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Missed miscarriage found at 12 week scan. Gestation dating 9w+1,followed by medical management and now expected management. Any other experiences of this?
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Katiehod · 23/08/2021 08:08

Hello,
I thought I'd post on here as I have found the site helpful when pregnant, and especially now I'm experiencing a miscarriage. I wanted to post to share my experiences of medical management as an inpatient (I'd been terrified of this and struggled to find many posts in my position prior to this) and to seek some advice regarding expected management.

We attended our 12 week scan last week to find out baby stopped growing at 9+1. We were both completely shocked as I'd had no worrying symptoms and believed things were progressing well. An internal scan confirmed it. We were asked to attend the EPU to discuss next steps. We sat with the manager who explained our 3 options - expectant management, medical management as an inpatient as it dated over 9 weeks, or surgical. My bloods were also taken. We also discussed disposal which was awful for us to think about but required. I think at this point I still didn't quite believe it was happening and that there had been some mistake. It was our first pregnancy and miscarriage, with no previous children.

We opted for medical management and two days later were admitted to a local ward. My husband was allowed to stay with me throughout and the staff were lovely. I had 4 tablets initially, then 2 tablets every 3 hours having 4 doses in total. I was so scared as I'd heard it could feel like labour pains. I felt some mounting abdo/back pain after the first dose, but things only intensified for me after the second. At that point I accepted codeine. Shortly after I felt a spurt of clear fluid and the bleeding began after. The pain was really uncomfortable but felt manageable and I knew I needed to do it. I'd recommend taking lots of thick sanitary pads with you. Overnight I passed lots of clots and also what we understood was our baby. This felt quite serene to do, not as scary to look at as expected and I think helped give us some closure (but each to their own decision). After the 4 doses the nurses wanted me to be reviewed by medics before further decisions could be made. After the last dose the bleeding slowed down a bit. I had an internal scan in hospital (which was unpleasant whilst bleeding but the staff was so compassionate of our situation throughout), which later confirmed some retained tissue.

I spoke with the doctors who advised we had the 3 options again - expectant management, further medical management and surgical. There were no guarantees any would fully work and a risk of infection is always there. We were fed up of being in hospital, felt surgery felt extreme for us and also didn't want to do medication when it hadn't worked fully last time. So we chose to come home and see if my body does what it needs to naturally. Things have really slowed down since coming home 3 days ago, my bleeding is like a light period, with some brief clots when I wee. I'm hoping my body might reabsorb the tissue naturally or dispose of it but we're just playing the waiting game. I need to ring the EPU today to let them know if we've changed our minds re:surgery. I think we will watch and wait, and if nothing else has passed in a week see if we can have a scan to establish next steps. Has anyone else been in this position? It just feels like my body isn't doing what it needs to do. Also happy to answer any questions about medical management.

Big thanks to all previous posters, it really helped me get my head around missed miscarriages in those early days.

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Girlwholifts · 26/08/2021 06:58

Morning @Katiehod

Thanks for starting a thread and explaining your story.

I had a scan yesterday at 9weeks and was delivered the same devastating news. I wasn't as far gone as you 7+4 and my conception was via IVF hence the early scans but I am also considering the medical management.

I had a scan at 6weeks and saw the baby and heartbeat which was amazing but it measured small so they advised another scan to check up. I felt a change in my mood over the weekend and told my husband I didn't feel the same.
I had almost convinced myself it was bad news before the scan as a safety net, hoping I would be proved wrong, I wasn't!

I took sometime yesterday and I looked up the options and feel medical is the best one for us as I feel I have some element of control. Your experience sounds very painful mentally and physically and until I experience it myself I cant begin to imagine how you've felt. I hope you are feeling better in yourself. Sending love

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YanTanTethera123 · 26/08/2021 07:07

It’s an awful experience to go through, so sorry for you both.
My second pregnancy ended in miscarriage but I was 19 weeks by dates and my baby had died at 12. I had a surgical procedure, very straight forward but many years later I still think about it.
I had felt something was wrong from the very start of that pregnancy, no idea why because everything seemed to be going well.
My love goes to you and any other mum going through this.

