TTC after one or multiple mc's

[chasingtherainbow1]

Hi

So I have had 2 mc now, one of which was a mmc. No children previously. I have managed to conceive easily, both pregnancies were conceived first month of trying but unfortunately both lost.

I am on day 9 of my cycle after my first proper period after mc and and throwing myself back into the TTC journey. Just wondering if anyone is in a similar position and would like to support each other through the journey?

I've seen and been part of other groups on the conception thread but feel it would be more beneficial on this as we would have been through the same.

@Missyoulittletyke

Hi all, hope you don't mind me jumping in, and i'm sorry to hear of all your losses. Its so awful and unfair isnt it how we find ourselves here. I lost my first at 20 weeks 2 months ago and it feels like the only thing I can do to make life bareable is to get pregnant again as soon as possible. My 1st was not planned, so ive never actually TTC until now. I got a BFN last week after my first cycle trying and it actually broke me. Im now so terrified that my 1st was a total fluke and i wont be able to conceive (i'm 33). Does anyone else have these kind of fears or have any tips for how to deal with the stress of TTC after loss?

So sorry to hear about your loss. That must have been really hard, especially at such a late stage. Hope you are doing okay. There is meant to be a good book called "Pregnancy after loss" which might be helpful. Remember that most people get pregnant in 6-12 months so I'm sure it will happen for you again!

I thought I was getting my period this weekend and after some light spotting everything has stopped. I've been feeling really emotional and last night felt absolutely exhausted so decided to do a test with IC this morning - stark negative. I am so confused! Before my last pregnancy my periods did this quite regularly (stop and then start again) but it's freaking me out now/giving me false hope.

One thing I noticed was that I was actually afraid to test, afraid it might be positive, and what a minefield that would be worrying about everything being OK. Maybe it's hormones but it's making me wonder if I am actually ready to ttc again after all

@PoopMaster yeah I've noticed that too. I think if I saw a positive now, the joy would lay for about 5 mins and then it would be back to anxiety and worry. I hate that mc takes away that part of pregnancy 😔

Hi @chasingtherainbow1 and everyone on this thread, how are you all?

I'm back to CD 7, been feeling quite weepy recently but I think that's hormones still settling down. I've finally caved and bought some mid-size clothes (pre-pregnancy trousers are still too small, all the previous midnight calories are still sitting in my thighs/butt despite me cutting out all snacks of any kind). I've had a headache for the past 2 days and generally feel tired and fed up. Hoping that's hormonal too and that I'll feel better going into the fertile week, or there will be no chance of any "trying" going on this month 😂

Hi @PoopMaster aww sounds like your having a rough time feeling ill. I hope you feel better soon! I felt a bit like that before my last period.

I'm on CD25 now. As I have managed to conceive first time in both pregnancies as I came off the pill, I had no idea how long my cycles were. Turns out they're 32 days and I did opk's this month to find that I ovulated on CD20 which is a lot later than expected. So I'm like 4/5DPO now and trying not to put too much pressure on myself for symptom spotting etc. Just going to wait for my period to arrive rather than tests if I think. Well I try to anyway 😂 I'm just scared that if it is positive, I'll just feel really anxious and awful about it.

Got achy boobs atm but that's just usual for me at this point in my cycle. But nothing to report yet

I've just had surgical intervention for my second loss in a row. First was at 8 weeks and was a MMC and the second was at 6+3 had a scan due to bleeding twice 10 days apart. It's so bloody soul destroying. I have one son who is 2 now and it seemed so easy with him, I was 38 when he was born. We are going to keep trying but I am so scared of it happening again. I've decided to not track ovulation and go with the flow this time, no expectations like when trying for my son. It's so not easy to have that mindset second time around, especially when it's not a smooth journey.

Good luck to you all x

@Robgem81 I'm sorry to hear you have had a second loss. It's such an awful time isn't it! It feels like it's never going to happen but I try and remind myself of how many women have gone through this and gone on to have successful pregnancies.

