Surgical Management - how to move forward

[Kitte321]

Hi all
So I’m having surgical management for a MMC discovered at 7 weeks and confirmed at 9 weeks tomorrow. I was under a fertility referral so was allowed an early scan - and then it all fell apart.
I’m petrified about tomorrow. I have a 2 year old so just felt that medical management was too uncertain but now I’m worried about scarring and anaesthetic.
I guess what I really wondered is how you moved forward after the procedure? I’m desperate for a second child but the last few weeks have been hell and I am scared to death about TTC again. I just don’t know how to deal with the thought of another loss.
It’s relevant that I’m 37 so very aware this is only going to get harder.
Experiences much appreciated! x

You don’t have to have the anaesthetic. I had it without and, whilst not the most fun few minutes of my life, it was ok. And I got back to my 2 year old a couple of hours later and that helped. Don’t worry about the procedure, it’s fairly quick and simple. You’ll be ok.

I moved forward by overly obsessing about trying again. Luckily I conceived again 6 weeks later and yes it was stressful having those first couple of scans but once the 12 weeks were over it was ok. But I also just tired to focus on my two year old and how wonderful she was and how lucky I was to have her.

You have my sympathies, it’s a horrible thing to go through. But the benefit of surgical management is it’s done and dusted and you can get back to normal life quicker.

Good luck xx

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I had surgical management pretty much this time last year. The actual procedure was fine and I felt physically well again soon afterwards, I cried right up to them putting me to sleep though, I just didn't want to believe it was happening! But actually when I woke up I felt quite relieved, I threw myself back in to work within a week and all the Christmas preparations took my mind off everything to be honest plus having a younger DC at home, my DS was 3 at the time.

Everyone is different so just take the time you need to recover physically and mentally, be kind to yourself

Thanks so much for your responses - I’m sure that surgical management is the right thing - I just need a resolution. I
Imagine there will be lots of tears!!
@Wnikat amazing that you fell pregnant so quickly after though I can’t imagine the anxiety of those first 12 weeks. I would imagine I will detach as much as possible early on if I’m lucky enough to get pregnant again.
@morningcuppatea I think you’re right, the time of the year will definitely help and I can just focus on making Christmas as special as possible.
Thanks so much for your reassurance.
Once tomorrow is over I’ll feel better I’m sure x

Please try not to worry about tomorrow, I had my procedure today after a week of a failed medical management and I wish I had gone for surgical straight away. The staff were so kind and apart from waiting around the procedure itself was quick. I was petrified of GA but they put my mind at rest and considering it was a horrible situation it was a positive experience xxx

Thanks very much @Yellow78 for your kind reassurance. I hope you’re feeling as okay as can be expected and your recovery is speedy x

Thankyou and you 😘

So sorry for your loss. I had a MC at 11 weeks and had surgical management following an emergency (i lost a lot of blood). The surgery was fine and quite quick and was glad to get it over with (I was really unwell miscarrying naturally and nearly needed a transfusion and blood pressure dropped very low). The GA was fine (I’ve since had a few more and it really is ok although I know a little nerve wracking). I know it is a very hard situation as emotionally you are shattered and physically too. I went into have another MC a few months later but eventually conceived again and carried to term. Best of luck

Thanks @Namechange600 and I’m very sorry for your loss too. It’s sounds like you went through a very difficult time - it was the fear of something like that happening that lead me to surgical management. I mean all options feel shit, this just seems the least shit!
Congratulations on your successful pregnancy- I really hope I have the courage to try again (and that if I do I actually get pregnant - it took 12 months this time...) x