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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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Medical Management

11 replies

Jellyfish55 · 08/05/2023 20:37

Hi everyone,

Normally just a reader on mumsnet for advise and to read about everyone’s experiences. However I really wanted to ask for advise / experiences on MMC

I will start at the beginning. Last year April 2022 I found out we were pregnant which we were really excited about as this was completion of our little family (3 DC already) pregnancy seemed to be progressing well and I didn’t have any reasons to believe otherwise as I had not experienced a loss prior. Beginning of June 2022 (10+4) I had a really light spotting on wiping and mentioned to my partner as I left for work that morning just hoping it was nothing. Throughout the day the bleeding got slightly heavier, no pains, but called the EPU anyway for advise. I was asked to come in 3 days later for a scan to see what was going on. As they didn’t seem concerned this somewhat put me at ease even though the bleeding was still happening. I got home around 4pm and by 5pm I was on the phone to 111 as the pains had come out of nowhere and was passing small clots. While I was waiting for clinician to call me back I had excruciating pains (like contractions) back to back for around 30 mins and felt what I can only describe as a “pop” the pain then immediately stopped but had gushes and gushes of water, blood and clots. By the time 111 called me back they wanted to send an ambulance which I agreed to as the amount of blood was frightening. A couple of hours passed and the bleeding had slowed down and I cancelled the ambulance. When I went in 3 days later to the EPU they scanned me. I was then called to a separate room and told by a consultant there was something still there measuring around 5 weeks with a blood supply surrounding it. I was in complete shock and thought how can this be possible. They asked me to go back in 1 week to see if there had been any growth. We left feeling more confused than ever and slightly hopeful! A few days later I had some pains again (not like the first time) and passed what could only be described as a clot the size of a small plum. When I spoke to EPU to tell them they called me in for HCG blood tests to see if my levels were increasing or decreasing which would ultimately determine the outcome. After the blood tests I had a call to say they had decreased and basically that’s that. I fee completely deflated and emotionally drained.

fast forward to March 2023 we found out I was pregnant again. I was excited but also scared Beyond belief because there was no way I wanted to go through all of that again. I booked a private scan (6 weeks) just for a bit of reassurance. Went for the scan and it was inconclusive - meaning they could see a pregnancy but could not see if the pregnancy was viable at this stage. I was advised to rebook for 2 weeks time as by then they should be able to see a difference in growth. I couldn’t wait the full 14 days as we were due to go away for a few days and really wanted to know before going so we went after 12 days. The scan again showed the sac and something inside but could not determine a heartbeat at this point and said maybe my dates were wrong. Again I was advised to rebook for 1 week. We went away and had a lovely time but the not knowing was driving me insane. When I got back I booked back in at this stage by my dates I was 9 weeks. At the scan they told me they can see a heartbeat and everything looked ok but was measuring 12 days less than I had thought. We were happy, seeing the heartbeat was a massive relief!

1 week ago (11weeks) I started to have some spotting again. Was due to see the midwife for booking appointment the next day so waited to see her to mention it. Midwife wasn’t worried, just told me if the bleeding gets heavy and I have cramps to contact EPU. That night the bleeding did get heavier but no pains as such just mild cramps so I waited for the following morning to call EPU. They then booked me in for Thursday. They scanned me and confirmed no heartbeat! Baby had stopped growing around 7/8 weeks and they gave me my options. It was a lot to take in so I decided to go away over the weekend and think about it. Today (Monday) I went in for blood tests and tomorrow I’m going in for medical management.

after this last year I can’t bare going through this again. I’m 37 and we decided this was the last try as it’s emotionally and physically draining.

im absolutely dreading tomorrow and I’m not quite sure what to expect after reading some horror stories.

any advise would be massively appreciated. Sorry for the long post but if anyone is going through the same may find comfort in reading as we’re not alone.

wishing you all the best xx

OP posts:
cherrypied · 08/05/2023 20:52

I'm so sorry @Jellyfish55 it's the worst time.

I had both medical and surgical management in separated occasions. Just take a long phone charger and hope you get a private room with loo. If you had the option for medical I'd go for that.

Keep trying don't give up. You've still got time.

Loose comfy joggers or shorts, drinks bottle, pads, nice food.

