When will I feel (physically) better from MMC ?

[potentialmediator]

Hi, I had the medical management for my missed miscarriage on Friday (should have been 8wks pregnant.) Had the day off work for it, but cooked dinner for my DC's etc that eve, felt pretty wiped out though and barely got off sofa after that.

DH is working non stop so wasn't around all weekend, (own business) so I've had to be fairly functional since then, drive kids to activities, back at work yesterday etc.

I'm so drained. I can barely drag myself out of bed at 7.30, and I'm in a foul mood all the time. Had pretty bad cramps again Sunday night.
Anyway I'm sick of moping and just want to get back to normal. It's been 4 days so I feel I'm making a bit of a big deal of this now (only internally not to others!)
Not sure how much of this is that I physically feel crap and this is getting me down, or emotionally I'm somehow more upset than I realise and it's manifesting itself physically?!? Maybe a bit of both.

Anyway would just welcome anyone's experience. Just want to move forward I guess and give myself a kick up the bum, but maybe I need more patience. Thank you.

I’m so sorry for your loss OP. Everyone’s experience is completely different, so I’m not sure anyone can tell you exactly what’s ahead for you, but gosh, I think you’re being tough on yourself! There’s the blood loss, the massive hormone shift, and the emotional awfulness to deal with… It doesn’t sound like there’s a lot of flex in home life unfortunately, but could you take some time off work? I asked on this forum before my medical management and most people had at least a few days off, many had a week or two, and some up to a month. I had a week off and I think I could usefully have taken more. I was shaky (anaemic), exhausted, and emotionally drained.

Thanks so much for your message, I really appreciate it. I’m so sorry for your loss too.

I’m not sure why I’m trying to minimise it as I am very sad. And tend to anaemia as it is without this!
I guess I feel unless i’m agony or with a high temp I should just get on with stuff, but it’s really helpful to know others allowed a decent amount of time. Wish I had booked this in advance but I kind of rushed it all, wanting to get over asap. Hated the half pregnant feeling when I knew it wasn’t viable.
Anyway thanks for your kind words and hope you’ve had a better journey since

Please call in sick for work again and give yourself a day (at least) to grieve and heal - you deserve to.
You'll feel better and more like yoursel fphysically after your next period and your hormones stabilize I think xxxx

I really feel for you OP, and can see some of my own actions in what you describe - for me it was wanting to just move on and get it sorted and be ok again, and feeling the whole thing was completely surreal and at least keeping going with life was real and normal. In my case the physical process has been complicated and it’s slowed me down, and I think that’s a good thing in some ways. Others have warned that if you suppress the feelings they just come back worse later, and I can believe it, though it’s hard to know exactly how to process something like this. It’s been a huge shock to me just how physical the process is, and how lasting its effects, and you can’t just wish that away. You need what you need. Do let DH know how you’re feeling, if you haven’t already, and see if there’s some way to create a bit of space and kindness for you and your body after all you’re going through. You’re not making a big deal of it - it IS a big deal.

@potentialmediator You need to take time to grieve and please be kind to yourself your hormones are all over the place just now and it is so hard to control them I really understand how you are feeling and it’s heartbreaking 💔 xx