Suspected miscarriage

[ClareAD]

Hi everyone, I am posting because I really need some advice. I am supposedly 9+5 today. Over the first few weeks of pregnancy I experienced typical symptoms of sore and enlarged boobs, nausea and hunger. In the past couple of weeks, these symptoms subsided. On Wednesday evening we had sex and in Thursday I started bleeding. At first it was brownish in colour and very light. Today it has been heavier and reddish in colour, although not as heavy as a regular period. This week, I've been on holiday in Greece and am now at the airport travelling home. (I can't wait to get home now). My GP told me if I have a suspected miscarriage (heavy bleeding, etc.), go straight to A&E. I live in central London and don't have one dedicated midwife to call. I'm planning on going to A&E Sunday morning. I am mentally preparing myself for the worst and in my gut I sort of know the pregnancy is over. I wanted to ask if anyone has been through this experience before? What should I expect of hospital? Will they give me a scan? Blood test? How can I prepare for the coming week/ weeks? Thank you so much for reading this. It is the most isolating feeling and I'm just so thankful for my wonderful partner and these threads. X

Hi Clare, I'm really sorry for what you're going through.

A&E would hopefully do a scan to look for the pregnancy and a heart beat. That will confirm whether it is viable and ongoing or not. (Unfortunately though some A&Es don't or can't do scans and you would have to wait and see the Early Pregnancy Unit during the week.) If you were having severe pain or bleeding they would also treat that. They probably won't need to take blood.

There is a long running thread in this section on practical tips for coping with miscarriage. I would get in super pads, the strongest painkillers you can get hold of, and anything that distracts and comforts you if miscarriage is confirmed. All is not lost yet - some bleeds in early pregnancy are benign and at least at 9+ weeks the scan should tell you straightaway if you are miscarrying or not.

I wish you the best

Sorry this is happening to you. Personally I would ignore your GP's advice to go to A&E (unless of course you were in uncontrollable pain/haemorrhaging). In my experience they may not scan you at the weekend, and will probably just tell you to go to an EPU (early pregnancy unit) on Monday morning.

Unfortunately, if you are miscarrying there isn't really much the hospital can do, other than confirm it. You can self refer to the EPU at UCLH, although be prepared for a wait, esp on a Monday. They are very good there though. Alternatively, if it's convenient, the EPU at the Whittington (Archway) is also very good and usually a lot quieter.

I hope you have a pleasant surprise, lots of women do bleed during pregnancy and it doesn't always mean game over. Best of luck to you.

Hi both, thank you so much for your replies. I didn't realise that I could self refer, I feel quite clueless about it all! I am registered with royal London in Whitechapel. The pain and bleeding is bearable with medium cramping, so I probably don't need to go to A&E but I think it may be a psychologically need to get some form of medical support. It will also help me plan for the week ahead and feel less isolated I guess.
Separately, I had also booked a private scan for Monday evening which I will probably cancel based on what the hospital tells me tomorrow or Monday morning.
I have another incredibly dumb question: I haven't told work I was pregnant. I don't know whether I should tell them I think I'm miscarrying, as obviously I won't be in work on Monday if I'm at hospital. Do you think it's best to conceal it until its certain?

It's totally up to you whether you tell them. Advantage would be that it means they should treat it as pregnancy based absence, which means it isn't counted against you if your sickness record is a concern, and also that they understand you will be in emotional distress. Disadvantage is that they may use it against you (not putting you up for projects etc. since they now know you're trying to get pregnant). A lot comes down to what you feel comfortable with and how much you trust them.

If you are miscarrying take your time about going back to work - don't rush.

I forgot to say, if you prefer to tell them you have a stomach bug or a sudden attack of the flu or something instead that's totally ok.

Ok thank you so much. My work place is fairly supportive so I'd probably go with the truth. Good to know it normal to take the time off. Although I do feel MC is still such a taboo subject which is why I'm so clueless about it all. I'll also look at the other threads too.. x

Also- one other question: in other threads I read about a medical procedure that helps MC along, a four letter acronym called E, something. Would I need that if I've already started heavily bleeding? X

An ERPC - evacuation of the retained products of conception. Those are done usually after a missed or silent miscarriage where scan shows the foetus has died but there has been no bleeding and the body isn't naturally miscarrying.

If you have already started to miscarry they probably won't intervene, as ERPC has a small risk of complications including uterine scarring. Ideally they should scan you after the miscarriage though to confirm you've passed the pregnancy completely.

So so sorry Hun. There really are no words.

Hope it's not what you think but if it is, there are plenty of people you can "talk" to on here.

I had medical management yesterday (the tablets) after finding out I'd had a missed miscarriage on Tuesday. I had a very small amount of bleeding and lost my very strong pregnancy symptoms which roped me off, but didn't want to wait for it to happen naturally as we were told that could take a while (and we go away soon).

Good advice above: sanitary pads, strong painkillers and hold those dear to you close. Lots of love honey xx

Claire / I'm so so sorry you're going through this.

I had an erpc as I wanted to get everything over with and I was signed off work for a week. Work were very kind about it.

Hi everyone, thank you so much for all the info. As a really sad update- I got home from holiday last night around 2-ish. The bleeding and cramping increased on the plane and in the taxi, but fortunately I was able to manage it. At home, in the bathroom, I had a bit of a panicked episode where the blood was so heavy it was unmanageable for a few minutes. I felt some movements that were totally new to me, like the baby or some blood clots literally falling out of me. Apologies if this is TMI, but I did glimpse the tiny, 1cm long baby. In exactly the shape the apps show at the early weeks. That was by far the most shocking part of it. I showered and the bleeding and pain subsided. It is now like a normal period. I feel so numb just now. It definitely hasn't hit me emotionally yet. I am going to go to hospital today or at least contact my EPU. I feel I need some sort of medical reassurance and closure to this. Thank you so much for being there for me here. X

I am sure that I wouldn't need an ERPC now. It all seems to have happened so quickly. (At the moment I feel I could get up and go to work but I know that would not be the right thing.) Thinking about you all who have been through similar too. X

I'm so sorry

It does sound like you have now passed the gestational sac. That is usually the hardest part physically and emotionally. Hopefully a scan will confirm for you that the worst is over and you have passed the tissue associated with the pregnancy.

Take care of yourself and don't even think about work for a few days. Let yourself grieve and be very gentle with yourself.

So sorry Hun. Glad it was over quickly though. Def take some time off and use towels, not tampons as you don't want infections.

Lots of love xx

My best advice emotionally is let yourself feel what you feel - don't try to be strong or "OK" for your partner or work or mum or whoever - and I would suggest letting yourself feel the grief for this pregnancy before you focus too much on conceiving again. I became obsessed with conceiving again immediately with the idea, which I didn't really admit to myself, that I could get up the duff again instantly and make the miscarriage not really have happened. Of course all that did is make me deeply unhappy and set back my ability to grieve and move on.

Thinking of you today x

Hi everyone, thank you so much for your support over the last few days. I went to A&E on Sunday and was referred to the emergency gynae unit for this morning. I have been really happy with the service and care. A trans vaginal ultrasound showed no pregnancy in the womb, but the bloods still showed I was pregnant, so they want to rule out a ectopic pregnancy. I'm going back on Wednesday for more blood tests. Physically I feel worse than I expected too. I am very weak due to anaemia and blood loss and have been told to rest. Emotionally I'm still numb and trying to process the information overload from the hospital. Generally content with the treatment I've received. Still can't quite believe this has happened but so comforting to know that many others have been through similar. X