Feeling quite alone

[MrsRfilange]

First time posting on here.

Currently going through a potential missed miscarriage. Re scan on Friday to either confirm or not. Hoping for a miracle but really not expecting much.

I feel really alone, I never told anyone I’m pregnant and no one knows I’m going through this horrible wait to see if my pregnancy is viable. My partner, I honestly don’t even know if he cares much. He says the right things if it’s expected - I don’t bring it up as it makes him uncomfortable and tbh I’m not great at expressing feelings and emotions sometimes.

However I’ve got my re scan on Friday (I’m going alone due to covid) and he was talking about potentially going a hiking trip with friends on Friday and mentioned it’s a shame I can’t get Friday off!! I was honestly incredulous he couldn’t even remember I have the scan at least. He apologised and said of course he’d be there for me and he just tries not to think about it and then just changes the subject.

I think if it’s bad news on Friday I’ll confide in a close friend who went through something similar recently and she could give me some insight into what happens next.

I’m sorry to hear this :( I went through a miscarriage 5 years ago & it’s not nice at all. It sounds like your partner is having a hard time too. My husband had a breakdown after mine, he kept his feelings then couldn’t take it. Give your partner Time. If it is a miscarriage, you need to yourself too or speak to your family. You will get mild (like period pains) contractions if it is a miscarriage. Xx

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I'm in the same situation, had scan yesterday at 7w2d and they could only see an empty sac. They took bloods and HCG was low. It all seems very conclusive to me and the midwife seemed to feel the same way but the consultant still wants me to go for another scan next week. It feels pointless, I'm on progesterone due to IVF which could be stopping any bleeding so I'd rather come off that and wait for a bleed.

I'm sorry you're not getting support from your partner. Does he stick his head in the sand as a way of coping with things?

It's such a lonely time. I was just going for a standard early scan due to IVF so had no warning and my husband wasn't allowed in due to covid, it's a horrible experience. And now I feel in limbo, working and trying to act normal but falling apart inside.

Really sorry to hear this, how are you doing? I had mmc last year and similar reaction from partner, he just considered it as not a baby at all yet so we reacted very differently. The most helpful things for me were telling a few close friends, one even before the scan which did help as she was waiting to hear from me. Then I had counselling which helped me process everything.
I am now 7 weeks and experiencing miscarriage like symptoms so worried it is happening again, trying to speak to gp but doubt they'll let me have an early scan as they don't give them out lightly. I might book a private scan and just go in expecting the worst.
Sending strength to all, it is just such a difficult time xx