Scared waiting for miscarriage to start

[Nellie3]

Hi everyone, first time posting on here but I'm feeling really scared and un-informed about miscarriage.

This is my first pregnancy and I had my 12 week ultrasound scan on Wednesday. Unfortunately they could only see a sac measuring 7 weeks with no fetus inside. They said it is a high chance of blighted ovum and there is no baby, or my dates could be completely out and the pregnancy is not as far along as we thought (I have extremely irregular periods so there is a slim chance of this). They booked me in for another scan in a weeks time to confirm and discuss miscarriage options.

Yesterday (2 days after first scan) I started cramping and bleeding, which so far is moderate and the pain has been similar to a heavy period. I phoned the early pregnancy unit and they said to only come to a&e if the bleeding gets very heavy or the paid unbearable. I'm feeling really scared about what's about to happen to my body, in a way I'd rather it be done medically so I didn't have this waiting game, but they won't do anything until my next scan.

Luckily my partner is off work for the next couple of days and he is an amazing support, but any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you x

Hi, similar situation here, am having miscarriage at 10 weeks and they said sac stopped growing at 6-7 weeks.

Physically I have found it no worse than a period but it is different in that it stops and starts with cramping. So far am on day 6 and think I passed the sac this morning so hopefully not too much more to go now. Of course im sure it is different for everyone but just wanted to reassure you that physical side has been ok for me so far. I was relieved tbh when they said the sac was empty as my main fear was passing a tiny fetus.

Hope all goes well for you

@milkjetmum thanks so much for your reply, Im sorry to hear you are also going through this hard experience. Can I ask how you have been passing the time? I'm scared to go out in case I have a huge gushing of blood or intense pain, but I'm getting bored at home already after a day! Im also unsure how long I will need off work, I'm a primary teacher so it's not easy to be off but I can't go in like this. I need to find out how to get a doctor's note for this type of thing x

@Nellie3
Hi, sorry you're in this situation. I was you 7 weeks ago, I could have written the post myself. I passed the sac at home, 6 days after the scan and 8days after the bleeding started. Everyone is different. I felt more comfortable staying at home so I ran my gp and the asked how many days I wanted to take off and got me the sick leave. The cramps can escalate to contractions pain. I was fine after 2 hours of passing the sac, and glad I had the toilet nearby. If you go out pack some painkillers (paracetamol and ibuprofen) and big pads. Take care of yourself xx

I have been going into work, but took Friday off but more for emotional reasons. Prefer to keep going but obviously not pushing myself. I found most of the clots came out on the loo or with wiping so otherwise had just been like managing being on my period. Sorry if tmi. Am aware I am only a few days ahead of you so things might still change.

@Ladybug84 I agree I think I will feel more comfortable at home than at work, especially with the nature of my job. Can I ask how you are feeling now a few weeks after your miscarriage?

@milkjetmum How are you feeling now after this morning?

Today has been very easy, light bleeding and no more cramping so hopefully it is finishing now. Back to hospital tomorrow for 2nd blood test and check that all is as it should be, but have felt like my old self today. Enjoyed 2 glasses of prosecco on an afternoon out so I know this probably sounds heartless but that was enjoyable although of course I would obviously prefer not to be in this situation.

Hope you are feeling well @Nellie3 both physically and emotionally

Unfortunately I'm still dealing with the MC. Part of the womb still had lining left (they call it products of conception) after all and my hormones had not dropped to 0. Last week I had them removed by ERPC and now I'm waiting for AF. Hopefully it will be over soon 🤷🏻‍♀️

How was your day? Had you passed the sac now?

@milkjetmum I'm glad you're feeling a bit more like your old self and have finished the worst of it hopefully! You 100% deserved that prosecco. Is your blood test today to check that you are no longer pregnant?

@Ladybug84 I'm sorry to hear that :( 'products of conception' is such a horrible term for them to use. Hopefully you will be able to recover a bit more emotionally now you know for sure that there is nothing left. How did you find out that your miscarriage had not finished naturally?

I haven't passed the sac, I'm still bleeding moderately and it just feels/looks like a period so far really. The waiting is horrible! I'm trying hard to distract myself but my mind keeps going back to what is happening :(

Yes I understand test today is to check hcg levels are dropping and depending on the result will either be no further action required, come back and retest on Tues or maybe more intervention required. Said they will ring me sometime today. I feel pretty well so hoping for option 1 or 2. The waiting and uncertainty is the hardest bit I think. Good luck to everyone today

So sorry you have to go through a miscarriage. I know that there is nothing that can be said to ease your pain. All of the best wishes and from everyone does not bring your baby back. Please just know that people are thinking of you, feel for you and have been in your position. I'm very sorry to hear about this. I know there are no words that can make you feel better. I can only empathize with you. As everyone else has said, there's nothing that I or anyone can say to ease your mind, BUT I would suggest to try NOT being alone too much. As most of the women on this forum, I'm TTC and it's been very frustrating for me and my husband. My heart goes out to you. But I am so very sorry that you have to go through this. I just hope God will ease your pain. You are going to have to go through the grief, but hopefully you will be able to come out of it with new hope. Just keep believing it will happen. Not today, but it will. The good thing is that you can keep on trying again and it'll come to you.

@milkjetmum fingers crossed for you! Let us know the result? Xx

@XamberXx thank you so much for your kind and hopeful message, that means so much. The kindness of strangers is a beautiful thing :)

Thanks @Nellie3 and hope you are feeling well today. Option 2 for me so back for another blood test tomorrow morning. Feeling less well since last night, really tired and washed out so off work again today, but bleeding virtually stopped now. I guess this is either the hormone changes (which seems likely as a bit tearful again) or just the physical toll catching up with me.

Other than dh I have only shared what's going on with one close friend and one colleague, but I don't really want to share with many people, it feels private to me.

Hi @milkjetmum and @Ladybug84 just wanted to see how you're both doing now? I decided to have a D&C which took place yesterday. It was fine but I feel a lot of mixed emotions now. Exhausted but can't sleep, nervous about becoming pregnant again, anxious to 'get better' and throw myself in to work again, numb and not able to cry. My other half is at work now for 3 long days but I've got a friend coming over today and tomorrow. It's just a horrible situation for us all and I hope we have positive pregnancies in the future xxx

Hi @Nellie3 it been a slow rumbling process for me. Another blood test on Tues and hcg at 400 so coming down but slow. Still some light bleeding and occasional mild cramping. Will phone epu again if it doesnt stop by Monday as will have been 3 weeks then. But advise from them at the moment is to do a pregnancy test at end of the month and come back if still positive.

I feel keen for this all to finish as quite keen to get back to ttc now. But with logical head on would like one 'normal' period first to make sure all back as it was. Feel like I have come to terms with it all now, although obviously still a bit raw when going into nitty gritty with anyone. I find the repeat trips to the epu for blood tests stressful as have been going alone and lots of couple holding hands and clearly going through their own new pain. Glad to hear you have lots of support around for you, I think it has been important for me to have a few trusted people to confide in.

@Nellie3
Thanks for asking and glad your surgery went ok.
I have had a few scans after passing the sac that confirmed the remaining POC.
I'm feeling a lot better emotionally, although I still talk about it I don't do it very often. Just waiting for AF to come now and then ready to TTC again. I should have done another pregnancy test by now to check hormone levels but I keep forgetting it. I'm really trying to live as normal as possible without obsessing about when things are going to happen. Today is 3 weeks since my ERPC. Time makes everything better take care of yourself xx