Terrified about having another miscarriage

[Tobebythesea]

I lost 2 pregnancies in 2018, one missed, one not, both at around 7 weeks. I’m now pregnant again and supposed to be 7 weeks, 2 days. I don’t want to book a booking appointment, I don’t want to go for an early scan but at the same time I’m desperate to know if there’s a heartbeat. Even if there is a heartbeat now, there might not be at 12 weeks, 20 weeks.... I’m finding this very difficult and I fear the worst. I don’t know what to do? I had nausea last week and now I don’t but I do have sore boobs. Booking a scan feels like tempting fate. Any thoughts or experiences would be greatly appreciated.

No advice but so much empathy. I also had two, one natural and one mmc in 2018. I'm now 16 weeks pregnant. I had two early scans before the 12 week one, I was lucky as my early pregnancy unit offered me an early scan due to my anxiety - is this something you could look into? I relaxed a bit after my 12 week scan and hoping I'll finally start to trust it'll happen after the 20 week!

Thinking of you, it's so hard to go through.

Thank you toasterstrudle. I could try and get a scan at the EPU. I’ve never had any good news there but maybe third time lucky?! Did you find the scans reassuring? Which weeks did you get scanned?

Totally understand currently 21 weeks after 2 losses one at 7 weeks one at 14 (mmc baby died around 9) still anxious and full of nerves now but can feel her move which is lovely. This pregnancy has been the hardest out of them all I've had bleeding with clots due to a hemorrage which has now gone but so scary! I did the same as you and believed third time lucky. I also booked booking in at 11 weeks as I couldn't face it. Epu were amazing with me and said due to my history they'd scan me every week if I wanted. Fingers crossed for you xxx

My mmc was discovered at 12 week scan so I think I had real anxieties around that. I got scanned at 8 weeks where we saw a heartbeat and I found that listed a big weight. I ended up getting scanned at 10+5 due to weight I'd lost with sickness - I think I would have paid a private one around then otherwise just for peace of mind. Then after the 12 week scan I've been far more relaxed!

Starting to feel nerves creeping in again but 20 week scan is on the 23rd so reckon I can hold out until then.

I do feel for you, I don't think I'll truly relax until baby is here but the scans have definitely reassured me that at least, at that point in time, things are progressing as they should.

It's so hard! I lost my baby in May at 12+3 but the baby measured 8+4, my dates had been two weeks out the whole time but it was still a horrible horrible experience.

I felt pregnant again in October and the anxiety has been awful. I had a bleed at 6 weeks and had a scan which showed no foetus, went back 2 weeks later after googling blighted ovums the whole time to see a little heart beat. I then had a bleed at 8+4 but decided I couldn't bear to know just before Christmas that my baby had died. I then googled obsessively until my 12 week scan where I saw my little 11+1 baby wriggling around and the sonographer told me 'i have no worries at all about this little one' - however I have to go back in two weeks as the baby was a tiny bit small for the nuchal tests, although is measuring perfectly according to my dates, and I've been googling worst case scenarios about that. I have mental health issues anyway so I have lots of obsessive thoughts about tempting fate etc.

The moral of this waffle is I think you will worry whether you get a scan or not. And whether or not you get a scan, your body will do what it's going to do. I was lucky to get my 12 week scan date early, I'm not sure how well I would have coped waiting until a much later date, but I find the stress and anxiety leading up to having a scan just as bad as not having one booked!

I left my booking appointment really late, but finally decided I had to do it, otherwise I wouldn't get a 12 week scan date. It was bloody hard but I found the midwife was very supportive and the sonographer was fab and super quick when I explained my history at my first scan.

Good luck with your pregnancy X