I just want to explain...

[BabyDust13]

So first off I'm very sorry for the long post... but here goes

We started trying to conceive in September and I was very much naive to how easy I thought it would be

In February I had a chemical pregnancy. I didn't even know they were a thing but I could just about get my head around it after reading they are quite common and deciding I probably shouldn't test early. (Easier said then done)

Come May I had a bfp went for an early scan around 6 weeks 2 days and saw a good heartbeat.

I booked another private scan at 9 weeks so my partner could come and found id had a missed miscarriage. Unfortunately there was no heartbeat and the little bean had stopped growing around 7 weeks.

I opted for medical management at home and 3 weeks later did another test and much to my dismay a bfp showed itself. The medical management hadn't worked.

So now I'm about 3 weeks after a d&c and I'm trying to decide how I feel about trying again. Obviously I really want to start DTD again and me and my OH want a baby more than anything but everything I've been through is just making me worry

I don't really know what I'm trying to say because obviously we have to keep going to reach our goal it's just been a tough year

Thanks if you managed to keep reading this far and good luck to you all

Hi honey.

I'm so very sorry for your loss.

I know how you feel. I was 7 weeks pregnant when I started bleeding on Tuesday last week and had my bloods taken that showed really low HCG levels, then on Friday I had a scan and there was nothing there and my HCG levels were even lower. I now have negative pregnancy test 2/3 days later.

I want to be pregnant again more than anything but the TTC road ahead now seems even more difficult plus if I do get my BFP again I'll be so scared that it's going to happen to me again.

I have bought some OPKs to monitor my cycle before my first AF in the hopes we can catch super quick but even the thought of DTD right now feels weird because I am still in a bad place with the MC being so recent.

However I want a baby more than I am scared or worried and it's worth all the risk of going through the pain of a MC again, if (and the odds are in our favour) the next BFP is a sticky little bean. We will get there and you can do this!

@Bl0ndi3 thank you so much for sharing and sorry for your loss.

I hope it doesn't take too long for either of us to get another bfp with a sticky bean

Sending you lots of rainbow 🌈 dust and big hugs

Hi @BabyDust13 ...i have a similar experience like @Bl0ndi3 ..2 weeks back i started heavily bleeding in my 7th week (just a day before viability scan) post my 3 ivf FET cycle for first child. Scan showed nothing and HCG was on lower side in 7 week range,. Had all symptoms too ! Clinic confirmed its an early m/c..this was my 3rd cycle where i saw a BFP atleast.. had 2 failed with BFN and a fresh cycle which had to be cancelled due to OHSS. I feel last 2 years of my life are just wasted with ivf and i have reached no where. I have unexplained infertility so really have no issue known to fix which is adding to frustration. My entire life is around planning ivf cycles.. holiday, work location for easy commute ! I just feel life is so unfair to some 😣

@duckhouse sorry to hear your going through such a tough time.

I have no idea where my cycles at still haven't had a period since the d&c.

I'm really trying to be more relaxed about the whole process but it's so difficult when you want something so bad and it isn't working the way it should

I wish you all the luck 🌈

@BabyDust13 so sorry to hear what you've gone through.
I've recently experienced a missed miscarriage in my first pregnancy. 8 week scan showed little egg had stopped growing at around 6 weeks. I had to have medical management but it didn't work first time round. Had to try the medication again but still absolutely nothing so the hospital have booked me in for an MVA tomorrow, not offering D&C due to covid. Dreading being awake for it.

Its been very drawn out and hoping tomorrow will give me some closure on the physical side of things. In my head I think I want to start TTC as soon as we can to try think positive and give myself a focus but I am petrified too of having to go through this ordeal again. Even if we did fall pregnant again theres always going to be that anxiety lingering, so I understand exactly how you feel and its so cruel we've had to go through it 😫 Try to think positive, you got pregnant before you will get pregnant again 💕

If you're in to your supplements etc... Read the link below. My sister told me about it and two of her friends who have been TTC for over a year fell pregnant after 4-6 weeks of taking these supplements, the DHA and COQ10. I've ordered them just to give me some focus plus i'll try anything if it might help.

www.luisazissman.co.uk/?p=647

@neb91 aw sorry to hear you're going through this awful loss as well

I hope it all goes well for you and you start feeling ready to try again soon

I will be super anxious next time I get a bfp but I'm just trying to remember that every pregnancy is different and just because it happened once doesn't mean it will happen again

I did start another post about people's success stories after miscarriage which was nice to read and made me think a bit more positive I'll try and find the link for you if you fancy a read

Thanks for the supplement info 🙂

@neb91

Happy endings after miscarriage www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/3988023-happy-endings-after-miscarriage

I’m so sorry for your loss. I had an ectopic pregnancy just over a week ago and know what you mean re trying again. Part of me wonders if it’s just best not to bother. It’s so heart wrenching.

Just wishing you well OP and others. I had a MC earlier this year and it really hurt and continues to, though things are slowly feeling better. Take your time, feel whatever you need to feel x

@EssentialHummus @ZigZagPlant sorry for your losses

I have thought about it lots and we are thinking positive and moving forward I feel like when it finally happens all the good that comes with it will put weigh the bad

Good luck to you both

Good luck OP. Wishing you lots of baby dust.

Thanks for the link, I'll have a read. And you're right, its always going to be different. Just because its happened once doesnt mean its inevitably going to happen again. Hope you start to feel better each day and good luck! 💕💙

I hope this helps you to know - but before my ectopic I had a little boy. Complete textbook pregnancy. So just goes to show how no two pregnancies are the same. Just like people every baby we carry is individual. So each one is a fresh start.

@ZigZagPlant thank you 🥰

@BabyDust I'm so sorry to hear this. It can be incredibly distressing finding out you have miscarried and then knowing when to try again.

To offer you some hope this is my story: the first time I ever hit pregnant I was so happy and then about 10 weeks in my symptoms went away. I was paranoid and went for a private scan only to be told the baby's heart had stopped at 9 weeks. I was devastated. I cried for weeks. The only way to heal myself it seemed was to try again as quick as possible. So I waited to have one normal period before trying again, fell pregnant straight away and she is currently a beautiful 10 year old girl who is lying on her bed writing stories.

It will get better xx

@indecisivewoman81 aw thank you for sharing it's nice to know there's lots of happy endings out there

I don't know if any of you still look at this thread but I got this yesterday.

Trying my best to stay calm yet positive as I know this is a new pregnancy and just because I had bad luck last time it doesn't mean this one won't work

@BabyDust13 congratulations.

I am waiting for my missed miscarriage to happen and saw your post just now. So pleased to hear you've had good news. Wishing you all the best for a happy and healthy pregnancy xx

@pingit I'm so sorry to hear that

Thank you for taking the time to reply 🥰