Surgical management during COVID-19

[terrified2020]

Hi all, firstly sorry to everyone who is posting on this board - it's awful to be in this position.

So, this was my first pregnancy and unfortunately I found out yesterday that the baby no longer has a HB. In a nutshell, I've had bleeding on and off throughout this which triggered several visits to my EPU. Yesterday (Saturday) I was 9w5 and had just had a successful scan at the EPU on the Tuesday. Unfortunately I had an extremely heavy bleed on Friday, and with the EPU being closed for the BH, we went for a private scan which confirmed no HB.

However, they said they also potentially saw a partial molar pregnancy, so I had to go immediately into A&E. They took bloods and conducted an internal exam (cervix closed) but because I wasn't bleeding lots at the time, they said I had to wait until Tuesday when EPU will be open and they can scan again/confirm themselves.

Anyway, I am extremely worried and scared that because of COVID I will not be offered surgical management (D&C) which is what I want. I have read horror stories about the suffering people go through when miscarrying at home, and I am terrified.

I know that if a partial molar is confirmed I think there might be some exceptions because of this being a pre-cancerous condition, but I'm just so worried about not being able to have a D&C. I just want this over with.

Can anyone confirm that they've still been offered surgical management during this time? I appreciate all the Trusts will be different, but it would ease my mind a little to know that it is still a potential option.

Just to say I'm thinking of you still - I really hope all is well, and that everything gets resolved for you today. I'll check back tomorrow xx

Thank you. I’ve just got home. Nothing happened in the hospital, except some eve so slight bleeding, so I’m to wait it out a week now in the hope that it all does as it’s meant to and then go back for another scan. I just cannot believe how long this is dragging on for - it’s been almost a month since we found our baby had gone and it had gone three weeks before that! I just want it done now.

I’m feeling rotten though, was really violently sick a couple of times and am on so many medicines now. Barely have the energy to speak!

Morning, I'm really sorry to hear that nothing happened yesterday and on top of that, that you left not feeling so good. I know this must just be a horrible situation for you atm to have to continue to wait. I sincerely hope that something will start to happen soon (if it didn't overnight) and that you can begin to move on.

Just trying to think of the 'positives' right now (although that term really isn't appropriate with everything related to having to go through this being on a sliding scale of crap) - that's really good that your next fixed point in time is a scan. That way, if something has/does happen between now and then, you can have reassurance that everything has 'gone'. If not, then they'd surely have to offer you SM by that point...?

I really hope you don't find the above offensive; the whole thing is awful, but something that helped me was trying to find the tiny bits I could grab onto and reframe in an affirmative way. I'm sure your mum and husband are providing great support to you too.

I'm just so sorry you're having to go through all of this - I keep talking with my husband about you and we just send you all of our love and best wishes right now xx

That’s so sweet, thank you! It’s been really nice having someone to talk to that’s been through similar and knows the emotions behind it - as much as my mum and husband are amazing, they can’t quite grasp how it feels for me, just as I can’t for them.

Still nothing overnight, I’ve resigned myself to the fact that it’s not going to happen this week so next week I’m going to really, really push for surgical - I asked at my appt on Sat what would happen if it didn’t work this time and they said they’d likely try medical another one or two times but I just really don’t want that. I also have private healthcare with work so may try that if they’re not budging. I’m doing ok both mentally and physically today, just frustrated more than anything. Like you say, trying to cling on to the positives and also chuckling at the fact that baby obviously took after me as I’m really stubborn and it seems my pregnancy is too!

You're more than welcome . That's good that you have the private healthcare option - there was another lady who I believe was in a similar situation to you re. only being offered MM on NHS. She (@Ranoutofgoodnames) had surgery under her private workplace insurance over the weekend, and has just posted again today.

I'm really glad to hear that you're doing OK - I'd definitely be proud of my cervix etc, it sounds as if it really wants to hold onto things which is exactly what you want in more positive circumstances!

