Pregnancy after loss TW

[Anonymoususer456]

I suffered two losses last year and am currently 20 weeks pregnant, I have my scan this Friday and I’m absolutely bricking it!

ill be blunt! Im so scared they’re going to tell me my baby is dead inside me

ive had movements (not strong) but I do feel the baby move, I haven’t bought anything yet as Im so worried something will happen, I don’t think I’ll be ok until the baby is born, I’m constantly worrying, stressed.

is there anyway to settle my mind?
im going to the scan alone so I think this has me on edge too.

TIA

There is a hypnobirthing app called Gentle Birth with guided meditations/mindfulness practice I’ve found helpful in the past. It’s pricey but worth it.

@MommaFiona thank you, personally don’t think it’ll help me, I’m not frightened of birth itself, it’s just how I’m going to get through the rest of this pregnancy without worrying about my baby passing away, I’m just really struggling with being pregnant after my previous losses, I thought I was fine but getting pregnant again has made me realise I didn’t really grieve for my other two, they say hindsight is a wonderful thing 😅

Maybe general mindfulness might be helpful instead? If it’s not something you’ve done before it can be hard to see how it can do anything to be fair. I’m sorry I don’t have the answers for you, it’s a tough one because while it is very highly likely at this point in your pregnancy that your baby will be ok, your fears are still valid. Bad things can and do happen during pregnancy but we need to find a way to get through the day and not dwell on the infinite permutations of what could be, and deal with what is. I just found out I am pregnant again after a loss in November and I can already feel the anxiety creeping in to replace the excitement. So I will be downloading that app this evening 😅 that is what works for me. Maybe you can try a few different approaches until you find what works for you. Have you spoken to any professionals about your fears eg. mental health midwife, a counsellor/psychologist or your GP? If you are finding the anxiety unbearable, maybe there are medications out there that might help too and that are safe to take during pregnancy.

Same story only my 20w scan was 4 weeks ago.
I relaxed a bit more couple weeks ago after realising that I'll miss out on so much due to constant stress and panic.
You've been through a lot already and you deserve to enjoy this pregnancy 🌈

@MommaFiona thank you, I’ll definitely have a look in to it and see if it is any good for me! congratulations and fingers crossed for you, and no haven’t spoken to anyone about it except my OH.

@Loveyoutomatoes Congratulations! Thank you. I’m hoping after my scan I can relax a bit more. There’s a few things I need to buy and I’m just putting it off “just incase”