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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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Original poster

Re: Medical management of missed miscarriage - what to expect?

26 replies

p2b · 14/09/2007 15:12

Hi

I posted on Wednesday (please see below) when my 20 week scan revealed that I had miscarried at approx 14 weeks. Many thanks for all those that replied. Unfortunately when I turned up for my D&C this morning I was told the baby was too big to have this procedure and that I should have been told that I would have to take tablets to medically manage the miscarriage. I have to go back tomorrow for the first tablet and then back on Monday for the second round of tablets, staying at the ward until the baby has passed. I would be grateful to hear how others have got through this and would appreciate if anyone feels able to share what I should expect. It just seems like the nightmare continues....

Thanks
S

**

Hi

Just posting cause I think it might help to find out how others have dealt with this news. I had my 20 scan (with my first pregnancy) this morning to be told that no heartbeat could be found. When pressed the sonographer took measurements that put the baby at about 14 weeks when it died. I heard the heart beat with the midwife at 15 weeks so I guess it wasn't growing properly?? I have opted for a D&C which will hopefully happen on Friday - if they get a slot - it's not a set appointment.

My partner and I are keen for tests to be done to see if we can establish why this may have happened. I realise that relatively speaking this loss was fairly early on in the pregnancy but I think that getting to the 20 week mark and then finding out makes it feel as it it was further along. Especially as the miscarriage stats dramatically drop when you get past 13 weeks.

I did experience some slight bleeding at around 10 weeks and had an early scan which said everything was okay. Becuase I had this scan I was not entitled to the 12 week one too. I also had another slight bleed at 14 weeks and heard the heartbeat which I then heard again at my midwife appointment at 15 weeks.

I would be intersted to hear how others have dealt with this kind of news and any advice or guidance on what I should expect from the D&C and the next few weeks. At the moment I just feel that I have some many questions and no answers. I also feel odd because since I found out I was pregnant I was convinced something would go wrong. To get this far and then have my worse fears confimed feels very harsh.

Thanks for reading
S

OP posts:
whoops · 14/09/2007 15:14

{{{HUGS}}}
Sorry to hear this and hope someone will come along soon to help

TheMadHouse · 14/09/2007 15:17

Hello

I had a medical management for a miscarrage at 13 weeks 7 weeks ago and the actual event was not too bad regarding the pain.

I had tummy cramps like a bad period, however, had passed both the baby and the placenta by 10.30. I had the pessory at 7.30. There is a lot of product and you really need a lot of pads and change of clothes etc, as you are encoraged to walk around as it makes things happen quicker.

Mentally it was a very traumatic experiance that I could not ever repreat, but I have been blessed with 2 healthy boys, so wil not be attempting to have another baby.

I can give you more information if you wish, let me know. I am so sorry for your loss.

curiouscat · 14/09/2007 15:23

Just to say sorry for your loss.

Neverenoughhandbags · 14/09/2007 15:23

p2b, I'm so sorry this has happened. I hope you get some answers.

ejt1764 · 14/09/2007 15:25

p2b - so sorry for your loss. I lost 2 babies last year, and have been there - and yes, it is a nightmare when things don't go to plan (talking of your D&C). I had a medical management for my 2nd MC and if I lost another one I would go the same way.

The tablet you take tomorrow won't actually do anything. It just stops you body producing progesterone. You may feel a bit sick after you have taken it.

On Monday when you go in, they will give you a pessary first, then more tablets at regular intervals. The tablets are basically to induce labour. You will get cramps, and labour-type pains, and you will start to bleed. then, eventually, you will deliver the baby. If you want to, you should ask about having a funeral service for your baby. You may also want to ask for a post-mortem to find out what happened to your baby. There is more information here

I coped with it by talking about it - to the miscarriage association and by posting on the forum of babyloss. I also had counselling offered by the midwife counselling service at my hospital - your hospital should have such a service too, and you can usually self-refer. You cope with it as you cope with any other bereavement.

