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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Missed miscarriage reality

29 replies

Jenroxy5 · 22/03/2017 18:45

When you lose something or someone your heart breaks in two pieces a piece of them and half of you. Over the last week mines had split into three mines, my boyfriends and my unborn child's heart that stopped beating at 13 weeks. I have never felt pain like this how? Why? What?
The emotional and physical pain of bleeding uncontrollably and praying everything is okay, to look at that ultrasound screen and see a baby but laying there silently no movement nothing. Watching women and families leave with pictures of their lovely bouncing babies on that screen and getting wheeled past all these patiently waiting mums to be on ultrasounds while I'm clutching pregnancy notes on my lap that I don't need anymore. I dream everytime I fall asleep it's a big joke they checked wrong then I wake up and it's facing the reality again. Did you know? Miscarriage effects 1 in 5 women the doctor said to me as I signed paperwork to surgically remove my baby. My face is red and swollen from crying, my whole body violated from being poked and prodded by nurses, doctors you name it. And when it's all over you walk past pregnant people, people with car seats to be filled, people walking out with their newborn babies and I get nothing but a sorry try again.
Heartbreaking is an understatement knowing that the one thing you need to do as a women is carry your child to watch it grow and be the best you could be and I can't even do that.
But you're not to blame as all you can be is strong and brave as everyone says. Sometimes it's okay not to ok! If you have a child or children and you got and get to watch them grow everyday you are the luckiest person on the planet because that person (me) who lost wishes they were you, wishes they could have what you have as I didn't get the chance you got the first time. Some day in the future we hope that we will be blessed for a healthy pregnancy and healthy baby and we wish everyone in the same position as us the best of luck in their journeys to become Mummies and Daddies❤️💙 x

OP posts:
usedtorun · 19/05/2017 22:11

Oh ladies, this process is so so shit! I am so cross reading what you all have gone through coupled with my own experiences.

I've just had my second early miscarriage, plus an ectopic in December. After 3 losses in 12 months, firstly I'm gaining jewellery (memorial birth stone rings for all), but also I'm left thinking "why me....again?".

I do already have a DD who I am so grateful for, but I'm at a point where I am wondering whether we should call it quits? I'm not religious, but is there something out there telling me to stop now? @Ir77 so sorry to hear you experience and totally with you that enough is enough, I always said if I miscarried again that would be in, but now I'm here I'm not so sure....?

usedtorun · 19/05/2017 22:12

Sorry for the typos, I've had a few make me feel better / worse beers this evening!

Anastasia9895 · 23/05/2017 09:53

Today o found out I had a Mmc. I never felt anything but the moment he said it I felt myself die right along with my baby. So much time.months trying and it finally happened after tons of negatives. Yay I'm pregnant. Positive after postive. And the appoint finally comes the earliest open one and mmc. I was told it wasn't me. I am healthy. But how is that my baby was so sick my body killed It? I would have loved it literally no.matter what was wrong. Why? Why is my baby gone? Should I we even try again? We both are broken. I don't even know if I was blessed with a son or daughter how do I grieve?

IntelligentPutty · 23/05/2017 15:11

So sorry for your loss. It is so unfair.
I hope you will not lose faith.
Big hugs to you. There are really no words which can help. I was in your place 2 weeks ago. It does get easier.
X
Flowers

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