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Katiehod · 26/08/2021 08:05

@Girlwholifts So sorry to hear what you're going through. It is so awful and such a wave of emotions. We had an early private scan too at 7 weeks and felt reassured by the heartbeat. Will you be doing the medical management at home? I was absolutely terrified of it but it wasn't as horrific as I had mentally built it up to be. Big pads came in handy and a hot water bottle. I can't praise our local hospital staff enough, they were so good whilst I was in and are helpful as an outpatient.

I'm in a bit of physical limbo at the moment - saw a consultant on Tuesday who explained there is still a blood supply to the remaining tissue so that is probably why it's not come away yet. He wasn't keen on doing the medication route again as it didn't work last time, so we're going to see if it happens naturally and if it doesn't by Tuesday we will book in for surgery. I think I'll feel better mentally when I'm not in this weird no man's land. Like you looking back I had some changes, I felt a reduction in my sickness etc but just thought it was improving as I'd hit 10 weeks. I didn't have any inkling anything was seriously wrong.

@YanTanTethera123 I'm so sorry you had to go through that. It's so heartbreaking and I can't imagine I'll ever forget this. The grief definitely reflects the love you feel ❤️

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Wilmaa · 26/08/2021 08:13

I'm very sorry op Thanks
I had a D&C 4 years ago. It was calm, quiet and a much better experience than I thought considering what it was we were going through.
The staff were amazing I couldn't fault them.
I burst out crying afew times and they were there to comfort for us both.
Like pp I tend to think back to that day quite often, with sadness and thinking how the hell did I do it. You find the strength.
Sending love

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FPower · 26/08/2021 20:52

I’m so sorry everyone! I’m in a similar position, scanned mid July thinking I was 10 weeks and I was actually 7 weeks but the baby had died at 6.
I had to wait 2 weeks for a further scan to see if there was any change although I knew there wasn’t.
I had medication and then 3 weeks later (this week) I did a pregnancy test which was still positive. I went back for more medication earlier this week and then today. I still seem to passing clots I don’t know how much more can possibly be in there!
It’s so frustrating waiting to see if you need an operation and wondering how long this can possibly go on for. I really feel for everyone going through this it’s truly horrendous. I’d love to try again ASAP but we need to deal with the current situation before thinking about that.
Fingers crossed for the future for us all xxx

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FPower · 26/08/2021 20:53

Thinking back, I had a real change in appetite around the time the baby died. I had a really awful taste in my mouth and could never find anything I wanted to eat. Could be a coincidence but I’ll certainly be looking out for this next time.

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cadburyegg · 26/08/2021 21:05

I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a missed miscarriage picked up by the 12 week scan but baby died at 8+3. the process had already started and my body expelled the baby and lots of blood later that day. They did medical management a couple of days later in hospital because i was still passing some placenta. but that didn't work because I still had some retained products which were detected in another scan, so I had surgical management 2 days after. The surgery was actually the least traumatic part of the whole experience. The surgery was recommended to me in the end because of my experience and also they said there was still a blood supply going to whatever was left.

It's been over 4 years now and I still think about those times, and wonder. I hope you can take the time you need to heal.Daffodil

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Katiehod · 27/08/2021 09:13

@FPower I'm so sorry you're still going through this. My position is similar, scanned nearly 2 weeks ago to find the gestation had stopped growing 3 weeks prior to that, so 5 weeks now in total. I have retained tissue which is not coming away and just feel in a total limbo. If nothing has happened by Tuesday I'll be opting for surgical as the medical management didn't work fully for me. I'm desperate to try again too and resolve this ongoing physical issue. It's such an awful position to be in, hoping you get sorted soon. Flowers

@cadburyegg Your experience sounds similar to the position I'm in now. I'll be opting for the surgical route on Tuesday if expectant management is unsuccessful. My medical management helped me pass some tissue but not all and I have an ongoing blood supply to what's left. I never imagined the process of miscarriage would be so complex and drawn out. It's a really horrible time but my husband has been fantastic which I'm thankful for. Daffodil

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FPower · 27/08/2021 10:23

Thanks to all, apparently this is very common but I’d never heard of this type of miscarriage either. Seems such a cruel and drawn out process but I’m sure we will all get there. I keep been told everything looks healthy in there and it was the embryo that won’t have been right. That only makes me nervous that I have a problem with my eggs now! But I think that’s me been a natural worrier!
I exploded at my mum yesterday as she kept saying “is this normal??” Which I feel a bit bad about but just didn’t need it Blush

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FPower · 27/08/2021 10:26

@Katiehod fingers crossed for you on Tuesday! I’m back Wednesday to see if there’s a change but definitely will be opting for surgery if needed.

