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Missed miscarriage at 9 weeks
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alisha1234 · 10/10/2018 11:35

On 1/10/18 we went for our 12 week dating scan where we found out that our baby was measuring at 9 weeks with no heartbeat which meant that I had had a missed miscarriage. At the time I didn’t really understand it. I didn’t know what was going to happen but I chose to let nature take its course as I wanted to bury the baby with a rose bush. On the 9th of October I started getting contractions that got got closer and closer every time. It started at about 1am and by about 7/8am I was about to give up and go to the hospital to get help. These pains were proper contractions, it hurt as much as when you are in labour but at about 8:30 am while I was mid contraction I felt a pop in my stomach and I knew that was it. I went to the toilet and passed everything at that point. When I wiped the baby was on the tissue which I was so glad about. I wanted to see my baby and I did. The pain decreased immediately and I was so glad that I went through with the choice of having a natural miscarriage. I strongly suggest to anybody who is going through this that they naturally pass the baby. Even though the pain got unbearable I would go through it all again in a heartbeat so that I could have the closure of seeing my baby. Please feel free to ask me anything! I just wanted to share my experience so that anybody who is going through it knows what is going to happen x

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AnnoyedByAlfieBear · 10/10/2018 11:50

Sorry for your loss. Thanks I had a MMC also, and this is totally the opposite of my experience. From first scan, I waited 6 weeks for nature to take its course at the advise of 2 different consultants. I spent the whole 6 weeks bleeding and in pain before a nice new consultant offered me surgery. I found that surgery provided me the finality of closure.

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DBN1 · 10/10/2018 12:18

So sorry for your loss OP Flowers
I was told on a Saturday that I had a MMC but told to wait a week for another scan to make sure.
I had to go on a trip on the Monday, leaving home very early in the morning. About an hour before I was due to leave I started getting really bad cramps. I had no sanitary protection, it was too early for the shops so I just had to make do with toiket roll until I could get to the shops at the airport.
By the time I got there I was bleeding really heavily (I could feel it running sown my legs, fortunately I was wearing dark, loose legged but tight ankled trousers).
I bought maternity pads and strong painkillers.
Once I'd boarded the flight and we had taken off I was in agony but, travelling alone, I had no one to tell and share it with.
After the 4.5 hour flight (and 10 soaked pads) I arrived at my destination airport. I spent ages in the loo trying to clean myself up before the 3 hour road journey to home.
I wish I'd had the chance to see my baby.

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AnyaMumsnet · 10/10/2018 12:49

Hi there OP,

We hope you don't mind but we're going to move this over to the pregnancy loss boards now, we think you'll get a lot more support there.

So sorry for your loss Flowers

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alisha1234 · 10/10/2018 18:37

Sorry for your losses ThanksThankyou for sharing your experiences with me, I have been having intense pains today(the day after) they are like minor contractions. I was just wondering if anybody else had experienced this after?

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RhubarbRocks · 10/10/2018 18:52

Alisha - sorry for your loss. I had a second lot of contractions/cramping during my first MMC - it turned out that things hadn’t completed - I had a second phase of heavy bleeding and more tissue loss a few days after the first. May not be the case for you but it can happen.

Just waiting to go through it again - MMC diagnosed yesterday and although have ERPC booked for next Tuesday I suspect it will happen naturally before then.

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DuggeesWoggle · 10/10/2018 19:01

Sorry for your loss. I had a mmc in July although I had already started bleeding in advance of my 12 week scan so went to the EPAU. I chose the medical management route as I wanted to give my body a nudge and for me it was very quick and not particularly painful. I know it's not like that for everyone. Like you I had a strong feeling of what I wanted to do with my baby, for me I wanted to have a little bonfire (didn't want a fixed point to remind me, especially as we're thinking of moving house so didn't want to leave it behind).

For me it felt like closure and a final act that I could do for my baby that I had barely had time to even think about - to birth it and release it to the skies. For some that would not be the right choice.

I hope that you can use your 'positive' (if you can think of it that way) experience to help you heal and make sense of what has happened. Your body recognised something wasn't right and took steps to protect you from infection and further complications. Doesn't stop the whole thing being a totally shitty time.

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