I had a MMC in September 2016, the baby died at approx ten weeks old and I found out at my 12-week scan.
The baby was due on the 24th March 2017 and therefore would have been one about today. I knew the date was looming but as I was playing on the swings with my DD this morning, it hit me like a smack with a shitty stick. I did properly try and grieve at the time and as time has gone on, it has all got much easier. I have been very lucky and had a DS since then too; he's now 16 weeks and snoozing beside me. I appreciate how fortunate I am but feel so incredibly sad today, like it's dragging me down to the ground.
I had to have a D and C procedure at the time and actually drove passed the hospital where it happened and all I could focus on was the incinerator and think that was where my tiny baby ended up-I've never thought like this before.
I once read somewhere that if you ask a woman who has lost a baby how old it would be today, they would always know. I feel the same grief today as I did the day of the awful scan.
to all that have lost babies.