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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Original poster

3 miscarriages.... what now?

26 replies

awayinamuppet · 27/12/2007 14:09

Looking for any advice/ words of wisdom please...

my sister has had 3 miscarriages this year having just started trying to fall pregnant.

The first one was a missed mc discovered at 10 weeks for which she had a d&C

the second was a couple of months later when she started losing the baby at 7 weeks... no d&c required

the third was just the other day and she was only 5 weeks or so... very early...

she is going to the GP for investigation but I am wondering what that will involve and whether she needs to push for certain procedures? (no idea what those would be...)

Many thanks in advance for any help I am devastated for her as she is the most terrific, loving auntie to my 3 dc's

OP posts:
frazzledbutcalm · 27/12/2007 14:14

That's so sad. No advice but i hope she gets sorted. I'm pretty sure tests will be done nowadays and she'll be given all the help she needs.

Original poster
awayinamuppet · 27/12/2007 14:19

thankyou frazzled... i feel useless as i have no real experience or knowledge to offer her

wish i could wave a magic wand and tell her it will happen for her

OP posts:
andiemisletoe · 27/12/2007 14:22

away she needs to be very firm with her gp and ask to be referred to a recurrent miscarriage unit not just to a bog standard consultant
I have had 3 mcs and you need to have specialist tests that only some centres will do
she will need to have her thyroid function test done testing for antiphospholipid syndrome, clotting and some others including fsh levels
if she could afford it and is close enough the best places to go would be the recurrent miscarriage clinics at St Mary's in London or the one in liverpool if she has a private referral she will get seen much more quickly
I have two dcs now but the second ended up being ivf but I couldn't be happier

frazzledbutcalm · 27/12/2007 14:24

I know how you feel. I have 4dc and love being a mum. I've watched my sister put up with rubbish from her dh. However she finally ditched him, met someone else and now has her first dc. Im so happy for her that she has, at long last, got what she wants and deserves. i hope you eventually share the same joy for your sister.

Pod1 · 27/12/2007 14:39

My little sister lost two babies and she was fortunate enough to have a very supportive GP who referred her for a range of tests. Her heart was checked in great detail too. Encourage your sister to ask for any tests available. If nothing else it should help to put her mind at rest. I know how you are feeling as I was pregnant with my daughter when my sister lost her second child and I felt so terrible. She's heavily pregnant now (due in 3 weeks) so there's light at the end of the tunnel. Nature can be very cruel but I really believe everything works out for the best. I thought the world had ended when I lost my first baby. Now I'm typing with one hand as my baby daughter's flat out on my knee making my other arm go numb! My thoughts are with you and your sister at this horrible time.

MerryXMoss · 27/12/2007 15:44

Muppet, I have no experience of this but just wanted to post to show my support. It's good she has such a loving sister, and I hope she gets the support she needs.

Rosyrednosily · 27/12/2007 16:05

I don't know either, but I do know a few people who have had 2 or 3 miscarriages and gone on to have their children with no problems so I really hope that is the last miscarriage and your sister will have a baby next pregnancy.
It is such a hard thing and I've felt terrible and useless when people around me have gone through this agony.

Original poster
awayinamuppet · 27/12/2007 16:13

thankyou all so much for your words of support..

andie - that's really helpful too... never heard of any of those tests ... really is another world so I'm glad i posted on here...

... also it is helpful to keep in mind how many people ARE successful in their efforts eventually.

OP posts:
sazzybeehomeforxmas · 27/12/2007 20:20

Your poor sister - miscarriage is dreadful

Someone else has already mentioned this but the multiple miscarriage unit at St Mary's in Paddington under Professor Lesley Regan are absolutely brilliant - after being under her care for her last pregnancy my friend is now the proud mother of a beautiful baby after five consecutive miscarriages. I would suggest your sister pushes for a referral.

DeathBySnooSnoo · 27/12/2007 21:48

no advice here either but thought i would bump this for you and offer my support x

Ele08 · 28/12/2007 12:44

Awayinamuppet so sorry to hear of your sisters losses this year
Sorry i dont know much about the investigations but i had a missed miscarriage 2 weeks ago and i had a D and C and its the most horrible thing ive been through in my life. To go through 3 miscarriages must be absolutelt horrendous and my heart goes out to her
I hope everything works out for your sister in 2008 and she gets the good news she deserves.

