Scan tomorrow to confirm MC

[nicola18737]

I thought I was fine. I was managing well and looking forwards to trying again but I'm actually dreading the sonographer giving me the awful news tomorrow.

I don't want to go, it feels like if I don't go then I'll still be pregnant 😢.

I'm taking my little boy to see In The Night Garden love afterwards so I hope I am ok.

So sorry for your loss. The mind works in mysterious ways but I totally understand not believing it until it's agreed in concrete by a scan. Sending hugs

Hi Nicola, I am so sorry to hear your news. I had my scan today at just gone 6 wks and I knew it was a mc despite my bf trying to convince me otherwise. Whilst it was still awful at least you do get some closure on the situation x

Even though closure may not be what you want I totally get it. Good luck I really hope it’s not too hard x

Thanks @babasaclover

Oh I'm so sorry you are going through this too @Rainbowbluebell. It must have been awful hearing those words.

I keep telling myself though that it wouldn't have been right as the baby would have been severely disabled - as that is why most miscarriages happen. So I'm trying to be grateful to my body for saying "nope, let's try again, this one didn't work".

I guess you're right, at least I'll have closure tomorrow and can start to move on. How are you feeling?

Oh I'm so sorry. I miscarried many years ago... Looking back I found walking into the scan knowing what they were going to say (& feeling sorry for lady that had to tell me) the hardest part too having been relatively matter of fact about it earlier.
Your hormones and emotions will be all over the place I'm sure which never helps. I hope tomorrow isn't too bad... Big hug from your little boy

Thanks Nicola, I had to end a pregnancy at 14 weeks in March as it had a very rare genetic abnormality. This was our first attempt since then and as I am 40 really panicking about time so we are gutted tbh but as you say it is natures way but it still feels like a major loss. Feeling ok physically and starting the grieving process now which will allow me to move on. I am glad it didn’t continue longer if it would have been unwell or in pain but just can’t help but think of what could have been.
Do you have an apptment or is it a walk in scan? I really hope it isn’t too hard for you X

Sorry wasn’t genetic was a Fetal abnormality. Bit tired today! X

I understand @Rainbowbluebell , it's the lost dream. Grieving over what might have been.

I am 40 in January so I feel the same, I'm worrying about time running out.

It must have been heartbreaking getting to 12 weeks and having that news. I'm so sorry. Now this, you've had terrible luck.

It's a scan that has been booked when I went to a&e. It's at 9:20. My husband is able to come with me now. I thought I was going to be fine but I've realised I do need him.

Are you going to wait until you've had your period before trying again?

Sending you a virtual hug. Thank goodness for this board, it's been brilliant for me being able to chat with other people going through the same. I don't feel so alone.

Thanks so much nicola18737, I really hope it’s ok today. I definitely thinks it’s best your DH is with you. Wishing you all the best and a virtual hug too. It really is a difficult time x

Last may I went to out of ours gp as was 12+2 and bleeding. Sent me to get an early scan, was told couldn't find Hb and was measuring 6 weeks. Wait a week and come back. I knew my dates were right and the pain I felt was like nothing I could ever describe.

The week wait (wanted to check for any change) was the worst week of my life. When I went to be re-scanned , nothing had changed. So we spoke about options and I decided to have a D&C. I then had to wait another week for that and felt entirely numb.

You will find closure, and you will feel nervous about trying again. People you meet, if you chose to tell them will tell you oh it's only early, it was barely even... And that offended and upset me tremendously.

Please don't feel you have to diminish or minimise your feelings. It's ok and normal to grieve. I am so so sorry you are going through this.

Please just have hope that there is light at the end of the tunnel. I am now 40+2 with my first and feel very blessed.

All the best to you. X

So I've been for the scan and they've said the sac is sat on my cervix. I haven't actually miscarried yet. I've been advised not to take my little boy to the show today as they said I may start heamoraging and have bad pain.

They tried to remove it manually but my womb is closed. I just want this to be over.

Oh darling. I am so sorry to hear this. Take some paracetamol in preparation and get it into your system.

Maybe snuggle with the boy on the sofa this afternoon and watch a film?

Thank you @Snowflake9 . My Mum has taken him to see it instead.

I just reread your story. It's heartbreaking. I know what you mean, it's the waiting. The endless waiting. The quiet hope you're trying to quash with reality but secretly clinging on to.

The worst time of my life had been waiting to find out the result of a private Down syndrome test we had done when I was assessed of having a 1 in 21 chance. This has by far beaten that though in terms of anxiety and sheer emotional turmoil and devastation.

I'm glad your story had a happy ending. Good luck with the birth, it's going to be any day now! My waters broke at 40 + 4.

