Just want some support

[urbangirl09]

Hi everyone, I'm actually based in Australia but having a hard time finding a space to share and ask for some support.

About two weeks ago I miscarried at about 6w and I didn't know I was pregnant. We weren't planning anything and it would have been a happy surprise but finding only when I lost the baby was devastating. I didn't realise how sad it would make me but I just feel the loss so intensely. So many what ifs. I feel like I failed something that was entirely dependent on me. The only other time I've felt a loss this strong was when I lost my mum when I was 10. I feel like I have no to talk to who would understand although everyone around me is being supportive. Due date would have been 29th Oct and the ultrasound tech date me and say I would have been 7 weeks hit me like a ton of bricks.

I think I just want to hear what you've been through and how you ladies got through it.

Feeling rather empty and lost,
urban girl

I’m so sorry for your loss. I have no personal experience of this so can’t offer advice but I do know that you have not failed and this is not your fault. Miscarriages happen more regularly than most people realise and are usually nobody’s fault.

I’m sorry I can’t help with this but just wanted to offer my support, especially as it is early hours of the morning here so not many people likely to be around.

Thank you. It’s weird. I have always known the statistics but after experiencing it, an irrational part of my mind seems to take over. Thank you for reminding me it was not my fault. Xx

@urbangirl09 I'm so sorry for your loss. You must be going through a whole heap of emotions. Just remember that sometimes pregnancies just aren't viable and there's nothing that could have been done to prevent it.

I'm 8wks post MC myself and still getting my head around it. Some days are better than others and I find that random things will set me off. It will get less painful in time as grief always does. I'm just reaching the point where the hcg has left my system (it's been a very slow process for me) and still under care of EPU so that's been hard to deal with but I'm feeling positive for the future.

I think even though you weren't trying you'll still have so much to process and a lot of questions so please don't feel like you can't be open and ask them on here. There's no such thing as a stupid question when it comes to miscarriage. I hope you're doing ok.

Hi @hidcat, thanks for your kind words. I’m sorry you are going through this as well. It is still feeling very raw some days. The topic of miscarriages, babies and literally anything else makes me emotional.

I had ovulation pains almost 10 days after the mc and they lasted a whole week. Does anyone know when I should expect my period and will it just be normal or should I prepared for anything?

I really trying to fight the feeling of failure but it’s a tough one.

If you had ovulation pains then you can expect your period about 2 weeks later but always good to prepare for the fact it may not stick to that. I thought I had ovulation pains last week so expecting mine sometime towards the end of next week.

Try to keep reminding yourself that you've done nothing wrong. Eventually you should believe it again. Lots of hugs to you.