Hi everyone,
First time poster here but please bear with me.
After 18 months of trying for our second child, it was confirmed back on the 22nd October that our baby had died at 7+4. It was a missed miscarriage as I was 11 weeks before I had any signs. I then had a medical miscarriage at home on the 24th October which was horrific and a scan a week later which confirmed the pregnancy sac was gone but there was still a lot of tissue and that this would pass in the next few weeks. Hospital pregnancy test showed as negative on the 11th November, bleeding was minor so we thought we would just get started again! Few days later, bleeding started again and eventually called the EPU on Monday who told me to come in for another scan. Scan showed that my uterus lining was still thick but couldn't see if it was a blood clot or pregnancy tissue. They advised an erpc as it was 5 weeks since the miscarriage started and this was done on Friday. Again, another horrible experience but physically, better than the medical management but just feel like I am back a square 1.
I thought the erpc would clear everything but the more I read (and I know I shouldn't) the more I see that it doesn't always work, infection is highly possible and it can take a really long time for everything to settle down again. I'm so terrified this hasnt worked and I am feeling like I am grieving all over again. The bleeding has already stopped when I was expecting it to last for a week at least. To say my anxiety is through the roof is an understatement!
I feel incredibly selfish feeling like this. I have a wonderful 3 year old who is my world and I know this is so much more already than other people have. Yet I cannot help but feel incredibly sad about our baby and the absolute fear that we will not be able to conceive again.
Has anyone got any advice or any positive/negative stories? I am so sorry for the epic post - we didn't tell anyone we were expecting so feel so alone as I havent spoken to anyone apart from DH about this.