Don’t no what to decide ? No heart beat

[Rodgers2009]

I have never done anything like this before so please bear with me..

yesterday I attended my 12 week scan for them to tell me that there is sadly no heart beat. Which then followed by an internal to confirm.

the issue that’s not sitting right with me is that the baby was so small still they struggled to see it at first. It is messuring at 8 weeks and 5 days which they think they heart stopped nearly 3 weeks ago.

the thing that I don’t understand is that if I go by the dates of my last cycle I would be 11 weeks, but I’m 99% certain of the date I conceived which was 17th June. Which makes it exactly the same many weeks as which the baby was measured yesterday.

that means right that either the heart generally stopped beating yesterday or the day before?

I dont no if I’m just clutching at anything right now but is there any chance they could be wrong and it was just to small to see?

I need to decide today if I want the miscarriage to happen naturally which can take a couple of weeks or want the tablet to speed it on. I don’t want to keep thinking the baby is still there not living as it’s making me breakdown everytime I think about it but I also don’t want to take a tablet incase on a very small scale there could be a mistake?

any answers would be
it’s great full
thank you in advance xxx

I'm so sorry OP

Unfortunately you would absolutely expect to see a clear heartbeat at 8 weeks - really 6 weeks onwards

If you’re in any doubt, don’t take the tablet. Don’t rush a decision you might regret.

I'm sorry OP but you are clutching at straws. Babies aren't dated from conception date, it's from your last period - which means a fetus is technically 2weeks on the day it is conceived (strange I know).

Even at 8 weeks, you would be able to see a heartbeat.

I'm so sorry for the loss of your baby, and the shock of finding out at the scan x

When I was in this situation they offered to rescan in a week if I wanted to just be 100% there was no change, you could always ask if this is a possibility to put your mind at rest before making any decisions? X

Hi,
I have gone through the same thing this week.
Baby's heart stopped at 14 weeks.
I decided for medical management as I wanted an end date/day, rather than waiting.
Before I took the first tablet I asked if there was any chance the consultant could have been wrong. The doctor that I was with rescanned me, and confirmed.
I took the tablet on Saturday and was admitted on Monday to continue the process.
I'm not sure if the process is the same for your length of gestation.
Wishing you all the best, it's the most upsetting thing, and difficult xx

If conception date was June 17, you would be 11 weeks with how pregnancies are dated. Sorry OP

As PP said, pregnancy is counted from your last period rather than conception date. I am so sorry for your loss ❤x
You will probably go through lots of different emotions next few months, be gentle to yourself 🌺x

I’m so sorry 💛

I went through the same thing last week. I had my dating scan on Thursday thinking I was around 11/12 weeks, they told me baby was small and questioned if I had my dates right (last period date) so did an internal scan and confirmed our baby hadn’t developed past 8+5weeks and confirmed it as a failed pregnancy.

I was too upset to question anything at the time and they gave me some time to think about management options but I couldn't stop thinking that either they were wrong or I’d got my dates wrong.

They told me natural miscarriage could take a few more weeks but I started spotting on Sunday night and miscarried naturally on Tuesday. I don’t think I could’ve gone ahead with medical/surgical management without asking for another scan for reassurance. Sending hugs OP it’s such a difficult time xx

Thank you so much for all you kind words already. ❤️

I feel like I just needed to hear it from people it has happened too to let it just sink in a little more.

just writing this post this morning took so much weight of me that iv been laying in bed thinking about all night.

I already to very healthy children 13 and 5 so I just need to try and focus on them now and stop blaming my self.

im going to make the phone call today I havnt even brought my self to look at the leaflets or the scan yet 😢

thank you again everyone I really do appreciate it xx

I’m so sorry to you all that has experienced this Also I send all the hugs in in the world ❤️