I will keep my fingers crossed for you and check back soon - if you need anything or just want to chat, please send me a PM or just post here xx

Ooh that’s good to know about the private healthcare - I was a bit worried that maybe they wouldn’t be offering it either as I know they’re doing reduced services at the moment with them helping out the NHS. I’ll have a look for her post, thank you.

Yes, my best friend keeps telling me that the fact it’s sticking seems a really good thing, too, so I’ll try to focus on that rather than being annoyed by it - I’ll (hopefully) be glad of it in the future 💕

Thank you again for being so kind xx

No problem at all! Her posts were [https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/3882660-Sad-news-today here] and [https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/3887570-Pain-after-surgery here] if that helps xx

Urgh, sorry I missed the extra bracket, but you see what I'm getting at!

Thank you xxx

@SkyBlue20 Thanks for your comments yesterday, I’ve just been reading this thread.
If you don’t mind me asking how many weeks were you as they have offered you a second round of pills? My baby died at 9 weeks, and would have been 16 weeks yesterday.

Had the pills this morn at 11.30 ish, they did start working within 2, but bleeding has all but stopped, though pain is still constant. Awake at this stupid hour as woke up at 2, couldn’t get back to sleep with the pain, so had to get pain relief. Don’t want to scare anyone else reading, it’s manageable pain, just obviously painful.

They have told me they don’t give a second dose of pills before 12 weeks? The consultant is coming to review in the morn, but they have already indicated that the likely solution would be to ask me to go home and take a test in 3 weeks, with something obviously happening or not happening in the meantime. If it hasn’t come out after 7 weeks of being in there, and with pills, don’t see how it will in next 3 weeks. And 3 weeks is taking the absolute piss. That’s not living, I can’t get closure and start to move on, it’s barely existing, while having to entertain a 7 year old all day like nothing is wrong. And potentially still in pain. In hospital they can obvs give something stronger, but I’m going to tell consultant that as I need it topped up every 4 hours, I don’t care if I exceed the max dosage, I will continue to take it as i need it, especially as I need to look after my daughter. If they don’t like it, they need to find another solution. When I say pain is bearable now, it’s only that way as I thought it was the beginning to an end, not something that can be sustained for days / weeks on end.

I just want the op and I want an end to all of this. It’s spinning me out, hence my ranting, and hopefully I’m worrying for nothing, just can’t see them fixing it.

Best try and sleep now as I reckon I’m only on about 4 hours total over last 2 nights.

I know I’m fortunate that corona hasn’t affected me or my family illness-wise, but I can’t believe all this is happening, it’s just a total nightmare.

@amyspames I’m right there with you - baby died at 9weeks, I would have been 16weeks tomorrow.
Interesting they said that about the second round - in quite a casual convo before I had the first lot, my doc said they’d likely try medical two or three times before moving on to other options. But tbh it was a very informal chat about it and processes seem to change depending who you’re talking to at my hospital - it’s been ridiculous from start to finish. I’m like you, I cannot continue to wait, it’s been so long already, it clearly doesn’t want to happen!

As a PP mentioned, BPAS May be able to take on your treatment on their behalf and I think it’s free:

www.bpas.org/more-services-information/miscarriage-care/

That might definitely be an option for me depending on what they say on Monday.

So sorry to hear you’re in pain, hope you managed to get a bit of sleep at least last night.

Sounds like we’re in a similar situation in terms of having to do all of the waiting so please do let me know how you get on. Sending love xx

Also, should mention, a nurse told me on Monday that I could take paracetamol, codeine and ibuprofen at the same time, so double check that with a pharmacist or someone but that could be an option if you need more pain relief (obviously you can do cocodamol instead of the codeine and paracetamol) xx

@tryingtimes2020

Sorry my phone is playing up.

That was supposed to say thank you so much @tryingtimes20 for your detailed account. I've been looking everywhere for info as in booked in tomorrow and this really helps.