecoartistontour thank you so much and I'm so sorry to hear about your losses, I can't even imagine how difficult that's been 💔 especially at 16 weeks, that must have been so tough!
I know, I think I've read up too much to the point that I've terrified myself and the waiting around for it to happen doesn't help. Wish I could have gone in for the D and C sooner to get it all over with but I suppose if it happens before that, it happens! That's reassuring to know, that was my main concern, that I'd see something when wiping. And that's a really good way of looking at it, our bodies resetting! Have all the comfort food and trash TV so that's helping! But to be honest, this has probably helped more, just to hear from someone who's gone through it! Thank you so much ❤️❤️

you’ll be absolutely fine. It’s shocking and upsetting and particularly cruel when it’s a missed miscarriage because you’ve spent all this time thinking things were developing. But the fact that it did end quite early is good news in a way it means something was just not right with the fetus. Later losses can mean that there’s an issue with your body which are more troubling. You’ll feel better in a couple of weeks and after a couple of cycles you’ll perhaps try again?

just look after yourself and try not to be alone the whole time, you’re at risk of getting down with the news and hormones so have some one around for chatter and to share your treats with. Maybe plan a little trip away for in a few weeks time? I went on holiday after one traumatic loss. I came back pregnant and that baby now has two babies .

Sending you best wishes. You will get through it.

Don't be afraid to take the pain relief you need before you go nil by mouth. I downloaded some relaxing music onto my phone to take into hospital to play during the procedure.

When I got out of hospital after my D&C I went for a walk, had nice coffee and pastry at a lovely cafe, then home for a nap and enjoyed a rare steak and glass of wine in the evening.

Give your body and mind and heart time to heal. 1st week I was still teary. By the end of the 2nd week I was still sad but felt much more human.

@Ecoartistontour yes I actually feel a lot more reassured about the whole process now! And that's a good way of looking at it, that it's not necessarily an issue with my body! Yes, think I will give myself a break for a few cycles to heal emotionally and physically before trying again! Thankfully my partner works from home and his work have been very supportive so it's nice having someone in the house, just for peace of mind! A trip away is a great idea, and can maybe enjoy a cocktail or 2! That's amazing, what a lovely happy ending for you! Thank you so much for your support!!

@Whataretheodds thank you so much for this! Really reassuring to hear that you were able to do some nice things for yourself after the surgery, makes it less daunting! And a really nice idea to have something nice planned for afterwards! Yes I think once I get the physical side of things over with, I'll feel a little better! I only found out on Saturday so have still been a little teary this week, and can come on really suddenly! Thankfully my work have told me to take next week off too which is great! Can't wait to have that feeling of feeling human again, this is giving me hope! Thank you so much!