3 years later and still struggle?

[bookworm34]

Is it normal to struggle so much with a miscarriage?
3 years ago nearly I lost triplets just a few weeks before they could receive help to stay alive when born, I really struggled for two years I had terrible depression.
But then I managed to take it in my stride and just try and live and I felt a little better now 3 weeks before their anniversary I'm struggling again. Very badly. Every time I close my eyes I can see them. I can't sleep through nightmares (it was extremely traumatic loosing them). Is this normal is this what Going to happen every year? I feel like I can't function as I'm so sad.

I'm so, so sorry. I can't imagine how heartbreaking the loss of your babies must have been. I lost my baby in the second trimester, possibly at a similar stage as I was only a few weeks away from when the doctors could have tried to intervene. It was and is the worst thing ever to have happened in my life.

My MIL told me that she'd had something similar happen, and that the pain and the love stay, but we learn to live with it. Sometimes the pain feels overwhelming. Today's one of those days for me too. But I believe my MIL, that we'll live with it.

I'm sorry I don't have something more helpful to add, I just wanted to let you know you're not alone.

I’m so sorry for the loss of your babies. I’ve had three losses, two of which were in the second trimester. Most days I’m fine, but then sometimes the grief just hits me like a slap in the face. I get flashbacks to being in the scan rooms finding out they had died, and I just can’t actually believe it’s happened to me. Often i can’t stop dwelling on things like how unsupportive friends were at the time, or the inappropriate things people said or did. Other times I feel a physical ache missing my babies. Pregnancy announcements or causal comments people make about pregnancies/babies can send me into a depression for days because I’m so jealous that other people can enjoy pregnancies. It really is an unpredictable rollercoaster.

Losing babies changes your life in so many ways, but like @Scirocco says, we learn to live with the pain and I know I will be ok. You will be too, but your babies will always be a part of you. I try to embrace the bad days and let myself feel the emotions as a way of feeling close to my babies.

Sorry that’s all a bit of a ramble. Sending lots of love for the anniversary ❤️