I wish you all the best, and will be thinking about you on Monday. Take care, and heal.

Original poster
p2b · 14/09/2007 15:30

Many thanks to all for the replies so far. The Madhouse, I am very sorry that you have had to go through this too but I do thank you for your frankness. I just think that it might help to know what to expect so that I can at least attempt to prepare myself.

Thanks again
S

OP posts:
TheMadHouse · 14/09/2007 15:32

I wish I had known what to expect, it came as such a shock to me. I previously had 2 D&C's for previous losses and was not expecting this.

I truly am sorry for your loss and will be thinking of you.

Original poster
p2b · 14/09/2007 15:37

ejt1764

Many thanks for your message.

OP posts:
positive · 16/09/2007 11:30

hi p2b

i had a mmc at 19 wks 18mths ago. i started to bleed on a friday evening, went to hosp for an emg scan and was told baby had died at around 12 wks. sent home and told to come back the next morning with an overnight bag packed. was told if the bleeding got alot worse or started getting pains to go back to hosp asap.
when i was admitted on the sat morning i was told that i would have 5 cycles of medication 4hrs apart, the first was a pessary and the others oral. as this was my first preg/delivery my mw explained that the medications may not always work the first day - but this is rare.
I started the meds at 1100 and delivered at 1930.
will be honest, you will have contractions, mine werent too bad but dont be afraid to ask for pain relief, i was lucky as the mw was great and i was given pain relief as soon as i said i was getting pains.
unfortunatley i had a retained placenta, the meds i was given to help this along didnt work with me and as i had a v heavy bleed i had to have a d&c. I had the choice of an epidural or to be knocked out, i chose to be knocked out - didnt want to hear anything when i was in theatres.
my DH and i were also given a choice of having baby cremated or to have a funeral afterwards. have to say this did help us in getting over our loss.

sorry if this is TMI but its my experience.

will be thinking about you tomorrow

Original poster
p2b · 16/09/2007 13:18

Positive

Very sorry to hear about your loss but many thanks for your reply.

OP posts:
Jackstini · 16/09/2007 21:45

p2b - just wanted to say I will be thinking about you tomorrow. Hope it goes as ok as it can do and you and dp take time to grieve and be looked after

MillyMollyAngel · 16/09/2007 21:49

So sorry to hear about whats happened to you P2B. I had medically managed mc at 12 weeks (baby died at 9wks). I guess at time I was just in total shock and didn't fully realise what I was going to experience. Mc began when I was at home (was given tablet then told to return 48hrs later for pessary) Just wanted to mention this, so you can be aware that mc may begin before you return to hospital for pessary. I naively didn't realise this could happen and found experience v. traumatic. Just assumed things would happen after pessary was given. Pain wise, I did need pain relief when contractions came and as mentioned before try and stay mobile. Found that this really did help. Hope that everything goes OK for you tomorrow. Take care.

iliketosleep · 17/09/2007 11:03

high im really sorry to put an even bigger pressure on your situation but i had medical management on monday and ended up loosing naturally on tuesday and it was a horrible experience but dont be too scared everyone is different

MrsThreads · 17/09/2007 14:36

Hi there

I am so sorry you have gone through this.

I have just had an mmc at 10 weeks but the little one had only lasted til about 9 weeks as I had a scan at 8 weeks and there was a heartbeat so something went wrong in last few days.

WE found out last Friday and I have been booked for an ERPC on Wednesday but I think I lost him/her naturally yesterday afternoon down the loo and I was too distressed to retrieve as I wanted the operation for this reason.

The nurse at EPAU has told me to go to hospital as planned on Wednesday and they will do a scan to see whether there is anything left and if not I can go home and if there is I will have the op.

As this is our 3rd failed pregnancy in 9 months: ectopic last December, miscarriage at nearly 5 weeks in May and now this, we have been told we will leave the hospital on Wednesday with an appointment to have some tests done to find out why this is happening to us.

