How to move forward

[DancingUnicorn]

On 31st March, at my 12 week scan, we found out that I'd had a mmc. I had surgical management the following Monday.

I know it was still very recent. I feel like I'm still healing physically, but mostly feeling back to my pre-pregnant self. But emotionally, I feel like every day gets harder. I feel like everything in the world is just a little bit darker than it was before. I could just sit and cry, all day. It's so hard to comprehend that just a few weeks ago my life was filled with so much joy. It's hard to imagine finding joy in trying to conceive or pregnancy ever again.

I feel guilty for feeling so sad. I just don't know what to do. I'm better when I need to go out, and coping ok at work, but I just fall to pieces when I'm at home.

Sorry for the moan. I just don't know where else to turn.

Thank you. Fingers crossed you get a response to your enquiry quickly and start to feel better. Good luck.

I feel like I could be writing your posts DancingUnicorn! I feel ok one minute, then I fall apart. It's like people are thinking oh what's up with her now if they see me upset. I said to my boyfriend yesterday that I felt down because it should have been my 12 week scan and he didn't even look up from his phone he just said "that's sad" and carried on.

I think we just need to take each day as it comes, enjoy the positive moments but accept that it's normal to feel angry, sad, or hopeless at times. You have been through so much and it will take time to heal, but please know you are not alone.

Sometimes when I'm sad and someone will say "don't cry" I think maybe I want to cry maybe I don't want to move on yet!

Crying is completely okay! I'm learning that even partners/husbands etc don't fully understand. We have physically grown another human and then felt the emptiness when those tiny beings were snatched away from us and anyone that hasn't actually physically been through that just cannot understand.

As I move forward, more things become clear. My OH is very vocal about how he thinks I should be thinking and feeling now and in the future. For us, ttc again is a focus and he repeatedly explains how he expects me to not freak out next time. When I mentioned counselling when/if I fall again he literally couldn't understand how I could possibly need counselling. There is such little understanding all around us but we must remember in those difficult times that there (unfortunately) are a number of us that do and that it is okay to not be okay. You are not alone.

Hello, sorry to gatecrash post. I am sorry everyone is having a hard time. I am really struggling at mo. Me and my husband was ttc and on 29/4 I was a day late so couldn't wait and did a test (negative) the next day I came on. The following Sunday I started getting bad pains groin and back took another test positive. Went to doc Tuesday and it was negative but my hpt said positive. Went for hcg test negative. The following day all hpt were negative. I had a bit of brown discharge then nothing for couple of days. Yesterday I had what looked like brown blood and some clots which as of today as turned into red blood almost like a period. I am getting little twinges every now and then but not sure if in my head. I keep thinking alsorts my anxiety has gone sky high. Doesn't help it's my brother and dads 2nd and 1st anniversary since they died. Just wondered anyone else had anything like this?
Sorry again gatecrashing just no help from dr and needed some advice or to tell me I am normal. Xx

I'm sorry you're going through such a confusing time worrying. I don't have a similar experience, but just wanted to know I'm here. I hope things return to normal for you quickly and you soon get a clear bfp.

I'm so sorry about your brother and dad. Anniversaries are difficult, and definitely add to anxiety levels. ❤️