Hi,
Last week I lost my second child at 10 weeks although she passed at 5 weeks. I say she as I feel like she was a she. I’ve carried a boy before and this felt different. Definitely more sassy. Name a pregnancy symptom and I had it. I didn’t even know a twitchy eye was a symptom before she came along. She certainly got me in some awkward situations during her little life.
Anyway she came out at home and I’m wondering what I should do with her? I don’t want to bury her as we rent and I couldn’t bare leaving her if we moved. I’d like to cremate her but I don’t know if this is even an option. I want to keep her close.
I’m just finding it so difficult. She existed but yet she’ll never have a birth or death certificate. I want to tell everyone about her and let myself imagine what she’d have been like. I was the only one that felt her presence so I feel like it’s my duty as her mum to let the world know about her.
Is what I’m feeling normal? I feel like I’m going insane. I’m husband is very supportive towards me and how I’m feeling but doesn’t want to talk about her. Mainly because as a man who deals in facts he doesn’t believe she was a girl and as we will never know I guess he’s put up a wall to protect himself.
Anyway I guess what I’m asking in short is how do I move on now? I still want her part of my life but is that normal? I want to talk about her all the time but is that going to help me?
Thanks x