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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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How long for natural end to missed miscarriage?

13 replies

8251peacock · 08/05/2022 22:54

Hi all,

Will try and be brief:
Last period was 4th March, regular 26 day cycle, first positive pregnancy test on 29th March. Second pregnancy, but DS is 13 so a long time ago! And I’m now nearly 41. Due date this time would have been 7th Dec.

Sick as a dog with DS, zero sickness this time. So although boobs v sore and super tired, something felt wrong. Booked private scan at 8w6d. Had abdominal and then internal scan, they advised that measurements were for 7w2d, 1.13cm in length (I think) and no heartbeat found. The dates being over a week out and no heartbeat at that measurement meant conclusion MMC.

Went home, had really bad cramps for about 36 hours, assumed it was the start of the MC but nothing came. I now think it was the internal scan that caused the cramps as she was in there for ages and it did hurt.

My question is, now what? The scan was 5 days ago so the MMC must have happened 2 weeks and 2 days ago. How much longer would I be likely to wait for something to happen? To date I’ve not had a drop of blood, spotting, nothing. I’m in quite a physical job and worrying all day in case it suddenly starts, no one at work knows what’s happened, the pregnancy or the MC. I’ve still had no contact from midwife at all, I did a self referral online at 6 weeks and downloaded badger notes etc but still no call or anything. I figured I’d wait for them to get in touch and explain the situation but I’m starting to get anxious.
I think I’d probably prefer the natural route rather than medical intervention if possible, I just don’t know how long is too long to wait. Boobs still really sore and huge, less tired on the whole but still really bloating in the evenings to the point I look very pregnant, which isn’t nice under the circumstances.
Thanks for any advice/insights :)

OP posts:
RainbowLiverpool · 15/05/2022 10:17

Hi @8251peacock
i just wanted to let you know I am going through the same.
I thought I was 8 weeks pregnant and it’s my first pregnancy and I’ve been trying for 3 years and this was my 3rd round of IVF.
Went for early scan on Thursday and no heartbeat found and baby measuring 2 weeks smaller than expected.
They told me it is a missed miscarriage and I have to go back this Wednesday coming to confirm with another scan.
in the mean time they said I might miscarry naturally but if I don’t then I have the option of pessary to speed it up or surgery to remove it.
i have very painful cramps but no spotting yet.

I am going to ring the hospital today and see if I can get the surgery booked in. It is horrible walking around knowing that I’m pregnant and also not pregnant. Still feel tired and nauseous but bloated belly has gone down a bit.
This is the most devastating thing that has ever happened to me. I feel so low, and to top it off scared of the pain and blood that’s to come.

i am so sorry this has happened to you too. Let me know how you get on xx

8251peacock · 15/05/2022 11:18

Oh @RainbowLiverpool, I’m so sorry you’re going through it too. It really is horrible. I’ve heard the term MMC before this happened to me but never really stopped to consider what it meant. Walking around knowing it’s there but not there is definitely the worst part.
So I went to the hospital to be re-scanned on Friday, when I would have been 10+2, nothing had changed obviously, still measured 7+2 with no heartbeat. Luckily they are taking the private scan as first scan so they aren’t making me have another NHS one in two weeks, which I was really worried they might do. I opted for surgery as natural didn’t seem that it would ever happen and I can get back to work quicker, they don’t know so much more unexplained leave would be tricky.

I have a pre-op booked for Tuesday and surgery on Wednesday afternoon. Don’t have much information about what time I will be able to leave after etc but she said I’d get all that on Tuesday. In the meantime I have started bleeding a little since yesterday, not much but some cramps too and enough to worry me that it might all come when I’m at work this week, as I was planning to work Monday to Wednesday and my job is quite physical. So idk what will happen. In some ways I guess I’m pleased my body has finally caught on to what’s happening but at the same time it’s been nearly 4 weeks, you couldn’t wait 3 more days?!

Good luck to you and I hope they will get you booked in soon 💛

OP posts:
RainbowLiverpool · 15/05/2022 15:25

Thanks @8251peacock it is so difficult to navigate.
I rang the hospital today and asked for surgery to be booked but they said they can’t do anything until they see me for the next scan as it’s against protocol. So that just means more waiting.

