My best friend going through MMC

[Filzma]

Well, as you've seen from the title my BF called this morn to say she's just discovered she's had/having a MMC. While I feel sorry and helpless, ( she lives in a different country), I'm not sure what to say. I caught myself in time before blurting out, " well at least you have a DS to distract you from everything." Thanks to mumsnet, I shut my mouth before the thought left my lips. I feel really sorry and bad but want to make sure that comes across without saying something insensitive.

If you've been through a MC, please let me know what to say or not to say. I'm having a friend deliver flowers to her later this week. Also, how often should I call without being overbearing? I realise she might need time to process it herself as she only went to the ER after slight spotting. TIA

She's 12+5

I really appreciated friends genuinely listening and saying they were there. I'm sure she'll love the flowers. I'd ask her re: whether she wants to talk about it. I've had friends that did and didn't, and I did at first and then wanted to move on more than I had done. It's such an individual thing. Your poor friend

ApplesTheHare good idea! I'll just let her know she can call anytime she needs to talk. That way there's no pressure on either of us. I'm sorry for your loss 💕

I appreciated people simply saying I’m sorry.

It was so horribly awful - I had to wait a week before the D&C, knowing my baby had died. Just knowing people cared and were thinking about me was often enough. For what not to say - google the miscarriage association “simply say” campaign.

She’s very lucky to have a friend like you who cares enough to care about what they say xx

Just check in on her every few days. She'll be all over the place for a while. My friend sent me a giant box of luxury chocolates which I was really grateful for.

StillMissV and Elmosmum thank you so much! Will look at the site and get ideas. Will let her know I'll be on the other end of the phone if she needs to talk. A box of chocolates to go with the flowers too. Thanks guys!

Just tell her how sorry you are. Tell her you are there to listen whenever she needs to talk.