I am currently going through my 2nd miscarriage (plus a chemical in between) since last July. I have a DD who is 8 and am now 40. DD is from a former relationship and my DP is only 33. We get married in May, and have been trying for almost a year.
This bfp was good and strong, and early, with good line progression until some bleeding at 5+4. Scan showed growth but HCG stopped increasing and I have started spotting in the last 24 hours. I am just waiting for the main event now and worried it will happen in work.
We are struggling massively with this. Unable to believe lightening has struck 3 times, it is ruining the run up to the wedding, and the slow start to the m/c has dragged on for 2 weeks of flipping between hope and horror. I am going between being utterly desolate and screamingly angry, much more than before.
In the meantime, we need to think about when to give up. I have wanted another child since DD was born, and have always hated exdp for not being able to stay faithful long enough for me to have a second. DP desperately wants a child, and I so want to know how it feels to have a family with someone who can be a decent, caring father. I am now at the point of despairing that it will ever happen, maybe I am just too old at 40, and how many times can we go through this before I crack? I truly am grateful for my DD, but this is so intrusive and consuming, and I have a real fear of her coping with so much alone later in life as she has no siblings or cousins. We know we need to take some time to come to terms with this, but the clock is ticking and I have no idea what to do now. I don't know what I am asking really, maybe for success stories or a way to let this go.