I’m the same as you in that I’ve got straight back to work. Had to run an event for 140 people on Saturday and was so anxious I might start miscarriage then but all was ok and in a weird way it took my mind off it for a bit.
I’m self employed and also have work 3 days this week and will try to do it all but it’s not ideal.
Huge support to you! I think it is amazing we can turn up to work and keep going through all this.
for me I feel it’s better to keep busy but I know it’s different for everyone.
Maybe in a couple of weeks I’ll feel differently. Good luck for Wednesday xx let me know how you are afterwards

8251peacock · 15/05/2022 21:43

Yes I’d definitely rather work if I can, distraction is good. Plus I don’t have much holiday entitlement left and I’ve never been off sick so I’d rather not start now. It’s just the worry that it’ll all come flooding out when I’m there! But I’ll just take stuff in with me in case, and keep hoping that it doesn’t. Which in turn feels a ridiculous thing to hope for as all I want is it out so I can start towards feeling vaguely normal again.

I hope the hospital don’t keep you waiting too much longer. Tbf my appointment was Friday, she said we’re quite booked up atm so I was thinking it could be ages but then she said so it’ll be Wednesday. Which seemed relatively quick I thought. Fingers crossed yours is scheduled soon after too 🤞

I will let you know how it goes 👍

OP posts:
8251peacock · 19/05/2022 09:07

Thought I’d better update this while I can still remember… had my surgery yesterday.

So I arrived at the EPU at 2.30pm as arranged. Saw a nurse who confirmed my blood results, PCR, MRSA test and all the rest of it came back fine, so we were good to go. She also had to check my forms and calculate my BMI. Then a doctor came who was super thorough, probably because she had a student in tow. Explained the procedure in great detail (more than I wanted to hear tbh!) and had me sign consent forms. I had to choose if I wanted to take any remains home or have the hospital cremate them. I very definitely chose hospital. Then it was back to the waiting area.

A lovely nurse came and walked me down to the day surgery ward. Set me up with a bed and a chair, but I stayed in the chair. Lots more forms and health questions, blood pressure check and then I had to get changed into surgical gown and stockings. You can keep your pants on at this point which I was happy about! Dressing gown and slippers over the top (you should 100% take a dressing gown if nothing else, spent almost the whole time in it or under it) and then you just sit and wait. And wait! There was one woman before me, and one after. The one before got taken quite soon after I got there and I hoped I’d be soon after but apparently they had a few emergencies so the theatres were tied up. So I just sat there, for ages. I had a book but I just read my phone really. The worst bit was being so hungry, I’d been nil by mouth for food since 8am and water since 11am. But it was manageable.

Finally about 5.45pm I had to get on the bed and have 2 tablets of misoprostol inserted to soften the cervix, so it’s pants off at this point! I was then told I had to stay laid down and not to move for an hour so they could take effect. So more waiting, just read on my phone the whole time. Then a little before 6.45pm, two nurses came to wheel me down to the theatre. Two anaesthetists were there and talked me through it, put a canula in my hand. Got off the bed and onto the surgical table. Then they put an oxygen mask on me, and injected something, she said a little now, more later. As soon as she did it my vision went strange, I was focusing on the clock opposite me and it was moving really strangely, not unpleasant at all, just weird. That’s the last thing I remember until I woke up.

Came round in recovery room, had a horrible taste in my mouth but they give you water with a straw immediately which helps. The two nurses kept me talking, about anything really, food, holidays etc. I was really shaky from the anaesthetic which always happens to me but it was fine, it wore off fairly quickly, about half an hour maybe. Once they were happy they wheeled me back to the same bed space I’d waited in originally and got me some toast. I wasn’t really hungry but I knew they won’t let you go til you’ve eaten so I had it anyway, and it was fine. Drank more water. They did a few blood pressure checks, I was on the low side but still acceptable. The surgeon came round and said the procedure had gone fine, all sorted but that I’d lost more blood than is usual so they needed to do an extra test. I don’t really know what the test was but it was just a fingerprick test which they then put on a small slide into a handheld machine and my result came back as 109 which they were happy with. Didn’t really understand that bit but it was ok so I didn’t really care!

Then they let me get up and get dressed, I felt totally fine, not shaky at all. Got dressed and walked to the toilet, had a wee and changed pad for a nicer one, had the hospital one I woke up with and they are not great. So def take some nicer ones of your own with you. They were then happy as I’d eaten, drank and peed so they said I could let my partner know to come get me, which I did.