Hope you feel better soon and hope you get through this experience OK.

xxx

spugs · 17/09/2007 16:02

im sorry to hear this hun, i had medical management for a mc at 6 and a half weeks so quite a bit earlier then you. the first tablet actually made me start bleeding but they did tell me that this sometimes happens. in hospital i had the tablets and i had what felt like mild contractions. the pain was not to bad and the bleeding wasnt particularly heavy. i know that they will give you pain relief up to and including morphine if you need it. they never found the baby and as it would have been so small i think unfortunatly it might have gone down the loo. they do make you use a pan on the toilet but a couple of times i didnt as i found the tablets gave me the runs badly.

i know a friend who had medical management at 16 weeks and apart from the emotional aspect found it bearable. she was able to see and hold her babies and have photos. she did have pain relif but everyones different.

i hope everything goes well for you x

iliketosleep · 17/09/2007 16:04

mrs threads i was in pretty much a similar situation, I had a small bleed on friday was scanned on the monday and all was great then bled again on wednesday and had a scan on thursday which revieled baby was dead and only measured 10+1, i was supposed to be 10+4

daisyandbabybootoo · 17/09/2007 16:15

p2b, I'm so so sorry to read about your mmc. It is terribly hard no matter what stage of the pregnancy you are at.

I've had 2 spontaneous and complete MCs so no personal experience of medical management, but just wanted to send you some virtual hugs.

I've just realised that you have gone in today for the second tablets. I hope that you are OK and that the staff have been thoughful and kind. Take things easy and be kind to yourself.

hugs

Daisy xx

spugs · 18/09/2007 09:17

hope yesterday went ok xx

positive · 18/09/2007 09:41

p2b,
hope yesterday went ok and hopefully you are back home already
xx

Original poster
p2b · 18/09/2007 13:30

Hi

Just to say thanks so much for all the messages and for the frankness with which you have all spoken. I came home this morning after a rather traumatic 24 hours, taking the full four doses of tablets, but I am at least relieved that the pregnancy has eventually passed. I am happy to share how this happened for me if it would help anyone. I personally found knowing what to expect somewhat comforting and was empowered by this knowledge. My husband and I have opted for a post mortem to be done and have given bloods for several different tests. These may reveal some answers to our many questions but we are also aware that they may not.
Many thanks again.
Sx

OP posts:
orangehead · 18/09/2007 22:26

Im so sorry, sending u hugs. hope u ok

Jackstini · 18/09/2007 22:30

Hi P2B - glad this part is over for you and you found it a bit easier to cope with the knowledge & support. Keep posting if you want to share further and will keep my fingers crossed you have the chance of some answers.

Neverenough · 18/09/2007 22:35

p2b, I'm glad you have got this far and send you my sympathy and support.I hope the hospital staff treated you sensitively and I'm glad that you were offered tests.

missstar · 18/10/2007 11:53

Hi i feel abit silly ending this message n im abit mixed up, i came back from my holiday fri n i did a pregnancy test sat as i felt abit strange on holiday i have 2 sns already but the test was positive i could obly be about 4 weeks i was shocked n was feeling very sick n weak i did another test the next day it came up negative then another 2 monday n 2 more tuesday the doctor said i had misscarried early n now i am bleedin heavy clot i feel so lost n sick n low i know i am only early but is this a natural birth n i wont need a d&c will i have to go back to the doctors monday, sorry if this sounds silly but i am so shocked, confused n sad all at once

JackOLANTERNstini · 19/10/2007 11:34

Hi Missstar, sorry you are going through this. Were the tests on Mon/Tues also negative? If so it does sound like you are having an early miscarriage.
You can call your local hospital and ask to speak to the EPU (early pregnancy unit) for more advice and information.
I hope the physical part of this passes quickly for you, how are you feeling emotionally? Were you planning to have another?