Please or to access all these features

Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

What do I do now?

3 replies

Peacockhouse · 12/01/2019 19:27

I took the kids for a private scan on Tuesday, they wanted to see the baby. Horrifically instead of seeing the baby on the screen I was told there was no longer a heartbeat. The kids were all asking questions, I was on my own with them and in total shock. I think my 8 and 7 year old are traumatised. I've tried to be honest with them and tell them in an age appropriate way what's happening, but I don't know if I'm doing the right thing.
I've been in a lot of pain today, and they know the baby has to come out. My 4 year old's tummy hurts and he's loosing his baby too. It makes me want to cry. I want to gather them up and cuddle them all tight and tell them everything is OK and it's all a horrific dream but I can't 1) it's not true and 2) I've spent all day in bed cramping on and off unable to move much and just want to be left alone.

Everyone is so sad and I don't know how to make this better for them. I feel I'm rambling now but I'm in so much pain and I just don't know what to say to them. What do I do? What do I say? How do I make this all better for my babies?

I should be 14 weeks, I had no idea anything was wrong, the kids just wanted to meet their new baby. We thought we would just see a wriggly baby on the screen, not be told the most horrific news.

OP posts:
cheeseislife8 · 12/01/2019 19:37

I'm so so sorry OP. I dont know what to suggest but it sounds like youve handled your children amazingly in the cirumstances. My mmc floored me, I can't imagine receiving that news with DCs in the room. Hand holding from here Flowers

herethereandnow · 12/01/2019 20:13

I'm so sorry for your loss and how you found out. I have no words or advice I'm so sorry. But sending you lots of love and support. Have you tried reaching out to SANDS or Tommy's? There are fantastic charities who can also give you support. We are all here for you xx

Peacockhouse · 12/01/2019 20:37

Thanks, I'm eating all chocolate, taking the good drugs and waiting for it all to end. I have an appointment on Monday at the hospital, so if its not over by then they will help things along, so there is an end in sight

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.