When did my baby die?

[doingitalllagain]

I had a missed miscarriage earlier in the years when I was nearly 18 weeks. The baby measured 12+4. I was told this is likely the day the baby died and I just accepted that. However I’ve pregnant again and have been thinking it all through a lot and I searched back and my previous 12 week scan was done at 12+6 by my dates and 13 weeks by the NHS dates which doesn’t correlate with the baby dying at 12+4.. everything was fine on the 12 week scan

I just want to know I’ve made it further than last time and that baby is, at the moment, alive. I’m now 13+4. When do I book a scan to make sure now that I don’t know when the baby died? I know waiting a few weeks makes the most sense but I can’t, I feel so anxious because I know it all happened around this time somewhere

Sorry to read of your loss.

if you want a scan, and can afford a scan, just book one. If you book it today it's likely you'll be 14w by the time you have it and that seems as good a time as any.

If you can afford another one, have one at 17 weeks - then you'll get your NHS scan at 20w and will hopefully feel out of the woods by then.

I suffered a lot of miscarriages before my successful pregnancies and if you are like me that feeling won't go away. I had so many early scans as I was so terrified and wanted to know ASAP if anything bad had happened.

It did help a little but obviously as soon as the scan stops there is nothing to say the baby is fine from then on. Do whatever you can to get through but honestly I felt like that until I gave birth. And after birth I barely slept as I was still so terrified something would go wrong. Eventually it got better. Good luck OP, hope everything works out for you. If you have only had one previous miscarriage it is very likely it will.

I found being pregnant after losing a baby very stressful, the 'innocence' had gone and I worried all the time.

I think the dating scan isn't as accurate as they seem to state. I had a post-mortem on a baby that died around 6 month and they said the date the baby died as a 2 week period.

If you can afford it, I'd go for one at 14 and one at 17, which would break up the long time till the 20 week scan. If thats too much, maybe one at 15 weeks? I know its hard, but I'd really advise you against getting a doppler in your circumstances. There were a couple of occasions where I got very distressed not initially being able to find a heartbeat, and the EPU told me they thought it was adding to my stress and upset.

Did they give an edd at the scan last time? That will have been based on the size of the baby at the time of the scan so if you work back 27+3 days from the edd you should get the date at which the baby would be expected to measure 12+4.

I’d expect the date of death to be within a week either side of that date