Update on my situation. I have just had a very faint positive on a pregnancy test and am not taking it as a definite positive yet. But it's so sad how this would have been an amazing time for me before the losses but now all I feel is anxiety. I feel like it's just going to happen again. I feel an urge to do something to help make this one stick but I know it's completely out of my hands.

Hope you're all doing ok 💕

@chasingtherainbow1 you are right there does seem to be sadly a lot of people who go through this and then have success!

Fingers crossed that line turns into a baby in your arms this time. I know you won't be able to not feel the anxiety. Just take it one day at a time.

Next time for me I will be taking aspirin and my Dr has been asked to prescribe me progesterone I don't think there's much more that can be done to help.

@Robgem81 thank you 💕 I am taking aspirin this time too and I have issues with blood clots caused by progesterone. So started that today and of the test gets more positive then I'll call the EPU as I have to take blood thinning injections. I took the injections in the last two but didn't try aspirin also. I've heard even with the injections, women are told aspirin will further help. Suppose it's worth a shot

Catching up with the thread, hugs @chasingtherainbow1 and hope you've had a good few days since your last post.

Still waiting to see if I'll get a surge on ovulation tests, if I did this week I must've missed it testing only once a day 🤷‍♀️ Had positive LH tests but not very strong, part of me wonders if I'm drinking too much water but I'm not so invested I'm willing to dehydrate myself!

After a couple of weeks of feeling sad and thinking near constantly about our little lost baby, I'm feeling a lot more serene this weekend. The grief definitely comes and goes in waves, it's been 10 weeks now but because of this up and down it feels a lot longer.

@PoopMaster unfortunately I think it was a chemical. I'm just grateful that it wasn't another missed miscarriage. Going to speak to the GP tomorrow and hopefully get a referral now because that makes it 3 losses now. Do they count chemicals as a loss under the rule of 3?

@PoopMaster that's how I was with ovulation tests until I realised I just ovulate a lot later than expected. So keep going and I'm sure it will come eventually. Although I have also heard that you can miss the surge sometimes. Just try and dtd as much as possible when you think you are ovulating.

The grief definitely comes in waves! Some days I feel so positive and other days I'm a mess thinking about it all. Whenever I'm feeling a bit down about it all, I like to read success after miscarriage stories to remind myself that it's not impossible and that hopefully one day all the pain will pay off!

I think I missed my surge, the tests since the weekend have got lighter/negative. We did dtd within the window of getting positives so keeping fingers crossed.

Hope things went well with the GP. I do wonder about whether chemicals count, you would have thought so as it could still suggest something might be going on that's worth investigating?

@PoopMaster well after 5 positive FRER pregnancy tests, the doctor told me my beta was less than 1. So they must be a bad batch of tests. The bottom test in this pic was 3 days after my blood tests and is very dark for an evap. So be careful with them in future!

However, I do feel slightly relieved that it was not another loss to add to my list and really glad it wasn't an ectopic which was what I feared. I have done a self referral to University Hospital of Coventry and Warwickshire to get a test for nk cells. I did this when I thought it was still a chemical and they have got back to me and said I should be able to get an appointment in 4 weeks so I think I'm going to go ahead with that anyway just to rule it out. So going to have this last month TTC before the nk cells test.

Won't let me post the pic for some reason

@chasingtherainbow1

Hi

So I have had 2 mc now, one of which was a mmc. No children previously. I have managed to conceive easily, both pregnancies were conceived first month of trying but unfortunately both lost.

I am on day 9 of my cycle after my first proper period after mc and and throwing myself back into the TTC journey. Just wondering if anyone is in a similar position and would like to support each other through the journey?

I've seen and been part of other groups on the conception thread but feel it would be more beneficial on this as we would have been through the same.

