How long were you off work after miscarriage?

[Annie1211]

My doctor signed me off for two weeks, I'm meant to go back to work on Monday and I don't feel ready. I feel so anxious at the thought of going back and my emotions are all over the place.

I don't know what to do. Is it normal to feel like this? Xxxx

Nowhere near enough time for any of them (I had three and no one suggested I should take time off to recover) and my mental health is still recovering. In my shock I think I was trying to ignore what was happening and tried to power through.

If I could go back and give myself advice it would be to take more time.

Sorry for your loss xx

Ironically lockdown has let me reset. I had that panicky anxiety feeling every day up until we locked down. Just not having to go through the setting off to work process has helped (and I’m sure feeling rushed back to work extended this anxiety)

None for #1 (happened on a Friday evening) 2 days #2 happened Thursday morning. I don't think you could get signed off then, but my boss gave me compassionate leave off the record

I didn't have any time off for my MC. My work recently said that if I ever feel like I need time then I should let them know, but I would never be able to catch up again. My MC was in January and I privately break down every time a friend/colleague announces a pregnancy (most recent one being today) and it makes me feel so pathetic. In hindsight maybe I should've said to hell with the workload and taken a break back then...

I didn't have any time off at all, we were to put it bluntly in our busiest period, and I felt being busy and doing stuff, having other things to think about would be better (for me, that is, YMMV) than moping about at home.

@Ariela I think that's how I felt at the time and now it's hitting me like a tonne of bricks!

First m/c at 17 weeks on the eve of a two week holiday. Cancelled holiday but no time off work. Only two people at work knew so never mentioned again.

Second m/c about 6/7 weeks. I was on a business trip and just carried on the following day.

Third m/c 12 weeks - stayed in hospital after an ERPC but had an 18 month old to look after so got back to being a mummy straight away.

I needed time to heal and in hindsight wish I'd had more support but it was a long time ago now and my dc are grown up.

I do think it's often a good idea to crack on though and work through it rather than ruminate.

I had one week signed off - we went to the beach ( it was freezing) but I needed to be away from reality for a bit and just have spend some time with DP. When we got home I felt ready to move forward. If we hadn't have gone away I would have gone into self destruct

I took 4 weeks off. Hospital initially told me I was having a miscarriage, only to then tell me a week later it was actually an ectopic pregnancy. I was a bit of a mess mentally and couldn’t have coped with work.

HI ladies
I am 20 years old. I had a missed miscarriage this Friday 28/08/20. It was my first pregnancy. Am not happy. Been in pains. I find myself crying. Lost of appetite. I don’t want to tell my partner as he lives in Paris and he is gone back on Sunday. Am so lonely. Abdominal pains, back pains and still bleeding 😭😭😭😭. I feel like I lost a part of me.

Op I took a week and should have taken much longer. I was very vulnerable when I went back. Do get signed off for another week if you possible can

@Shubby79 I’m so sorry about your loss. Please do talk to someone in real life to get some support as you really need it and sending you some virtual hugs

I took a week off and then needed some more time the week after because I had a second round of bleeding. I made the mistake of thinking that I could go back as soon as the physical symptoms were over but in hindsight some more time to start coping with the mental impact would have been a good idea.

I had an ectopic in April, I was signed off for 2 weeks but mentally I didn’t feel ready to return (I work for social service which doesn’t help...) so I had another week. Was ready to return after that

I had a very early MC some years ago, just coming up to 6 weeks. It happened on a Monday as I remember and I called in sick that day, and then took the Friday off as I had a hospital appointment to check that nothing was left. Worked in between as normal, only one person at work ever knew.

It was an unplanned pregnancy and I'd only known for a few days, so it was upsetting but not traumatic. Now years later I'm actively TTC I can already envisage that it would be much much harder to carry on as normal.

for everyone on this thread x

I had 4 weeks off but i was 12 weeks and lost 5 pints of blood in a hemmoridge so physically i was very unwell and mentally i was destroyed. Sorry for your losses

I had three weeks off in total for an MMC at 12 weeks. The first week was in and out of hospital then when I got the OK from the hospital they signed me off for a further 2 weeks recovery.

It was a horrendous time but for me I felt that was about the right amount of time.

Hope you're ok.

None for my 1st 2 mc. My 3rd I had a few days off waiting for my D&c to be booked in. I had the d&c on the Friday and was back at work on the monday.

The first few days back at work were awful but I was very glad to have the distraction.

Well, I think it would depend upon how far along you were so as regards physical recovery. My last miscarriage (years ago now) started the early morning hours on the day of my booking in appointment at 12 weeks (a Thursday, I remember it well). I had to have a D&C and stay over night. Discharged on Friday and back to work on the Monday.

@AdoreTheBeach I think it’s so individual. I had Mmc found at 12 week scan and had to have surgical management. I had and needed a week off and to be honest was a mental wreck. I should have taken longer

I can well imagine some women needing longer even for a pretty early mc Eg with heavy bleeding, complications or for grief and mental well-being

I worked all the way through mine. Wouldn't recommend it though.

I had about two weeks off for both. It was enough time to recover physically and to start to get to grips mentally. The only thing I would say is that I am fairly independent in my work and able to decide how much I do and when. So after the two weeks there were still days when I didn't do much. If I didn't have work like that I think I would have needed a bit more because it would have been too much stress for me to be "on" all the time.

I think having stuff to do is good because having a routine and something else to focus on it helpful. But ultimately I think I would try to have as much time off as possible and stay busy doing things I love, rather than crying silently or trying to avoid crying at work. It's a lot of pressure on top of a lot of pressure.

Just me though - everyone deals with things differently and I know for some the total distraction of work is helpful. The only thing I would say is that if you need more time and you can have More time then take it xx

I had a MMC and it actually "happened" last Weds night at 10+4. I took Thurs and Fri off work sick as was feeling terrible physically and mentally. Went back to work on Mon as I work for the NHS and didnt want to cancel any more patient appointments and needed to be in the dept. Take what you need.