While I was waiting a truly lovely nurse had a chat with me, about the procedure, about feelings after, about looking after yourself and each other, she really was amazing. Gave me all my paperwork and some leaflets. Then my partner turned up and off we went home! It was about 9.15pm when I left.

Last night I had some cramps but no worse than a period. Bleeding has slowed right down already. I slept really well, thank you general anaesthetic! I’ve had no painkillers at all so far today and still feeling ok, just like I’m having a period really. I could take paracetamol and or ibuprofen and I expect I will later but for now I feel good. Just going to lay about watching crap telly today. But I wanted to get this down while I still remembered!

Should add I don’t have to go back at all, unless I get any adverse symptoms or if a pregnancy test is still positive in 3 weeks time. They said I can expect my first period in 4-6 weeks, and after that it’s totally fine if we want to try again.

Please don’t be too anxious about it, obviously it’s far from ideal but all the doctors and nurses were incredible, so nice and a few hours later you’re at home feeling super relieved that that stage is done. Good luck @RainbowLiverpool and I hope they get you booked in soon, if you haven’t been given a date yet 💛

OP posts:
lottie222 · 19/05/2022 16:52

Thank you for this @8251peacock I am booked in for a surgical removal tomorrow and feeling super anxious this has made me feel better. Sorry we are all having to deal with this 😞

Blue2020 · 19/05/2022 18:14

@8251peacock Thankyou for explaining what you went through. I hope you heal and recover quickly.

Im a month ahead of you in terms of the dates but pretty much the same. Bfp on 28th Feb, had a private scan on 1st April mmc. I then had epu scan a few days later. I had to wait two weeks for a second scan to confirm mmc.

Just before the second scan I started bleeding and also caught covid. So my scan got pushed back another week. During that week I passed most of the pregnancy embryo etc. It was intense pain and quite a lot of blood etc. I wasn’t prepared for that.

I then had the second epu scan, they confirmed most had passed but I still had some to pass. That was 3.5 weeks ago. Yesterday I tested positive and was still bleeding. So I’m now booked in for ERPC on Monday.

This is a very long winded process. From a MMC to an incomplete miscarriage.

8251peacock · 20/05/2022 00:04

Oh @Blue2020 , I’m so sorry to read that. You’ve really been through it 😩 hopefully Monday will be the turning point for you.

Good luck for tomorrow @lottie222 , it’s not as bad as you think and the staff were honestly amazing, I’m sure yours will be too.

I’ve taken absolutely no painkillers today, had a teeny bit of period type cramps occasionally but totally manageable. Been up and about, went out for a bit, and all fine. Bleeding absolutely minimal. Really really glad I opted for the surgical route 👍

OP posts:
LittleDoveLove · 20/05/2022 07:19

Hello I am going through the same thing, should be 8.4 weeks but baby measuring very small. Have to go back to EPU next Tuesday for scan and decision. I've had cramps all along. I am hoping it is going to be natural but I don't think so. This week is horrible. We had hoped very much for another little one. Thinking of you all x

RainbowLiverpool · 20/05/2022 10:54

Thank you so much @8251peacock for talking us through it. Glad it is over and done for you. So sorry you had to wait around for ages. Good idea to bring the book!
I had my 2nd scan on Wednesday 18th and nothing had changed (which we all knew would be the case). It was horrible going back in that room and I told the nurse straight away that I wanted the surgery. She rang through to the theatre to book it and the next available date is Friday 27th!! I burst into tears and said that’s too long to wait…another 9 days!
she then went to speak to someone and came back and said I could have an MVA the next day which is basically where they remove it but you’re awake the whole time and she was honest and said even though they do give you some painkillers a few women have still said it was incredibly painful.
So no thanks! I want to be asleep so I don’t know what’s going on and to have the least pain possible.
However my cramping is getting worse and I don’t think I’ll last till next Friday. Pretty sure this is going to happen naturally now and I’m terrified.
I’m hoping it happens this weekend so I have a couple of days to deal with it. Otherwise I think I will have to take time off work next week as it’s too distressing thinking it could happen any moment. I still can’t believe this is happening to me.
Strength and solidarity to all of you ladies. This is so tough and I really appreciate knowing others are available to talk about it too. It helps being able to share xxx 💕

Summergarden · 20/05/2022 11:32

Hi OP,

So sorry you’re going through this.

