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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Has anyone had anything similar??

9 replies

Userki · 21/10/2020 14:09

Hi everyone, I’m new here, this is my first time posting, it’s also my first miscarriage and I had a read through other’s experiences on here but haven’t read many that were similar to what I’m going through now.

I found out I was pregnant in September, this would have been my third pregnancy, I have two happy DC, so know those familiar signs. My period is regular as clockwork so had the test ready for the first day of my missed period. Test was positive but started spotting the next day, very light pink, mostly when I wiped, very little on a liner, this continued the same way for 4 days, I phoned EPAS who put it down to implantation bleeding but I was told to do another test two weeks later.
After a long two weeks I done another test, positive again, but started lightly spotting again that night, again light pink and mostly when wiping, this carried on for three days, but it started after DH and I had had sex, so thought nothing more about it until two weeks later again, when I started spotting the night before my second missed period would have started. I was also aware that my nausea was dying down and my boobs weren’t as tender, I phoned EPAS the next day who gave me an appointment to come in for a scan three days later. The spotting continued but this time as well as wiping there was some pink in my liner too. The night before my appointment I noticed some little brown rice sized clots when I wiped. I think at that point I knew something definitely wasn’t right.
At my appointment they gave me a scan, according to the dates the midwife worked out I should’ve been almost nine weeks, they measured the pregnancy at just over seven and saw no heartbeat. Another sonographer came in and confirmed what the first had told us.
I was told to wait in a tiny room for a midwife to see me, by the time I’d waited on her I really just wanted out of there so when she came in I struggled to hear what she was saying but I do remember her saying we had three options and the first was to do nothing and let it happen itself, as soon as I heard that option I was up and putting my jacket back on to go home.
We left with a leaflet with what to expect and she wrote a phone number on it ‘incase I changed my mind about the medical option’.
I got home and my spotting became more like a very light period that night. The next morning I passed a long clot, I couldn’t see it very well with the blood in the loo, it was about the length on my little finger, I had some cramping and basically my usual period type bleeding (which isn’t a lot) for about five days, on the fifth day I had a heavy dull aching down in the small of my back, I took a couple of paracetamol and slept with a hot water bottle on my back.
That next morning I noticed there was more blood in the toilet than there had been, there was a couple of grape sized clots and the ache in my back was gone and the bleeding started easing off.
Today the bleeding is like it is at the end of my period and it’s only been eight days since the spotting became more like a bleed and I have the odd cramp in my abdomen now and again but the leaflet I got from the hospital says that can happen as your body starts trying to return back.

The thing I’m worried most about is a couple of my friends have spoken to me in the past about miscarriages they’d had at a similar stages to me and I remember them telling me about the long hours they spend on the toilet, doubled over in pain, all the blood and clots they lost, wasted bed sheets and pyjama bottoms, most of the posts on here are similar to their experiences too and it’s worrying me that perhaps I haven’t actually gone through the miscarriage at all yet and it’s still to come. I know everyone’s experiences are different but was anyone’s similar to this at all?

I’m sorry for the long post, not many people knew about the pregnancy and although DH is here and has been amazing, it’s not the same as speaking to women who have gone through it, and I don’t feel ready to talk to anyone close about it all yet.

OP posts:
dippyGirl5 · 22/10/2020 23:42

So sorry for your loss @Userki - my experience wasn't dissimilar to yours. I had a few hours of very heavy bleeding where I felt awful all day but nowhere near as bad as I've read of other women's experiences. I had a scan a few days after and they confirmed that there was a little bit of placenta still left. The bleeding tapered off and then I had another heavy-ish bleed exactly a week after the first ands that has been it. Had another scan a few days later and they confirmed that everything was gone - horrible but a relief too.

You may well have passed everything but have the hospital said they will rescan you to check?

Look after yourself and hope things improve for you x

Userki · 23/10/2020 10:10

Thank you so much for your reply @dippyGirl5, I had a scan yesterday and the found I’d lost a little of my lining and it’s only the sac that’s left, the part that would have been the baby and the part that would have been the placenta aren’t there, I’ve got an appointment to go in for the medication later today as my older two are at their dad’s this weekend and I’m am getting more and more worked up about this as the time is going on. I just don’t know if I’ve made the right choice. I am absolutely petrified of how it’s going to be and how I’ll manage both physically and emotionally. I’m worried I won’t cope with the pain or be scared of the amount of blood I might loose.
I’ve been having cramps again the last couple of days but there’s not much blood coming, mainly when I wipe again.

I’m so glad it went so smoothly for you, as awful as this whole situation is. And thank you, again, for replying. This last couple of weeks really has been a rollercoaster and I just want off it now.

You take care of yourself too xx

OP posts:
dippyGirl5 · 23/10/2020 11:36

So sorry it's not over for you yet.

