Should I complain

[JonesyMama1985]

Hi everyone,
Need some advice as I've got no one to talk to. Basically I had a private early scan on the 18/6 expecting to be about 7 weeks I was only 5. I took the scan to my midwife with my concerns and basically she said nothing and kicked me out the door. Had a rescan yesterday and the baby hadn't grown. I sort of suspected things weren't right. I've been told the call our local EPU (which isn't open on a weekend!?) I haven't cramped or bled and TBH I've been feeling very pregnant.
My concerns are this has been going on now for over 3 weeks and my body hasn't registered what's going on. Should the m/w have done more for me? My husband is very concerned about my health of this has been there for that amount of time. I don't want to be left any longer waiting for it to happen.
Also I told my boss when I found out (I'm a teacher so getting time off for appointments is hard) I told him in confidence and told him not to tell
Anyone before 12 weeks. However e has told some senior staff members who I know have told other people. How do you think I should tackle that situation.
Really need advice as I have no one to talk to, all my friends and family are the types that think the word pregnant and have a baby. (In fact before this happened my sister and I had the same due date )
X

I'm so sorry x

I think you need to prioritise but yes they all need dealing with.

If the unit is closed at weekends then your only route is a&e. Only other option is to ring the mw? Have you got the team number rather than just hers?

Re the head, personally I think a compliant is in order. Maybe speak to your union? Completely unacceptable behaviour.

Re the mw, Again you need to find the right person to listen to your concerns, not listening to the pg women is one the things I hated. Im not sure who that would be tbh.

Thanks, I've been awake all night so struggling to get my head straight. My local m/w group only answer the phone between 8.30 and 9.30am Mon-Fri. I'm worried if I go to A&E they'll send me away because I'm not bleeding or just say come back tomorrow. I know complaining seems a bit inconsequential but I'm struggling to think about anything. My head feels like a swamp!

I'm so sorry you're going through this. And sorry your midwife was so unhelpful and your boss has added to the stress.

I certainly think complaining is something you should consider, but I don't think that is the priority for right now.

I personally (speaking as someone who has had 4 miscarriages and is a doctor and has worked in A&E) wouldn't recommend going to A&E unless you start bleeding heavily or are in a lot of pain. They won't be able to offer you much, other than possibly booking you an appointment in EPU. I would ring EPU first thing in the morning or if they don't take self referrals get an emergency GP appointment and they will be able to refer you. EPU will probably want to rescan you and they will be able to discuss the options for managing the miscarriage.

With my first miscarriage I had several scans over 2 and a half weeks and then waited a further week to see if things happened naturally so by the time I had the medical management it was 4 weeks after my baby had stopped growing. The waiting is tough but generally not a risk to your health.