How does counselling help?

[chasingtherainbow1]

Hi everyone,

So I had a mc in a March at 5.5 weeks and a mmc in June, I would have been 9/10 weeks but baby only measuring 6 weeks.

It has taken from 09 June until this week for my hcg levels to fully drop (had checks for retained tissue but turned out the hcg was just taking it's sweet time).

I think this has slowed down my ability to heal from the loss. Although I do feel like I have definitely come to terms with it all, I still have days where I just start crying out of nowhere if I am reminded or talk about it with anyone. My worry now is that it will happen again and I'm not sure if I can mentally cope with going through it again.

Me and my partner are going to start trying again this cycle but I'm wondering if it would be wise to maybe look into some counselling as I can feel the anxiety starting already and I'm only on CD7! Just wondering if anyone has received counselling before and if it actually made any difference? My thought process atm is that I don't feel like anything will make me feel better other than getting pregnant again and it being successful. Does this make sense? I feel like no matter what anyone will say to me, I won't feel any different about the situation.

If anyone has any experience would you mind sharing your thoughts

Thanks 💕

Haven't been to counselling myself but it sounds like it won't do any harm, why not give it a go?

Thinking of you. Also feeling like the only hope is one day being pregnant again

My friend had a very late miscarriage and she felt that counselling helped immensely. She found a lot of freedom in being able to say anything she was thinking, no matter how out there to the counsellor, without feeling that it would come back on her or she was was being judged or anything. I'm so sorry for your loss xx

I had counselling and found it quite helpful. I liked that there was no judgement and no opinions really, it was just me talking and saying whatever I needed to without the fear of it being repeated etc and the lady just prompted me with questions to draw me out. I had 5 out of the 6 sessions. I didn't like the direction it turned but the early sessions were good. So sorry for your loss and all the very best on your ttc journey x

Thanks for all of your replies. I guess it's one of those things that you will never know will help until you try it.

I might see how this cycle goes and maybe speak to my GP at the end of this cycle when I'll know if I'm either dealing with pregnancy anxiety or still dealing with loss and not pregnant. Just want to fast forward time now!

Thanks again ❤️

@chasingtherainbow1 I had counselling and it was amazing. I had some through a free bereavement service in my area which wasn’t great, but then went to a private counsellor who I loved and felt so comfortable with. I felt validated and it was an amazing way to get my thoughts and feelings out. I am a much stronger person now for it. DP didn’t have any counselling and is now regularly upset when I’m much better and haven’t cried about it for a couple of months. I would encourage anyone to go to counselling if they’re comfortable too. Hope you’re okay 💜

@chasingtherainbow1 since the 2nd miscarriage I suffered with anxiety and low moods. I waited on a referral from my GP via vita minds a mental health service, and was invited back to the early pregnancy clinic at St. Michael's hospital. I saw an excellent midwife nurse practitioner who was compassionate who just got what I was going through. She asked me how I was doing, what help I was seeking and the medical side in terms of stats when group of people go through a miscarriage(s) and why there is a 3 miscarriages rule in England before you can be referred to a fertility clinic. I personally was freaking out thinking everytime we will try it'll end on sadness/losses. She reassured me of the stats and that helped with my healing process as I found some info on the net varying. Along with counselling that my employer had very kindly paid for and an anxiety management course I have paid myself through Anxiety UK whilst I waited on my referral and counselling it has helped me personally immensely I also read an everything self help book and practise mindfulness and belly breathing daily. All the best to you ❤

@CMcA21 @Ali52021 thank you both for your replies. You have all encouraged me to want to take steps towards maybe getting some help. I have an appointment with my GP on Wednesday so I'm going to try and get the ball rolling then.

It's so unfair that we're having to go through this but I hope when we do get our rainbow babies it makes it all the more special.