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Katiehod · 27/08/2021 15:58

@FPower it's truly awful and I think any future pregnancies will naturally be wracked with anxiety if I get pregnant again. I think a few explosions are allowed at the moment, hopefully your mum understands 🤞this experience has definitely opened my eyes to what miscarriage actually is and how long these things can take. Thankfully I'm off work so not having to deal with too many people while my hormones are off the scale!

I have the option of local or general anaesthetic for the surgery but to be honest I think I'll go for general, I'm over being prodded and poked and would rather be asleep for the final bit!

I'll be thinking of everyone Flowers

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Notashandyta · 27/08/2021 16:06

Happened to us twice, both at 12 week scan Sad

Both times opted for surgical route. No problems whatsoever.

Sorry op. You will get through this.

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Katiehod · 28/08/2021 09:37

Thankyou Daffodil @Notashandyta I'm so sorry you went through it twice. In retrospect I wish I'd opted for the surgery originally but hopefully next week it'll happen!

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Girlwholifts · 31/08/2021 17:01

@Katiehod how you doing?

Sorry for the radio silence I’ve been away for the weekend, perfect timing to get our heads around the news!

There was us saying we wanted this over quickly and my body has taken note and I started bleeding this morning. I’ve had the worst cramps like nothing I’ve ever experienced before and passed some clots while on the loo.

I totally don’t blame you for thinking of the general route our bodies/minds have been through enough. Have you seen your consultant today?

I’m still waiting to hear from someone, guess I will just have to wait a few more days and see what happens.

@FPower hope all goes well for tomorrow. Sorry your also going through this horrible time. 💛

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FPower · 31/08/2021 19:32

@Katiehod how did it go?
@Girlwholifts thank you! Been a bit down today but picked myself up. My OH deserves a medal! Feel better now I know im there tomorrow xxx

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FPower · 01/09/2021 12:40

I had my scan today and still some tissue left, I am booked in for an operation tomorrow feel sort of relieved in a way that this will all be over with! Not much time to get nervous about the op.
Hope @Katiehod is ok and all others going through this. Sending 💐 and ❤️

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Katiehod · 01/09/2021 14:12

@Girlwholifts A weekend away sounds lovely. Hope you managed to relax a bit Flowers how are you getting on today? I hope you're not too uncomfortable Daffodil

@FPower Hope you're feeling a better today. Glad your OH is a good egg! Are you having the general anaesthetic or local for it? I'm booked in for a scan tomorrow to see if there is any tissue left, if it is it looks like they will do the surgery on Friday hopefully. I'm hoping the tissue has passed without me noticing, but feel relieved that it will be sorted one way or another by the weekend. I'll be glad to be out of this limbo and focus on recovering physically as best I can. It's been a long few weeks hasn't it! Hope everyone is holding up Flowers I've never eaten as much chocolate in my life. Funnily enough though my desire for coffee has never returned since going off it in pregnancy, and I used to love it! How bizarre ey xx

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FPower · 01/09/2021 15:32

@Katiehod general anesthetic for me. I’m so relieved too so I know how you feel! They said I can start TTC in 2 weeks once I have a negative pregnancy test so that’s great news as we are having a weekend away in 2 weeks!! Feel so much more positive.
I also just ate a bar a galaxy in 10 minutes Blush

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Katiehod · 02/09/2021 14:47

How's it gone? @FPower I hope you're managing alright and all went as well as it can Flowers

I went for my rescan this morning. After some heavier bleeding and clots yesterday it had reduced down to 24mm. I had some bloods and a vaginal swab as I'd noticed the smell of the blood had been unpleasant, and saw a doctor to discuss the next steps. She was so lovely and we discussed surgery as a next option. She asked if she could examine me first, her and a very reassuring nurse took a look using a speculum. The doctor was able to remove the blood clots and after some further manouvre remove the retained tissue without surgery! Just alot of coughing and pushing on my part Grin It was quite uncomfortable at times but felt more like a heavy pressure than anything. I felt so relieved that she's been able to remove it without further intervention. She said it was hanging low in my cervix so she suspected she could get it without needing surgery. So I'm really chuffed that that aspect is sorted. She has also prescribed me a weeks worth of two types of antibiotics as there is an infection brewing, so definitely mention it if any of you notice any scent to your bleeding. I didn't feel unwell but equally not myself either so it's been good to know that might have contributed. So hopefully things are now sorted and I can heal over the next few days. Daffodil she also mentioned that my next period will be very heavy so that was helpful to know. Hope everyone is doing OK xx

