Missed miscarriage

[Lori86]

Hi everyone, I'm back again after being told at my dating scan yesterday that there was no heartbeat. I'm just in shock, I had had a small bleed on Sunday night so I had a bad feeling but still was so hopeful. I was 12+5 but baby only measured 8+5. I'm going to epu at 10.30 to discuss options. I really don't know what to do for the best so I was hoping to get some advice or experience from ladies on here. I got great support during my last Mc in March but that was a totally different experience as it started naturally and was all over within 12 hours. I was 6 weeks gone then.
I've ruled out going completely naturally as I feel I need it to be over sooner so I can move on (I just fear my body would hold on for weeks upon weeks). I'm really torn between surgical management or medical. Part of me feels like I need to go through the actual miscarriage and feel the pain for some reason which I can't explain. But another part of me leans towards the surgery and just having it done. I was told by the consultant yesterday that both would be options. I'd really appreciate some input.

I'm
Sorry this is happened, exactly the same as me next week I opted for medical management. It was painful but surgical wasn't available due to covid unless an emergency x

Hope you start to feel better soon cx

So sorry for your loss.
I had medical management of a MMC two years ago, I waited a week to see if I would misscarry naturally, which I didn’t.
I was given the option of medical or surgical management, and chose medical management. I work in the hospital that I would of had the surgery in, so I wanted to avoid that if I could.
However I would want to avoid surgery if possible anyway, with the medical management, I was in at 0900 and out before lunch time.

Thanks for the advice ladies, I had my appointment on Tuesday and was advised that while they still do the surgery they would prefer to try the misoprostol first. I took the first dose on Tuesday & I only passed 2 small clots but had a lot of pain. I had another scan today which confirmed I haven't passed anything so took another dose at 11. I've been having very bad cramps since about 12 but only mild spotting. I'm afraid the 2nd dose has failed too, if it had worked should I already be bleeding?

Thankfully I have another appt on Monday & was told that I can either opt for a third dose or schedule surgery if no movement by then. I'm exhausted now and as awful as it sounds I just want it to be over, I have a toddler who needs his mammy back.

Hi Lovely,

When I had my pessisaries within a few hours I was bleeding heavily and in a lot of pain (my experience) x

I had a tablet 2 days before I went into my maternity unit for the rest of the medication (the first tablet was to prepare my body for the miscarriage, I can’t remember what they were called) , I only needed one lot of the other medication and then the pain really ramped up, I only started bleeding when everything came away. The pain was pretty freaking awful. Very similar to having my labour induced with my daughter. Everything came away in one lot and then I bled for at least 2 weeks after.

I hope things start to happen for you, it must be awful having it dragged out when you just want it to be over and done with.

@TTC1991 thank you. I took the tablets orally, I had read about them being given vaginally but apparently in my hospital they're given orally. I wonder if that affects the results.
Looks like I'll have to go cut the surgical option but I really wanted to avoid that.

@lori86 hi lovely. I’m so sorry about your loss. It really is heartbreaking and I hope you have a lot of support around. I have recently been through this, and I went for the medical management originally. I had two doses and neither worked. I only passed one small clot and barely any bleeding. I ended up having the surgery, which was scary at first but as soon as they give me the general anaesthetic it was absolutely fine. I’m still waiting for my period though and had it nearly 5 weeks ago so I’m worrying a little about that but I think/hope it’s normal xxx

@Lori86 I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I found out I’d had a MMC at the end of March and would have gone straight for the ERPC, however due to it being the height of Covid, they tried me on expectant management for three weeks, which didn’t work, then I had medical a week later, which failed (the sac had actually grown when I went for a scan the week after!) and (after pushing for it) I ended up having an MVA. I really didn’t want an MVA as I was so scared of the pain but it was honestly fine, over really quickly and not that painful at all, completely manageable. I’d say surgical is definitely a good option if you just want it over - I was the same after so much waiting and it was such a relief getting the surgery and knowing it was almost certainly going to be finished. I was in and out in a day (and that was longer than expected just because we were waiting for the doctor to be available).
Good luck with whatever you choose and if you have any questions at all, just ask - am happy to answer as best I can. Xx

Didnt want to read and run so just giving you my sympathies over 12 weeks is more than my 2x MC so i really feel for you.

I think youre smart to want it sorted quickly, theres no need to put yourself through more pain on purpose, youve done nothing wrong and deciding a route that is quicker will be much better for you mentally in the long run.

I wish i'd gone with some help with mine. I'm almost 3 weeks in now, constant pain, constant bleeding, cant catch my breath, sleeping 12hrs... i haven't given myself time to grieve because i feel so physically ill i cant handle it just now, so i'm 'shelving' it.

Let us know how you get on, lots of hugs