Hi I’m mum of one daughter she’s 8 in November . I tell you my story I’ve decided to have sibling for her when she was 3 yrs old , fallen pregnant straight away went for 12 wks scan and found out that there’s no heartbeat. I was 13 wks along and started bleeding 2 days later . Left at that 4 yrs later last September 2020 I decided to have another baby as I was mentally ready to fall pregnant again . Found out pretty quickly that I was pregnant again and super excited too my due date was June 2021 . Went for 12 wk scan and I could sense that something was wrong as the lady at scan was super friendly and just very caring . She asked me if I would like extra blood test and I said yes of course. Done blood test and scan on Tuesday by Friday the same week got phone call that there’s 1 in 7 chances that baby will have Down syndrome. Went for private blood test and got results after Christmas that 99.9% baby will have Down Syndrome. I opted for TOP ( termination of pregnancy) as I couldn’t do it . I wouldn’t put myself or my daughter through all of this not knowing if baby even survive as they said there will be problem with baby’s heart too . Everything had happened in January and by 16 weeks I wasn’t pregnant anymore. 8 weeks later started my period again . Fallen pregnant in May , 7 days later started spotting. Lost it at 6 weeks . Had a break in June . Fallen pregnant in July, week later started bleeding again. Lost again at 6 weeks. Went to see the gynaecologist and she’s done blood tests , smear and everything looks fine . Still waiting for a scan . She’s not interested in helping me in anyway as like she said she can strengthen my uterus. I think when I had TOP they’ve damaged something by pulling baby out and now I can’t keep babies in . I’m still trying I’m not giving up yet but my mental health is getting weaker and weaker and I’m on the verge of just being so frustratedly tired of all of this . I hope my story will cheer you up a bit and don’t give up yet . Xxx

Yes doctor said she can’t strengthen my uterus as she will only help me when baby is in to keep baby in once past 8 weeks . As if I could even pass that 8 weeks / keep bleeding at 6 weeks

[quote chasingtherainbow1]@Missyoulittletyke sorry to hear about your loss. I can completely relate to how you're feeling because I also feel like it will be something that's constantly on my mind until I get pregnant again.

After having 2 miscarriages and getting pregnant on the first try each time, I worry more about getting pregnant easily but just losing the baby early again and again. But I do also feel like maybe I had my chances and that it will take me forever to get pregnant again now. Just feel like I'll never make it past 12 weeks. I'm just having my first ovulation since my last one so fingers crossed it happens for us again.

Have you been given any explanation as to why you had a miscarriage? Am I correct in thinking that you can have tests after a pregnancy loss at that stage? [/quote]
I’ve started taking small dose of aspirin to keep blood flow , I’m so desperate to stop freaking having miscarriages that I’ll try anything and apparently all IVF clinics advise you to be on baby aspirin I’m taking 75mg every day . Try that too cost £1.89 for 100 tablets xx

@LauraLillyPad so sorry to hear about your losses 

@chasingtherainbow1 that's frustrating about the tests, though I know what you mean about relief too. I've just been using ic tests so tend to use them to confirm a suspicion more than anything as you have to wait a bit longer with them anyway.

I will look at baby aspirin, it was something my midwife suggested I should take from 12 weeks (when she left a message after I'd already miscarried) so I guess starting earlier won't hurt.

Hello, I hope it's ok if join you all. I am so sorry for your losses and just reading your stories makes me feel less alone. I had a miscarriage in August at 11 weeks.
My period has been so long this month. What was your experience with first period after loss? It's actually freaking me out because they usually last about 5 days. This one has been almost the entire month of September. I am considering reaching out to my GP.

@hellointhere

Hello, I hope it's ok if join you all. I am so sorry for your losses and just reading your stories makes me feel less alone. I had a miscarriage in August at 11 weeks. My period has been so long this month. What was your experience with first period after loss? It's actually freaking me out because they usually last about 5 days. This one has been almost the entire month of September. I am considering reaching out to my GP.

How long is so long and how much you’ve bleeding? I had my first period 8 weeks after my miscarriage and I think lasted a out 2 weeks but period after that was really short like 4 days then now it last 3 days or 4 at the most . As long as you’ve got period that’s fine unless is very heavy and lasts for weeks and weeks . Everything will be all over the place and your cycles will be over the place too after miscarriages that’s normal xx

@LauraLillyPad I'm sorry to hear about your losses ❤️ I'm going to start baby aspirin too. Do you take it after ovulation or on the day you get a BFP?

