Sister's due date close to what mine was

[ProfInkly]

I found out today that my sister is 20 weeks pregnant and her due date is 3 weeks before mine was. I had a miscarriage at 9 weeks. We're not especially close and don't live near each other. We would usually see each other at family things a couple of times a year and keep in touch by text once a month or so. Because of covid and my mum having her own problems to deal with at the time I didn't tell anyone about my miscarriage so only my partner and close friend know. The news has really knocked me today and I've been in tears a few times but my partner is very matter of fact about things and doesn't understand why I'm so emotional. I'm so happy for her but it's brought it home that I should be starting to get a bump about now, and when the baby arrives I should have been having mine.
I can't decide whether to tell my mum that I was pregnant or not now. I have a 3 year old and a few people have asked when we will be having no. 2 which really winds me up. How do people deal with questions like this? I just tend to say something like 'this one keeps me busy enough' and try to change the subject.
Sorry this is a bit rambling. Just wanted somewhere to vent.

Hey, just wanted to say I'm sorry for your loss. The jealousy and hurt you feel is understandable especially as it's in the family. What would you gain from telling your mum? Being understood? Some empathy? Those could be good reasons to tell her. If she's not capable of that, you may wish to seek support elsewhere x

I saw this yesterday and I didn't know how to respond. Sorry for your loss OP.

I can see both sides: wanting support in your grief which you are absolutely entitled to. And giving your sister space to enjoy her news. Those things shouldn't be mutually exclusive. That said my SIL isn't speaking to a member of her family for this reason (her sister sadly miscarried) and it's all very painful for everyone. Maybe a quiet word to your mum?

I'm sorry and it's hard, I had several miscarriages and understand the pain.

Hope you're successful next time.

I'm sorry op. I have friends who have a very close due date to me ( it would have been next month and I've had two further miscarriages since). They don't understand why I don't want to hear about how hard it's been being pregnant and having a toddler and dealing with covid or the hot weather and whatever. I've had to cut them out for my own protection. I appreciate that's not as easy with a sister, but if you're not close maybe you could have a quiet word with your mum to explain why you need to keep your distance?

Thank you. Sorry to hear of your losses and struggles as well .
Feeling a little better about everything today. Had a chat with DP last night and I think he understands why I was so emotional yesterday now. I'm not going to tell my mum right away. When we are allowed to stay with family we will be going to visit and I might speak to her then. I don't think my mum or even my sister would be anything other than supportive but I don't want to interrupt the news of a new baby in the family at the moment.