Just seen your update and ERPC on Monday and was glad to see it. I had a mmc, things had gone wrong at 7 weeks but I didn’t find out until scan at 13 weeks. I still hadn’t started miscarrying naturally by 14 weeks so some women may have to wait a very long time for that.

I did opt for the medical method at 14 weeks (vaginal pessaries to induce mc) but unfortunately it was unsuccessful and tbh a pretty horrific experience. So I ended up having the surgical ERPC that you’re booked in for and honestly it was such an easy and smooth procedure. So quick, no pain and the staff were very kind. I was even back at work the next day.

I hope all goes just as smoothly for you OP, you’re doing the right thing by having the ERPC for sure.

8251peacock · 20/05/2022 12:26

Oh @RainbowLiverpool , I’m so sorry. That is a long wait and absolutely the last thing you need right now. Towards the end of my wait I did start to bleed a bit, no clots or anything, just like a light period I guess. And two nights before it I had some crazy cramping where I really thought this must be it coming now but it still didn’t. So it may still not happen. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not. All the options are crap at this point, and it’s horrible.

I know exactly what you mean about worrying about it happening at any time. I bought the hugest nighttime pads I could find and wore them all the time at work just in case, which was not very comfortable but made me feel a bit more reassured that if it did happen, I’d at least make it to the bathrooms without anyone seeing anything.

I’ll be thinking of you and happy to talk at any time 💛

OP posts:
RainbowLiverpool · 28/05/2022 17:41

Hey all,

so I had my D&C yesterday and this is just a pre warning if anyone doesn’t want to read on but it was pretty awful. The op itself was easy enough but before and after was the hard part.

I was booked to be at the Womens hospital for 12pm, my husband came with me to the gynae ward reception and he was told by a very cold receptionist that he couldn’t stay. There was no Explanation or care from her, she just said he had to leave and then muttered a question ‘have you had to stay in hospital over night in the last 3 months?’ or something like that but I couldn’t hear her so I said ‘do I have to stay Over night?’ And she just said ‘no you can go and sit down now’.
so I burst into tears and hugged my husband goodbye and he said he would wait in the car park so he was near.
so I sat myself in a corner. There were a handful of other women there. Some in surgery gowns already. Then 15 mins later I was called in for bloods and forms. Told to get changed into gown and given some hospital pants (they looked like a dish cloth) to wear.
I had a little cry in the changing room and stared in the mirror in disbelief this was actually happening. Then I got called into the anaesthetists office and he was really kind. I asked where I was on the list and he said first which was a relief.
I then went back to the very public waiting room with my makeshift pants and no bra on and sat there and waited for 3 Hours!!!
The phone rang and the receptionist listened and then walked down the hall. I heard her say my name to the nurse so when she got back I asked her if I had been called in soon. She said she had no information and i told her I’d heard her say my name so she must know something. She told me ‘I have no information for you’ and then stared at a piece of paper in front of her.
Honestly, her people skills were just terrible and the absolute emotional torture I was in was unbearable. She made me feel so small.
Anyway…15 mins after that the nurse came to give me misoprotol. I inserted two pills myself and half hour later they called me in for surgery.
I cried as they wheeled me in but they were all really lovely and I was asleep in no time. Woke up and was tired and no pain. I couldn’t believe it, I was so relieved.
They wheeled me to a shared room and I had a sandwich and cup of tea ( I hadn’t eaten since 8pm the night before!).
The nurses were really lovely thank god and told me to try for a wee. I was able to go but blood came gushing out like a tap had been turned on. They said this was normal and not to be alarmed. I was out by 6pm so 6 hours in hospital all together.
By 7pm I started to get really intense pains and pressure shooting down my back. I sat on the toilet for about an hour and a half and lots of blood came out and I was vomiting and had diarrhoea at same time. It was absolute hell. So painful I was doing my best not to pass out.
Rang the number the hospital had given me and stayed in a phone queue for one hour and 40 minutes. No one picked up.
i was thinking I would have to go to A&E but the pain started to calm down and I took some more paracetamol and managed to go to sleep.
It was honestly horrific but today there is a lot less blood and I just feel a bit sore. Still taking pain killers as they do help but I am hoping each day will be better.
Just to add I do get excruciating Period pains anyway so maybe that’s why it affected me like that.
i would still do surgery again if I had to - I think just because at least I know it is done now.
Sorry for the essay just needed to share xx

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