@PoopMaster yeah I think I'll just be buying the boots strips for testing next time as they have always been accurate for me too.

@hellointhere my period after my first loss was like a normal period but I think the first loss was more like a chemical. My period after my mmc came after about 6 weeks. It was fairly heavy but not unmanageable. I think it lasted about 6 days and I'm just on my second period since then. I think mc's can alter your periods for a while so it may take some time to settle down. Maybe just give your GP a call if you're worried about the length of it. It might just be that your body is trying to shed the remainder of the lining. I hope it stops for you soon

Hi @LauraLillyPad I started my period 3rd September and stopped 9th. Then started again 13th and is still going, today is the 23rd! It's been light mostly, but not the whole time. That's three weeks?
I don't feel any pain, but I am freaked out.

Something's up with my mumsnet app I can't see any new posts on here at the moment so I'm sorry if I'm missing new posts.

Hmm I've been trying to find more info on taking low dose aspirin when ttc and in first trimester, it looks like the research is a bit mixed though and the recommendation is 12 weeks onwards for mothers over 35/those with a previous low birth weight (I'm in both categories).

I'm so nervous of doing anything at all that might cause more harm than good Anyone got links to up to date info on this?

In other news I definitely feel a bit iffy, could be 7dpo and really hoping this is our month 🤞 I've mentioned this to DH and he is convinced it's just not going to happen, I think our mmc has shaken his confidence even though we have 2 DC and conceived all pregnancies pretty quickly.

[quote chasingtherainbow1]@LauraLillyPad I'm sorry to hear about your losses ❤️ I'm going to start baby aspirin too. Do you take it after ovulation or on the day you get a BFP?

@PoopMaster yeah I think I'll just be buying the boots strips for testing next time as they have always been accurate for me too.

@hellointhere my period after my first loss was like a normal period but I think the first loss was more like a chemical. My period after my mmc came after about 6 weeks. It was fairly heavy but not unmanageable. I think it lasted about 6 days and I'm just on my second period since then. I think mc's can alter your periods for a while so it may take some time to settle down. Maybe just give your GP a call if you're worried about the length of it. It might just be that your body is trying to shed the remainder of the lining. I hope it stops for you soon
[/quote]
I’m taking all the time through the entire process . Started last month on 75mg and I will stay until the end of pregnancy . If i fall pregnant lol
I spoke to the pharmacist and he said to me it will do more good then harm but I have to take this for while before seeing any effects. Low dose when I read it all over the internet it will help and supposed to stop miscarriages . Ivf clinics always recommend to stay on it through the pregnancy and start way before trying for a baby . I’ve been taking for over month now and this will be my first cycle after 3 mc on it and if I fall pregnant and don’t loose this time it will mean this has worked for me so fingers crossed it will lol xx

@PoopMaster

Hmm I've been trying to find more info on taking low dose aspirin when ttc and in first trimester, it looks like the research is a bit mixed though and the recommendation is 12 weeks onwards for mothers over 35/those with a previous low birth weight (I'm in both categories).

I'm so nervous of doing anything at all that might cause more harm than good Anyone got links to up to date info on this?

In other news I definitely feel a bit iffy, could be 7dpo and really hoping this is our month 🤞 I've mentioned this to DH and he is convinced it's just not going to happen, I think our mmc has shaken his confidence even though we have 2 DC and conceived all pregnancies pretty quickly.

It’s entirely up to you I’ve read and spoke to the pharmacist and he said it will help but I would have to take it for while . I’m staying on it until I give birth haha ( need to fall pregnant first lol )I’m so desperate I don’t get any help and go nowhere with doctors help so I’m doing my own research after 3 mc in the row I’m taking aspirin and see if it works but only baby aspirin 75mg per day every day xx