I hope it doesn't get too bad for you. I was told if you are soaking a pad in an hour or less then that is time to go to A&E. Also, My GP offered to prescribe stronger pain meds so maybe you could get some to be on standby in case you need them. Emotionally it truly is a rollercoaster. It's so hard but people keep saying to let yourself feel it - and I think they are right - although it seems easier to get off the rollercoaster - I think we need to stick with it.

x

Userki · 24/10/2020 13:16

Well I had the medication at 2.30pm yesterday, started having some mild cramps within half an hour. I was home for 3.15pm and the bleeding started not long after, it was quite light to begin with and the cramps were then accompanied with what I can only describe as a sensation that something was happening inside, a bit of a vague description but I’m not sure how else I can explain it, then at 6pm I was aware of feeling something coming away (so sorry if this is TMI) I went to the loo and felt clots coming out. I settled myself in my bedroom, which is right next to a bathroom, with my DH, we put on some Netflix and I curled up with a hot water bottle. Had a couple of trips back and forward to the loo, each time losing more clots. I went between paracetamol and ibuprofen for pain relief but at not point felt that I was not coping, or doubled over in agony.
Around 7pm my back felt a bit achey and DH rubbed it for me. As he did I felt what I can only describe as a pop and ran through to the loo again and more clots came out.
I curled back up in bed, and had another couple of trips to the toilet, but was sleeping by 11pm DH said.
I got up at 3am for the loo and although some clots came out I realised that the bleeding was a bit lighter. So since then the bleeding is more like a period and there’s still little clots passing too.

I’m not sure whether that’s me or not, I kept waiting of this awful pain and blood pouring out that I keep hearing about, so I’m a bit nervous it’s not happened again.

Today physically, I feel fine, I feel a little weak, but I think that’s just tiredness from the sleepless nights I’ve had over the last few weeks.

You are right @dippyGirl5, I think we do need to ride the rollercoaster. I had a really good cry before my appointment when I had a moment to myself, then after I took the medication the midwife left us in the room for 20 minutes and DH and I just broke down, had a really, really good cry again.

We have a duvet and crap telly day planned today.

Thank you so much again for your response. Talking to people who have gone through it really seems to help too, makes you realise there is light at the end of the tunnel xx

OP posts:
Salome831 · 25/10/2020 15:29

Hi All,

Thank you for sharing your experiences, I could possibly be miscarrying but I’m not sure.

I wonder if anyone can advise if they have had a similar experience. I’m currently 4 weeks and 6 days pregnant going off my last period. I started spotting 9 days ago and I assumed it was my period but it continued as really light sportive so I took a test 7 days ago. However, the spotting continued for around 4 days and became slightly heavier (like a really light period) 3 days ago and counting. It’s pink/red when I wipe with no clots and only a very mild ache occasionally.

I went for a blood test 2 days ago and have another on Monday so that the doctor can see if my HGC levels are rising properly.

I’m still increasingly getting pregnancy symptoms and am trying not to keep my hopes up too much because I haven’t read anywhere the constant bleeding could be okay but the fact that there are no clots has my hopes up. Anyone aware of anything similar over a 9 day period?

Now81 · 25/10/2020 15:39

Hi OP, I have had two miscarriages, the first was as I’d seen described here - huge amounts of intense pain and bleeding along with passing big clots, bleeding then continued for two weeks after I passed the sac. This was at 10 weeks but baby had stopped growing at 6w. Second was much , much easier - at 7 weeks. I had some light bleeding in the week or so before then waves of pain (that didn’t need painkillers) and passed the sac within 3 hours of that starting. All very quick. I guess what I’m saying is that there doesn’t seem to be a standard process. Hope that you are doing okay and that the physical process isn’t too bad. Take care and sorry for your loss

Salome831 · 25/10/2020 15:48

Really light spotting

Userki · 26/10/2020 17:21

My heart goes out to everyone who has ever went through this, it really is one of the most difficult things I’ve had to experience.

@Salome831 when do you get your results from your blood test? Unfortunately I’ve had no experience of what you are going through but really have my fingers crossed for you.

@Now81 you are so right, the midwife that has dealt with me at EPAS gave me a call today to see how everything went and said the exact same, that every single miscarriage is different and there’s no to the letter rules. She thinks that by the sounds of it it went as it should have. On Friday she gave me a test to do in 3 weeks time and if it’s negative then this physical part is over. And I’m genuinely sorry you’ve had to go through this twice, my heart breaks for you, I hope you are doing ok?

My bleeding has been like a heavyish period since Saturday and I’ve had no discomfort.

I have had a very tearful day today but DH went back to work this morning and my two DC were at school so it’s been the first chance I’ve had some proper time to myself to take a breath and process what’s actually happened. I know grief gets easier.

I hope you all are doing ok and I really do appreciate all the comments, it really helps knowing you’re not alone, big virtual hugs to you all xx

OP posts:
Salome831 · 26/10/2020 20:41

Thanks for responding. I actually got my results earlier @Userki. My HGC levels are progressing the way they should be which could be good but I’m now about to have a scan to check it’s not an ectopic pregnancy due to the bleeding. Hopefully it’s not too early to see anything.

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