I just wanted to say thank you all so much for your kind replies, especially when some of you had been through the same thing so recently and it must be so raw. It meant a lot to me and i really am grateful.
I didn’t reply earlier as i wasn’t really up to it, but i thought i would update in case it helps anyone later. I was not called back by the EPU until 7.30pm, so obv no chance to be seen before the weekend.
Appointment made for Monday morning, and a confirmation scan agreed withe private scan. After a long wait afterwards, they talked me through the three options - expectant management, medical, or D&C (surgical). As i’d already had the weekend to read up (including the incredibly helpful threads here on what to expect in natural and medical options) i was able to choose straight away and chose the D&C. I have had a general anaesthetic before and had no problems - in fact, i rather liked the total abnegation of responsibility when i’m feeling overwhelmed and emotional. Booked in for wednesday morning. Arrived at 7ish, went in for op at 10ish, woke up about 10.30, in recovery until about 1pm when called my partner to collect me. Went home and stagnated on sofa all day with bad cramps, but those eased up about 7pm-ish and i’ve been fine since. A bit battered and tender feeling but no actual pain. Bleeding much lighter than i was expecting too, although i’m aware it might fluctuate.
Overall, i just wanted to say how much this was the right decision for me - it was painless and trauma-free. You have options over what happens to the remains and i chose cremation - i personally could not have coped emotionally with flushing down a toilet and the scariest part for me was the delay between discovery and surgery, and desperately hoping i wouldn’t spontaneously start to miscarry in the interim. The staff were all universally lovely to me (except the brief meeting with the surgeons who had zero social skills, but i’ve had several surgeries before and know this is fairly standard - as my DP said, normal people can’t cut other people up for a living: would you rather have good surgeons or empathy given what they’re about to do?) the anaesthetist was lovely and reassuring, as were all the nurses. One insisted on walking me to the toilet after and waiting for me just in case i was shaky or lightheaded and needed reassurance. It was also the right decision for me because (possible complications aside) it hopefully draws a line under the experience and allows me to start moving on emotionally. I’m no longer the snotty wreck i was on Friday when i found out, although i think it will take a long time to stop randomly being overcome with sadness at odd times and for odd triggers.
I just wanted to write this as i’ve seen several people scared of the surgical option on here and i wanted to reasure everyone that for some (including me) it was a low-stress, low-pain choice.