Original poster
awayinamuppet · 29/12/2007 10:27

thank you again for all your kind words.

my sis has been to her gp who was really sympathetic and has referred her to a recurrent miscarriage unit near where she lives. Apparently if those tests don't show anything she will then be referred up to St Mary's.

am keeping everything crossed.

OP posts:
sazzybeehomeforxmas · 29/12/2007 10:41

That's good news that he's taking it seriously - some GPs are quite dismissive. Hope they can identify and fix the problem for her. Let us know what happens

Julezboo · 29/12/2007 22:02

Your poor sister

I have skimmed the thread lots of advice, ask her to also mention Factor V Leiden to her GP - After having 4mc's in one year I was diagnosed with this, was put on heparin injections daily and my monster is 11 months old now She will get there

muppetisacat · 30/12/2007 10:54

thankyou julezboo - I am passing all this info on to her and I think what helps her the most is to hear of the success stories such as yours

Lozza70 · 31/12/2007 12:22

Really sorry for your sister.

I also had 3 MC's this year and was referred to a recurrent MC clinic where I have just had the results from all my tests which were all clear. Sometimes you just don't know why MC's have happened but knowing that there is nothing seriously wrong has really put mine and my DH's mind at rest. We are now trying again and hope that 2008 brings us the baby we want. I can recommend reading Lesley Regans book on MC as this really explains some of the tests your sister will have.

justjules · 31/12/2007 14:01

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

justjules · 31/12/2007 14:09

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muppetisacat · 31/12/2007 15:17

Thank you lozza - so sorry to hear you are in the same boat... i guess it's heartening to have clear test results... not much comfort though i guess for your recent losses. That book does seem like a bit of a gem actually. Fingers very much crossed for you for 2008.

justjules - that is a great heap of useful stuff right there! - so pleased that you've managed to fall pg again - i know it's early days so you prolly don't want to count your chickens and all that but getting to week 10 sounds bloody marvellous! will keep absolutely everything crossed for you too

justjules · 31/12/2007 15:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

emmaclare · 14/01/2008 13:30

I just read about your sister and hopefully she may well have seen her GP now and got some advice. I know how she feels,Ive had 3 miscarriages in the past 2 years, my last one being Oct 06, all of them at around 7-9 wks. My husband & I had blood tests for various things (you only "qualify" for these tests after 3 or more miscarriages!)and nothing came back. In a way its good nothing is wrong but I sometimes wish they had found something which could then perhaps be fixed. The worst part about recurrent miscarriages is the not knowing why and you cannot help thinking that you have something wrong with you. Fortunately I have a 3 year old which helped us though although makes it more puzzling as I fell for him v.quickly and had the best pregnancy. I am 5 years older now (nearly 39)and sometimes wonder if could be the reason.

A friend has been through similar and has now been referred to Dr Regan at St Marys in Paddington. She goes next week and has waited a year on the NHS to see her. When I asked my consultant a year ago if I could be referred to Dr Regan I was told my hospital doesnt do referrals there - I now wish I had put my foot down and insisted. My advice to your sister would be to really push and insist on having tests and perhaps getting a referral to somebody such as Dr Regan.

I wish her luck. I have started trying again so fingers crossed 2008 will be our year!

BumblBeee · 14/01/2008 13:59

I have just had 2 miscarriages in the past 4 months so have a lot of sympathy.

Hope everything works out.

xxx

imopop · 16/01/2008 18:07

The St.Mary's miscarriage clinic are the best. I see Mr. Raj Rai there who is lovely. I had six miscarriages in the space of 2 years and went to see mr.rai privately. the best money I have ever spent, I am now 18 weeks pregnant, this is all down to st.Marys finding what was wrong. Lesley regan is also fab and I found her book very helpful: Miscarriage:What every woman needs to know. Its sold on amazon. I wish your sister every success in the futurex

rosie10 · 17/01/2008 10:21

imopop - did you get referred to St Mary's by your doctor/consultant or did you go privately? Am thinking of trying to get an appointment there without going through doctor etc. Was it horrendously expensive, if you dont mind me asking??

rosie10 · 17/01/2008 10:23

sorry! I just re-read your message and saw that you went privately. Did it take long to get an appointment? One doctor told me that even if I were to go privately it would take months.