Coping with the idea of two possible miscarriages
HeadAboveWater96 · 27/01/2020 00:09
I've had two instances in my life that have scared me quite a bit and made me question if I miscarried, but I don't want to jump to conclusions. Both times, I was not looking to get pregnant, and it came as a complete shock. The experiences began with such awful and intense cramping that I could barely walk or stand and would even induce vomiting. I tried not to worry, but then came the real concerning part. Both times, I was standing up when suddenly I felt like I'd just wet myself. However, it turned out to be very intense gushes of blood. The cramping and bleeding continued, and I'd be passing lots of large, dark clots, which is definitely not normal for me to have just on a period alone. The second time this happened, I actually asked my doctor what she thought, and she herself said it sounded like I could've miscarried but since it happened about 1 month prior to our appointment an ultrasound would be virtually useless. I've had vaginal ultrasounds, pap smears, and general vaginal exams, and there's nothing out of the ordinary at all. This is also part of the reason why I've been so worried about it; if I had a diagnosable internal problem, I wouldn't even be still thinking about these experiences now.
I still think back to these experiences and wonder what the Hell happened. I guess I just felt like venting somewhere safe and would be curious as to hear what others who've miscarried or had scares have to say and how they've coped. I just want answers and some peace of mind /: I've avoided sex and even had an IUD put in out of fear of this happening again. That second experience really got to me. It was painful and awful. Sometimes I cry remembering what happened and just want to cope with the fact that this could've been a reality. Even if I didn't want to be pregnant, the idea of miscarrying is really upsetting. I just don't want to end up being dramatic and making a big deal out of nothing.
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