Missed miscarriage- what to expect?

[Narna85]

Sorry to anyone who has been through or is going through to same loss, my heart goes out to you.

We had our 12 week dating scan last Monday at 12+1. Our fears were confirmed and no heartbeat was detected. They confirmed baby had stopped growing at 8+5. I had told my husband that I felt something was wrong, I’d had spotting at 11weeks and some lower back pain. I just didn’t feel the same as when I was carrying our DS (now 5yrs).

We opted for surgical Intervention but earliest they had available is next Friday (12 days after scan). I lost some bloody tissue within hours of the dating scan on Monday, I had no pain. Then a day of nothing, then on Wednesday evening cramping started but stopped when I went to bed. It’s been on and off since then, each day it’s started earlier and lasted longer and has got progressively more painful. It’s not like period pain, it’s like onset of early labour with regular contractions.

I’m on day 8 now of bleeding and pain, quite truly fed up with waiting. I’ve only passed blood and small clots, so I know the baby and sack are yet to come. Last night I was up for 2hrs having contractions to the point of pushing but feel like my body is struggling to pass the pregnancy. I am glad things are happening naturally because I am now worried about adding more scarring to my uterus with D&C. I had a placental abruption and emergency c section with DS, it’s taken us 19 months to conceive after coming off of depo. We want to try again as soon as my body has recovered, but worried D&C might prolong things or cause further problems.

Has anyone else experienced a natural mc that’s taken this length of time? I want things to pass before I have to go to theatre on Friday. I haven’t got another scan until Wednesday with EPU and don’t know how much more I can take being in pain all day and night. I’m scared to go out or back to work in case in happens there, I feel like a prisoner in my own home.

I’ve read so much about what to expect when mc at home, but just feel like I’m getting all the signs and pain but it’s not progressing and taking too long. it’s like a never ending nightmare and feels like further punishment following the horrible news that this baby wasn’t meant to be 😞

Sending love and hugs to anyone having to go through the same x

Hi Narna. Didn’t want this to go unanswered. I had a MMC in January, scan at 9 weeks showed embryo wasn’t growing, further scan a week later confirmed it. Like you I had concerns about surgical management having also had a difficult emcs in the past with scarring.

I opted for medical management, which resulted in my passing sac but was incomplete. After 3 weeks in total of bleeding I ended up with a bad infection and had to have surgical management anyway. If it happened again I’d opt for surgical management as quickly as possible I think. Like you the waiting time was tortuous for me.

I physically recovered very quickly after erpc but was quite tearful and upset for quite a while. Give yourself time to recover, I went straight back to work and regret that now.

I’m 7 weeks pregnant again and a nervous wreck but think that’s to be expected after miscarriage. I’ve had 3 losses but found the MMC the hardest, it’s very cruel to have no signs before a scan.

Sorry you’re going through this. Just to say I only passed blood & small clots too but scan a week later found I’d passed the pregnancy. So you might not need the D&C. Fingers crossed for you. Xx

Thank you both for your replies and I’m so sorry to hear you have been through this also. No one truly understands unless they’ve been through this themselves and having others to speak to is a great help.

Just feel so worn down by the pain, feel like I wake up and go through the same thing everyday but with no progression and going to end up having the surgery anyway. Feels like the agony is all for nothing. I’ve accepted the loss and that It was meant to be and I know emotions will resurface when the physical side is done. It’s just so cruel to endure this for so long knowing the inevitable is to come.

You poor thing paranormalbouquet, 3 weeks is so unfair. Huge congratulations to you on your new pregnancy, wishing you all the luck in the world for your little bean. It’s never going to be easy after loss but please do try and stay positive.

Wishing you both peace after your experiences. Stay strong and thank you both for your support xxxx