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FPower · 03/09/2021 06:46

@Katiehod that’s brilliant news! You must be so relieved to not have had the surgery! Good stuff! So are you supposed to do a pregnancy test in a couple of weeks to check you’re all clear?
Mine was all fine, worst bit was I had to wait 6 hours for mine as a woman came in with an eptopic pregnancy so they had to operate on her- understandable! But the operation was absolutely fine, I was a bit dizzy and tired at first but out of surgery by 5 and home at 8! If I went through this again (god forbid!) I would opt for the surgery as it’s been far quicker and less stressful than the tablets which are turned my stomach inside out!
I also noticed a bad scent and had been given antibiotics for BV. They did swabs on Wednesday to check the antibiotics are for the right infection.
Ready to rest this weekend and move on now! Lots of love to everyone, what an eye opener it’s been! Xxx

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Girlwholifts · 03/09/2021 07:46

@Katiehod @FPower So nice to read that you are both on the mend. I'm unfortunately in that limbo stage of still bleeding and not really having much care. I spoke with the hospital yesterday and they given me 2 weeks to continue bleeding, test on 20th and if I'm still showing as pregnant then they will call me in to investigate.

If you don't mind me asking, how long was you both bleeding? Sorry very personal question.

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Katiehod · 03/09/2021 08:19

@FPower I was so relieved and glad she was able to do it like that, I didn't have time to get anxious so it worked out quite well! She said to do a pregnancy test in 2 weeks, which would make it 7 weeks since the embryo stopped growing so hopefully no more intervention needed or retained products! I have a box of cheap ones so I'll probably do them once weekly to check on things though. So glad your surgery went well and you can recuperate now. Me and my husband both said in hindsight that we would have opted for surgery straight away rather than this mix of medical management and expectant management we ended in, particularly as its been so prolonged! But we had no idea what was for the best when we started this unexpected journey. I'm trying to feel in control so have been looking into TTC vitamins and lifestyle changes I can make for when we feel ready. I hope you can relax this weekend - we're away with friends but I'll keep a low profile with the dog, no hot tub or booze for me but I don't mind!

@Girlwholifts I'm so sorry you're still in the middle of it all. Its such a horrible process especially when services aren't as responsive in your area! We miscarried around the 9 week mark which would have been just over 5 weeks ago, but found out at the scan just over 2 weeks ago. I didn't get any bleeding at all until after my medical management, but once we returned home the bleeding was just like a mild period and nothing like I'd read other people had with tissue/large clots etc. It carried on like that for 2 weeks until Weds when I actually passed 2 larger clots/tissue and more blood (which was about half of the retained material). But to be honest without intervention I'm not sure how long it would have gone on for, my body just didn't seem to be doing what it needed to. Maybe my body would have done it eventually but the waiting is awful especially when you have a return to work looming. I think the waiting is the worst psychologically, emotionally and physically. Sending love Flowers xxxx

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FPower · 03/09/2021 08:41

@Girlwholifts I’m so sorry you are in this position, it’s completely awful I really understand, the waiting around and not understanding is as bad as having a miscarriage. Similar to what @Katiehod said I had no bleeding and found out when I went for a scan. I had lots of bleeding and clots on the days I took the medication, then bled for about a week after each time, with it becoming more like a period the day after my medication and then getting more dark brown blood towards the end. I did bleed the sac and the embryo after my first medication so it worked to a point but I had some tissue that was stuck the doctor said it wouldn’t have come out without the surgery and was enough to get an infection and be testing positive still.
@Katiehod sounds brilliant to have a lovely weekend with friends planned! Eat lots of nice food and nice walks with the dog. I am so happy it’s only 2 weeks to test as we are going for a trip to London in just over 2 weeks so hopefully and can put it all behind me then! Xxx

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FPower · 03/09/2021 08:45

@Girlwholifts just thought, keep a close eye on the smell and your temperature incase you get an infection like we both did from it been in there too long. In hindsight that was fine though as antibiotics seem to be clearing it and it meant I got seen quickly so don’t panic if you do just contact someone xxx

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