Oxalis00 · 08/05/2023 23:04

I’m so sorry for your losses, @Jellyfish55 All the not knowing is brutal, and then with knowing comes the grief :( And somewhere in there is the physical process of passing the pregnancy. It is physical, but not as bad as I’d feared. Everyone is different, but I’ll share my story.

I had medical management just over a week ago, but at home. The way I had it, there was a first pill orally (I think to open cervix? I felt a weird feeling/shift about 30 mins after taking it, but nothing more) and then 48 hours later 4 vaginal pessaries. I guess that’s what you’ll have tomorrow if you’re an inpatient? I read online the action/pain from these peaks between 2.5-4 hours after taking them. I found that reassuring to know, so I could pace myself. Hospital will presumably manage pain relief for you. I took ibuprofen before and paracetamol after 2 hours. EPU gave me codeine too, but I didn’t take them. I actually didn’t find it painful - just a sort of bright, lively feeling in my womb. Hot water bottle was enough. What I wasn’t prepared for was what I passed - regular gushes of lumps that looked like liver. I didn’t know if these were blood clots as such, and I now think this was uterus lining. I could feel it coming intermittently and would get to the toilet to pass it. For me all of this took about 9 hours, ramping up in frequency a bit like labour, after which I passed the sac and the gushes immediately slowed. I’ve been bleeding with a few clots since, but it’s easing now.

From what I’ve read online, though, and from speaking to a few friends, experience seems to differ hugely. The thing to know is you’re in good hands, and if you’re worried about anything at all, at any time, just ask the staff. Take care xx

Oxalis00 · 08/05/2023 23:17

As for advice - take a water bottle to keep hydrated, and maybe a few sports drinks. Snacks too, keep energy levels topped up. Agree with PP on comfy gentle clothes. Hot water bottle! And have something easy to follow/comforting downloaded to watch - it may take a while. And - if it’s the sort of thing that you might personally find comforting, a cuddly toy? I didn’t want to feel alone, and having something cute and fluffy that reminded me of my DC was surprisingly helpful. I’m also a very grown up 37 year old BTW, and did not know until know I’m such a softie…!

Your body knows what it’s doing. Wishing you all the best xx

Unicorn2023 · 08/05/2023 23:18

@Jellyfish55 I’m so sorry this has happened to you 😢 I can’t offer you any advice as medical management didn’t work for me and because it was my 5th miscarriage i wanted it tested to see why this keeps happening so I ended up with surgical management but I am sending you so much love and strength ♥️🤗

Unicorn2023 · 09/05/2023 16:51

@Jellyfish55 hope you are ok 💔😢♥️ xx

Oxalis00 · 10/05/2023 09:53

Yes, thinking of you @Jellyfish55 Hope you can get some space to rest xx

Jellyfish55 · 10/05/2023 10:36

Hi everyone

thank you so much for your messages ❤️

i went in yesterday for medical management with the expectation I’ll be sent home after 30 mins to manage at home. However this didn’t go to plan unfortunately.

on doing my observations on the EPU prior to the tablets all 3 were high, blood pressure, temp and pulse rate. 3 hours of trying to get them all done and nothing was working so I was admitted to hospital last night. They suspect I have an infection and have advised the best course of action is to go for surgery. I’m really upset as I wanted to try and avoid it but I suppose the best thing is now getting myself better so I can go home. I’m currently on the ward waiting to go down to theatre.

again thank you all for your messages xx ❤️

OP posts:
Unicorn2023 · 10/05/2023 10:45

@Jellyfish55 so sorry to hear that ♥️ the day I got my surgery I got home that night I have everything crossed you do too ♥️ xx

Oxalis00 · 10/05/2023 11:09

So sorry @Jellyfish55 that sounds like a really stressful experience. No wonder blood pressure was up! If it is an infection you definitely want it sorted ASAP. I felt wary about surgical management but so many people on here have said it was quick, straightforward, and they’d choose it again. I hope all goes well and you’re home soon xx

Crimsonripple · 10/05/2023 11:27

Are you having medical management or surgical management? I've had both - medical once, surgical twice.

My two surgical experiences were vastly different but if anything like the second time it would be 100% what I recommend.

Crimsonripple · 10/05/2023 11:29

Sorry I missed your message. How strange medical management at your weeks was done in hospital. Mine was done at home. I wouldn't opt for that again.

Surgical meant it was all over quickly and relatively pain free.

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