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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Pregnancy after miscarriages

1 reply

KATEakaBOB · 05/07/2022 03:36

Hey you lovely people, I'm new here but my girlfriends (who are all older than me and all have children) have raved about this site when they're struggling so....here I am! Long story short, something awful happened to me when I was 15 and I was told that I could never have children. I'm anemic and my body couldn't deal with my heavy periods so I've taken the contraceptive pill EVERY DAY since early high school. Solely through only ever being in long term relationships, being sick for long periods of time and therefore the pill not being in my system...since my early 20s I have been pregnant 4 times. I have had 4 miscarriages, though, one being as long as 4 months! I nearly died all 4 times because my body couldn't cope. My Mum said, "Dr Monk said you couldn't CONCEIVE and you have! So keep proving him wrong until you're a Mum as you should be, sweetheart!" My Dad said, "Don't you dare ever try and make me a Grandad, be more careful! I'd rather have you always than a grandchild and no daughter!" Well, I'm 34 now and in a serious relationship....I lost both my parents by the time I was 30...and I have no idea who to listen to. My boyfriend has always known my situation and accepted it saying he'd rather be with me than be a Dad. He saw me holding my baby nephew a while ago, he saw how happy and natural I was with him, he suddenly decided that he wants to make me a Mum because I've always been one, just without a baby. He told me that he wants to try but after one miscarriage he wants to stop. I don't know what to do. There's twins in my family, too, and that's an even greater risk! I'm scared, should I listen to my Mum or Dad?

OP posts:
Essexgalttc · 05/07/2022 08:44

First of all I’m so sorry for your losses, of your parents and miscarriages - that must be heartbreaking for you.

Second of all you shouldn’t listen to your mum or dad, you should listen to what YOU want. I’d personally seek a couple of doctors opinions if you do choose to have a baby, if you have had issues in the past like you say.

I unfortunately lost twins at 9 weeks pregnant in April, they are higher risk but the chances of conceiving twins are a lot lower than single pregnancies and you would be monitored if you was to conceive twins.

All the best for the future and whatever you decide to do should be the right choice for you xx

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