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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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Struggling emotionally after miscarriage

2 replies

SRK16 · 17/11/2018 09:47

I had a miscarriage a couple of weeks ago. We had been ttc for over two years, had fertility treatment etc. Obviously I was completely devastated, but I thought I had quite quickly come to terms with the loss and after a week was feeling sad, but stronger in myself and positive about future potential pregnancy.
The last couple of days have been horrendous. I am overwhelmed by such strong sadness. I cried for 5 hours on Thursday and could not stop. In the past I had mental health problems and the level of emotion I have felt feels like the way I did when I was very unwell. I’m finding it very frightening and have scared myself with some of my thoughts (feeling like I want to self harm, though don’t think I will act on it). I am lucky that I have very supportive friends and family who know I am struggling to some extent. I have a therapist who has been very helpful. My doctor signed me off work until next week and I’m hoping being back at work might make me feel more normal, but I work in a high stress, emotionally demanding job, and I’m a little worried about what it will be like.

I know in the scheme of things two weeks is no time at all, and if I were talking to someone else I would say of course you may feel all over the place. I know hormones are playing a part too. It’s just very hard to make sense of how I’m feeling and hard to listen to the advice I would give others.

Have others felt this way? How long for the worst to pass? What helped?

OP posts:
Rollycat · 17/11/2018 14:57

Sorry for your loss Thanks

I had a MMC in September, and have been feeling up and down since. It feels very hormone related. Some days are happy, some days a bit blank and sort of nothing about it all and other days sad. Sad days are getting fewer and further apart Smile I agree with you that it's difficult to be as kind to yourself as you would be to others. Hopefully talking it through with people is helping with this? Sometimes once I've said out loud that I feel guilty on a bad day for leaving work early/avoiding a social event/lying on the sofa, it's helped me realise that there's no point feeling guilty and I just need to do what it takes to manage my feelings the best I can.
Regarding work, any way you can go back on reduced hours or duties? Hopefully they have been supportive so far. Wishing you happier days ahead x

SRK16 · 18/11/2018 14:23

Thank you Rollycat. I am going back on a phased return so maybe this will help. I also just joined a new gym so hoping this may help my mood too.

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