First miscarriage at 9weeks I'm 42

[CarolinaCam22]

Hi,

The story:

(I'm not familiar with these forums but thought it could help me get some precious info so this is my first message!! :)
I'm 42. I've got not children. I met my husband late in life and started trying for a baby 6 months ago. I got pregnant easily. My husband is ten years younger than me.
This weekend I had a miscarriage at 9 weeks. First miscarriage. It happened on Mother's Day so not so great :( but I don't let these type of stuff get to me too much. I feel absolutely fine. I had one painful night of cramps and lost it all in one go and now I'm just bleeding as if I was on my period.
I feel mentally good as well. I understand this is a natural thing and somehow this is helping me process it quite easily which I am really thankful for.
I will try again for sure as soon as my body allows me to.
I was told at the hospital that the embryo was on 4mm so abnormally small at 9 weeks. It wasn't developing properly and they couldn't see a heartbeat. I started bleeding a little then it got worse and then the miscarriage happened.

What I would love to hear about:

Has anyone else in their 40+ had a similar experience with a pregnancy that's not developing well?
Did you manage to have a healthy baby after?
How long did it take you to get pregnant again?
I'm not too stressed about it. I think what happens happens. I obviously would love to become a mother but I am trying not to push pressure on myself.
I know that's gonna sound bad but I absolutely hated being pregnant. The past 9 weeks were terrible for me. I'm a very young active 42 y old always on the go and super healthy overall and I suddenly felt constantly drained, sick, all over the place mentally. At least I know what to expect now :)

I would love to hear your stories.

Thank you so much in advance and wishing you all the very best!

Hi - firstly I am so very sorry to hear of your MMC. It’s a good sign that you conceived easily and so hopefully it can happen again quickly for you.

I am also 42 and I conceived quickly last year but also had a MMC - discovered at a scan at 8 weeks. I conceived again 4 months later but this baby had trisomy 21 and I TFMR at 12 weeks. I’m now trying again, taking supplements and remaining hopeful. I think at our age there’s a bit of luck involved and it can take longer to get the right egg.

@Iusedtobedontcall Thanks so much that's exactly the sort of feedback I need to hear. I'm not trying to compare myself to anyone but I want to stay informed. Husband and I want to try again even if it takes a few more tries. It is definitely more difficult at 42. I hope things work out well for you. And thanks again for sharing your story. I knew I wasn't the only one :)

Hello

Sorry to hear about your miscarriage.

I have a very similar story - met my partner later in life (he’s 9 years younger!) so only started trying for a baby when I turned 40. It took me 7 months to get pregnant the first time, then I had a MMC - after some spotting I was scanned at 8w and told the baby had stopped developing at 6w2days.

I was like you in that I mentally processed losing the baby ok, but unfortunately it took me 2 months for the miscarriage to complete (following 2 lots of medical management and an MVA). So that took its toll a bit. And meant I felt like I missed this magic 3 month fertile window to conceive again straight away!

However I did then conceive again on my 5th cycles of trying, and now 22 weeks pregnant so going well so far (I’m now 41). Also to my surprise (and luck!) I’ve had very few pregnancy symptoms so far - no nausea, fatigue etc.

Wishing you all the best for your future journey

@Natpat81 Thank you so much. There again super helpful to know. It's good to hear you're not the only one it's happened to. I knew that but hearing your stories makes it real. My husband was upset he's not educated when it comes to those topics so he reacted as if we were the only one on the planet it had happened to... I've had to explain to him that unfortunately this is quite a common thing and a reality for a lot of women. I'm feeling good again and so quickly after it that I surprise myself. I feel lucky it hasn't hit me harder. I know some women have a real hard time after a miscarriage and I totally understand why. I should be back in the gym in a couple of days which is my way to cope as well and also because summer is coming so if I'm not going to be pregnant and bloated I might as well have a flat stomach and a great bum. And we will definitely try again as soon as the bleeding stop. Thanks girls. I am very grateful for you taking the time to stop by and tell me your stories :)