Oh that’s awful for you Nicola that sounds just heartbreaking. I feel for you so much. That’s almost worse waiting thats so hard. I know it sounds strange but mild exercise brought mine on quicker even though it was blimmin awful. Rubbish tv and lots of tlc is definitely required. Is there nothing more they can do? That seems so cruel. Massive virtual hugs to you xx

OP I had this happen to me less than two weeks ago. I was 8 weeks pg. The pain and bleeding were less bad than I had feared and I passed the sac naturally at home. When I had the third scan confirming that it had passed I felt such relief. You can get through this. Give your little boy a massive squeeze and a big kiss

When I get home I can post a longer message and I'm happy to answer any questions you have If that would help. My mc was only about 10 days ago so it's all very fresh in my mind. I've already stopped bleeding & feel almost normal already. Hang in there.

@Rainbowbluebell Thank you for your kind words. It does feel so cruel. I've been heavily bleeding since Sunday. I thought the worst was over. Turns out it is yet to come. They said they want to see if it will pass naturally. If it hasn't within a week then they will do something to get it out.

I'm just laid on the sofa watching Working Moms on Netflix, willing it to happen.

Thank you @Rubicon80. I'm so sorry you've gone through this too. Did you also get told it was sitting on your cervix and hadn't gone through yet?

I'm so glad you are getting back to normal again. I have started dieting to get back some control in my life. I only want to lose 5lbs but it least gives me control and focus.

God you poor thing. Sorry didn’t realise you were bleeding heavily hopefully it will be over soon but that doesn’t make it easier. Lots of Netflix and cuddles. I really hope it doesn’t take too long and as suggested already dose up on paracetamol. Dont know if it helps but I had my mc on Monday afternoon and starting to get back to normal so it will get better I promise! Sending best wishes x

@nicola18737

Thank you @Rubicon80. I'm so sorry you've gone through this too. Did you also get told it was sitting on your cervix and hadn't gone through yet?

Basically I started bleeding lightly on the Friday. I'd already had cramps earlier that day so I suspected it was the start of a mc. I continued bleeding throughout Sat/Sun.

On the Monday I went to the EPU and they scanned me. At that point the pregnancy was still viable (still in place, with a heartbeat, cervix closed) but she said it looked like a 5-6 week pregnancy and I knew I was at least a week or more beyond that, so I knew it wasn't progressing properly.

The gynaecologist said she thought it wasn't a viable pregnancy and would miscarry but she couldn't say when or how long it would take.

I was due to go back for a follow up scan a week later (the following Monday). But on the Friday afternoon I started to cramp more badly, bleed really heavily and to regularly go to the loo and lose large clots etc. (Sorry if TMI). I think I actually miscarried the pregnancy on the Fri night/Sat morning.

On Sunday I went to A&E (because I was getting extremely anaemic and needed to check my blood levels) and had another scan and at that point the dr confirmed that I had indeed miscarried naturally. The pregnancy sac had gone and there was nothing left except a bit of blood and tissue.

So the whole thing, from the very first bleeding to confirmation that it had ended, was about 9 days. I then bled lightly for about another week, and it's now stopped.

Although it was sad news, the moment the dr confirmed that the miscarriage had happened, I actually felt like a big weight had been lifted- it was the uncertainty and the not knowing how long I might carry on bleeding, cramping etc. that was the hardest thing for me.

I really hope for your sake that it all happens naturally, soon. Honestly the pain and bleeding wasn't that bad at all in the end - I've had worse periods. And once I'd actually miscarried, it tailed off pretty quickly.

It felt like forever but I already feel so much better now (and it's only been a few days since I stopped bleeding).

Thinking of you

Hi Nicola how are things today? X

Thanks for asking @Rainbowbluebell , its still not come out so I have rang EPU. They ave made me an appointment for tomorrow morning to give me medication to soften my cervix. I've to go home then and remain mobile. She couldn't tell me how long it would take to work.

@Rubicon80 thank you for sharing your story. I will feel relieved too once its all gone. The worst part of me has been all the false hope of everything growing, a heartbeat but then heavier bleeding, to then be told again, everything looks fine. The fact I have lost it has not been as bad the journey I've been on over the past 2 weeks.

@nicola18737
I know exactly what you mean about the false hope and the uncertainty. At least once you know that it's definitely happened, there is an end in sight.

For me I was also really scared once I knew it wasn't developing properly, I was worried that it might end up as a very late miscarriage or even serious anomalies that would mean a late termination. I was glad that it resolved itself sooner rather than later.

for you. I hope that tomorrow goes as smoothly as possible and that you are able to enjoy some time with your little boy soon.

Keep us posted if you feel like it. x