Hi everyone,
Normally just a reader on mumsnet for advise and to read about everyone’s experiences. However I really wanted to ask for advise / experiences on MMC
I will start at the beginning. Last year April 2022 I found out we were pregnant which we were really excited about as this was completion of our little family (3 DC already) pregnancy seemed to be progressing well and I didn’t have any reasons to believe otherwise as I had not experienced a loss prior. Beginning of June 2022 (10+4) I had a really light spotting on wiping and mentioned to my partner as I left for work that morning just hoping it was nothing. Throughout the day the bleeding got slightly heavier, no pains, but called the EPU anyway for advise. I was asked to come in 3 days later for a scan to see what was going on. As they didn’t seem concerned this somewhat put me at ease even though the bleeding was still happening. I got home around 4pm and by 5pm I was on the phone to 111 as the pains had come out of nowhere and was passing small clots. While I was waiting for clinician to call me back I had excruciating pains (like contractions) back to back for around 30 mins and felt what I can only describe as a “pop” the pain then immediately stopped but had gushes and gushes of water, blood and clots. By the time 111 called me back they wanted to send an ambulance which I agreed to as the amount of blood was frightening. A couple of hours passed and the bleeding had slowed down and I cancelled the ambulance. When I went in 3 days later to the EPU they scanned me. I was then called to a separate room and told by a consultant there was something still there measuring around 5 weeks with a blood supply surrounding it. I was in complete shock and thought how can this be possible. They asked me to go back in 1 week to see if there had been any growth. We left feeling more confused than ever and slightly hopeful! A few days later I had some pains again (not like the first time) and passed what could only be described as a clot the size of a small plum. When I spoke to EPU to tell them they called me in for HCG blood tests to see if my levels were increasing or decreasing which would ultimately determine the outcome. After the blood tests I had a call to say they had decreased and basically that’s that. I fee completely deflated and emotionally drained.
fast forward to March 2023 we found out I was pregnant again. I was excited but also scared Beyond belief because there was no way I wanted to go through all of that again. I booked a private scan (6 weeks) just for a bit of reassurance. Went for the scan and it was inconclusive - meaning they could see a pregnancy but could not see if the pregnancy was viable at this stage. I was advised to rebook for 2 weeks time as by then they should be able to see a difference in growth. I couldn’t wait the full 14 days as we were due to go away for a few days and really wanted to know before going so we went after 12 days. The scan again showed the sac and something inside but could not determine a heartbeat at this point and said maybe my dates were wrong. Again I was advised to rebook for 1 week. We went away and had a lovely time but the not knowing was driving me insane. When I got back I booked back in at this stage by my dates I was 9 weeks. At the scan they told me they can see a heartbeat and everything looked ok but was measuring 12 days less than I had thought. We were happy, seeing the heartbeat was a massive relief!
1 week ago (11weeks) I started to have some spotting again. Was due to see the midwife for booking appointment the next day so waited to see her to mention it. Midwife wasn’t worried, just told me if the bleeding gets heavy and I have cramps to contact EPU. That night the bleeding did get heavier but no pains as such just mild cramps so I waited for the following morning to call EPU. They then booked me in for Thursday. They scanned me and confirmed no heartbeat! Baby had stopped growing around 7/8 weeks and they gave me my options. It was a lot to take in so I decided to go away over the weekend and think about it. Today (Monday) I went in for blood tests and tomorrow I’m going in for medical management.
after this last year I can’t bare going through this again. I’m 37 and we decided this was the last try as it’s emotionally and physically draining.
im absolutely dreading tomorrow and I’m not quite sure what to expect after reading some horror stories.
any advise would be massively appreciated. Sorry for the long post but if anyone is going through the same may find comfort in reading as we’re not alone.
wishing you all the best xx