I returned from the hospital earlier today following a miscarriage at 10 weeks having been told I had a 'pregnancy of unknown location'. I feel strangely let down by this, and the care I have received.
I started light bleeding on Friday, so got an emergency gp appointment the next day, who sent me away saying that she couldn't book me in for a scan as it was 'too early' and an EPU would just send me away, and helpfully told me to 'not hoover!' I had my booking in appt on Monday and the midwife immediately made me an appt at an EPU for weds (today). She told me to present to A&E if I was in a lot of pain or the bleeding was heavy, so I went to the hospital yesterday morning following heavier bleeding overnight. The hospital said there wasn't anything they could do to hurry along the scan, but the doctor at least offered me codeine in case the pain became severe, but I declined as I didn't want to take anything if there was even the slightest chance I could still be pregnant. Overnight I bled really heavily and passed clots so was expecting bad news on the scan.
The sonographer could not see an embryo or sac so was not able to date when the pregnancy ended, but could see some blood and tissue left in my womb. I was taken to a private room and a nurse came in and told me the pregnancy was considered a 'PUL' because they had never seen evidence of a pregnancy. She explained the risks of an ectopic and arranged for my bloods, but kept repeating the phrase 'pregnancy of an unknown location'. I used the word 'miscarriage', she said that was 'probably the case' but they wouldn't use that word because the pregnancy had never actually been confirmed. I understand I am feeling emotional and fragile, but there is something about the experience I find lacking. Not acknowledging that my heavy bleeding and traumatic passing of clots as a miscarriage seems dismissive, and as a result I have been offered no kind of management or aftercare. I asked if I could expect more pain or bleeding, but she said it was 'impossible to say'. I was sent home with a leaflet of PUL, which again I feel does not fit my experience and almost dismisses it somehow. It seems to be more relevant to very early missed pregnancies and there is no mention of how to cope with bleeding or pain, or even mentioning the feelings of grief any woman would feel at losing a baby. Surely most natural miscarriages at 10 weeks are PUL as in most cases it'll be too early for a scan? Is this the experience therefore of most women who miscarry? It wasn't deliberate on the nurses part, but her repetition of 'we haven't confirmed the pregnancy' made me almost feel as if they couldn't just rely on me saying I was pregnant, even though there is tissue left in my womb and I have given numerous urine samples each time I went for help. I am probably being over sensitive and of course I understand the strain on services, but I feel waiting over 4 days from first bleed to find out your baby has died and then leaving the hospital with no acknowledgement of your physical or emotional pain makes a terrible experience worse.