Natural miscarriage or D&C help

[Loudxb]

Hello, I had my first scan at 6 weeks and there was a heartbeat. I had very light spotting before 3 days and immediately went to see my doctor who confirmed my worst nightmare that there was no longer a heartbeat and baby was measuring 8/9 weeks only (I am now 12 weeks) She immediately suggested D&C, at this point I was very upset and had no knowledge of this so agreed. It was scheduled for tomorrow and I did all my bloods etc yesterday but after reading a lot of threads and getting advice from friends in the UK they have all questioned why I would get a D&C instead of waiting to see if I could miscarry naturally. This is something I would really prefer if safe and possible. I called my doctor today and asked her if I could leave it a while and come back for ultrasound to see if my mc is complete. She sounded quite reluctant and I’m unsure if this is as I’m in Dubai and self paying as even NHS website recommends natural?

My spotting started Sunday very lightly and has been slowly continuing and today I’m passing quite large jelly like clots and have very light periods cramps. Can anyone give some advice as I would like to let my body manage this naturally but I want to make sure it’s safe. At this stage how long roughly should I give myself? Do most people manage to miscarry naturally without having to get D&C later on? Is there any danger of still having the feutus inside me for this long after passing? (Sorry it’s so hard to word this nicely) any help would be greatly appreciated I just feel really lost.

Hi Loud, firstly so sorry that you're in this position. I'm sure others will be along to give their experience, but essentially what option you choose to manage your current circumstances is really down to you. Personally I went for surgical management because I wanted everything over quickly and to move on. Everyone will have individual reasons for their selection.

You're exactly right in that NICE (the UK's Health Institute) recommends expectant management (natural MC) as a first option if it's something the woman is comfortable with. There is nothing inherently dangerous about choosing/having a natural MC, although depending on individual circumstances, such as how far along you are in the pregnancy, health complications etc, you may end up having to explore other options - either by choice or on advice - if everything doesn't pass.

I can't comment as to why your medical professional advised you to go straight for surgical management if they haven't commented on any health reasons as to why that was recommended to you, but maybe that is more the norm in Dubai.

The Miscarriage Association has a really good leaflet here which explains the different choices and the pros/cons of each which might give you some more information in the meantime.

I hope someone is along soon to talk to give you some more specific commentary xx

I've always chosen to miscarry naturally at home (5 between 7 weeks and 12). I just prefer to be in my own home where I can take as many baths as I want or just cry in bed.
With my 12 week miscarriage from when I started passing small clots it was 5 days before the full miscarriage happened. Not going to lie it wasn't pleasant and it was painful as you experience contractions to open the cervix to get everything out. Mine was over within 12 hours. I had my mum with me. At one point I was filling a pad every 15-20 mins or so - I still stayed home as at that point sitting in a&e running to the loo to pass fist size clots was going to make the whole especially worse. Take lots of warm baths and have the paracetamol with codeine tablets on hand. I used to sleep with a towel under me at night as was paranoid I'd wake up covered in blood. The worst of it was probably over in 1hr to 90 mins. Once the sac was out it was largely over and I just had heavy period type bleeding for a couple of days after x

I chose to have a medically induced miscarriage with Misoprostol because of everything that’s happening. I wasn’t offered a proper D&C. Would that be an option instead of waiting? I knew I couldn’t. I wanted it over quickly.

I went for surgery because I wanted the safety of knowing where and when and my mental health would have suffered if I had waited. I also just didn’t know what I would have done with the remains. This way I asked the hospital to dispose of them sensitively. It also allowed me to have genetic testing to see if there is a reason why it happened.

The surgery was only a couple of days ago. I don’t know which route is better but I don’t regret the route I chose - I think it is an incredibly personal choice and we are all brave regardless of which way we go x

I’ve had both, I’d choose D&C if it was to happen again. I really struggled with the length of time the natural way took. I was prepared for a day or two not several, I really feel like it effected my mental health at the time. Where as the D&C was just that day.
No one way is right or wrong, choose what u feel is best
So sorry for your loss OP.

Thank you everyone for your kind words and advice, it’s so good to hear from other people who have experienced the same. Thank you for using your experience to help ❤️

I had a miscarriage 5 weeks ago, I was measuring 7 weeks. I started very lightly spotting over the weekend, then went for a scan on the Tuesday and was told the news. That night I had red blood but it was on and off for a few days. It properly started on the Friday afternoon. I’m not going to lie, when passing the pregnancy tissue I had labour contractions and it was really painful, pain killers did nothing. I had 3 phases of this lasting around 3 hours for each, one on Friday afternoon, Saturday night and Sunday afternoon. Once the tissue was passed it was like a period and the bleeding tailed off.
I’ve since done a test and it’s come back negative so luckily I passed everything. Given the choice again I don’t think it would do it naturally. However my SIL said her miscarriage was just like a painful period, nothing like labour contractions so I think it’s different for everyone. I hope you are ok x

How are you doing OP? I've had two previous losses and they were spontaneous. The first was pretty mild -more like a painful period, that was 9 weeks but measuring 6. The second was harder but fast, only one evening but quite painful contractions. I was 11 weeks the second time and baby was the correct size so that affected it.

I'm now waiting to miscarry again, baby is 8/9 weeks and I'm the same date but no heart beat. I refused a D&C last week but I'm tired of the nausea and the waiting so I booked a D&C for this Friday. Best of luck to you my dear x