Does anyone know if there's a limit to how many surgical terminations you can have? (In my case for medical reasons)

[SleepFreeZone]

I had a surgical removal due to MMC in 2015 and conceived DS2 a couple of months after. I'm 15 weeks pregnant with a baby that's found to have a very serious disability not compatible with life so will be having a surgical procedure to terminate the pregnancy in the next weeks or so.

I am 42, this is a huge contributing factor to my losses as we had genetic testing and there is no genetic issues beyond age. I feel like I would like to try again but I am concerned there will be a point where medical advice will be to stop.

Anyone gone through similar?

Thank you 💐

I'm very sorry that you are going through this.

Unfortunately I have been in an almost identical situation. MMC in 2013, had sugical management, conceived DD six months later. In December I had another MMC, and surgical management again, conceived again six weeks later but severe problems found at my dating scan and the baby died at 14 weeks (diagnosis of T13/Patau syndrome), so I had to have another ERPC. I am 43, and my age is almost certainly the reason for the T13.

My cycle hasn't righted itself yet, almost four months after the ERPC, but I am beginning to feel ok about trying once more (I am having counselling too). Medical advice was to try again when we felt ready, it only takes one good egg.

I am more worried that we won't conceive easily again, but if we do then I expect to be a complete wreck. This will be my absolutely last attempt though as it's too tough on my mental health and my family.

I think as long as you are realistic about the chances of success and you feel that you can cope with another loss then there is no reason not to continue TTC.

Good luck.

I have tried to avoid surgical management every time with my recurrent miscarriages because of the proven link with Asherman's Syndrome, or scarring of the womb. Natural management or once medical management have always been okay for me, despite being pressed by a consultant to have a D&C recently. I've never had a loss as late as yours though and have always miscarried fully by week 12-13.
I'm so sorry for your losses and hope all goes well for you.

Thank you 💐

Do you think one option is kinder to the baby over the other? I assume in both situations the baby is delivered with their heart still beating? I'm really struggling trying to come to terms with snuffing out a life even though I know with an Edwards baby they either die in the womb or soon after being delivered anyway

Oh dear, now that I don't know but my guess would be vaginal delivery e.g. medical management (pessaries) or natural. All my babies have died beforehand so it's never a situation I've faced and I'm so sorry you need to. Is there a doctor you could ask? It's such an important question and my heart goes out to you.

I would imagine that at 15/16 weeks a baby would not survive delivery if you chose medical management.

I could be wrong, but when we were contemplating a tfmr, I know that I read that for terminations over 20/21 weeks they inject something into the baby's heart to stop it prior to delivery.

Although we were, fortunately, spared having to make the decision in the end, I spent two weeks weighing up the pros and cons of both procedures. In the end I just couldn't face the possibility of medical management failing and having to have surgery anyway (as happened to a friend), and surgery posed fewer practical issues re: childcare. It was a very difficult choice though, between two equally shit options, and I changed my mind almost daily.

I hope it all goes as smoothly as possible for you.

Ah that's interesting ibentmywookie, I did wonder as the last thing you want to possibly hear is a baby crying!!!!!

Ok, I think I've come to a decision. Seeing that I've pushed for surgical this time im going to see that through BUT if I decide to try again and the same happens I am going to go the MM route.

I don't want to keep going under GE and I need to accept the consequences of TTC at my age or basically give up.

Hi all, I am so sorry for your losses. I am 44 and have had 2 tfmr in the last year. Agonising. I am trying to persuade my DH to give it one last go. If we do, and I get pregnant, and it doesn't work out, I will go for surgical. I don't know if it's dangerous to keep going under ge/have surgical. I have a strong preference for the latter though for very selfish reasons! Well - clearly I'd rather have neither but you know what I mean. Good luck xx