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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

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Original poster

Good things come to those who wait

26 replies

TheresaTh · 07/02/2017 03:19

Hi - if you are experiencing recurrent miscarriage I wanted to offer some hope.
My husband and I had 4 early miscarriages over the space of one year. Nothing found in tests.
We kept trying but suddenly we also could not conceive. This went on for two years.
Then we decided to try IVF and egg batching due to RM and my age but the first round was cancelled as we only got one egg!
Thinking we had reached the end of the line, we promptly fell pregnant naturally the following month and this one stuck. I am now 12 weeks and 5 days and all looks fine, good development and fetal HB.
I am a month away from my 45th birthday.
Good luck to everyone experiencing RM and infertility. It is a journey and whatever the outcome there is hope you will get through it one way or another irrespective of what happens in the end.

OP posts:

AnneLovesGilbert · 09/02/2017 22:48

Congratulations, that's such wonderful news. I wish you a peaceful healthy uneventful pregnancy and a gorgeous rainbow baby. Thank you for sharing your story and giving those of us with a similar history hope x

NicolaC17 · 14/02/2017 12:24

Thank you for this story. It gives me hope after 3 miscarriages and an ectopic. Enjoy every moment of your long awaited pregnancy.

Wombletor · 15/02/2017 20:13

Congratulations!!!

Pinkandwhite · 21/02/2017 02:05

Congratulations! Thank you so much for sharing your story. It is so good to hear stories like these.

GreyStars · 21/02/2017 02:17

Congratulations, it's really lovely to hear positive stories! I hope everything goes well for you and you enjoy every moment x don't care if it's un-mumsnetty to give X's

7 miscarriages for me with no live births so at 39, I was thinking it was unlikely to happen - stories from older women really do give me some much needed hope

I'm really happy for you

angelicjen · 21/02/2017 11:16

That's wonderful. Best of luck for the rest of your pregnancy.

TheLegendOfBeans · 21/02/2017 11:18

I love threads like this!!! Congrats xx

juni · 21/02/2017 15:21

Greystars I had my DS at 33 - we then started trying again when I was 37 - 6 miscarriages later we had DD when I was 41 - you've still got time at 39. Presume you've been checked out to try and find a reason? Recurrent MC clinic at st Mary's helped us. I'd given up and didn't want to go through it all again but that last throw of the dice did the trick!

jimijack · 21/02/2017 15:25

Me too, 7 miscarriages, gave up all hope, stopped trying. My boy was born when I was 43!!!
To say we were shocked would be an understatement

Pinkandwhite · 22/02/2017 21:08

Congratulations all those who have had babies after multiple losses! Thank you for sharing your stories. It really does help those of us who are still hoping for a rainbow baby.

Pinkandwhite · 22/02/2017 21:08

Juni, please may I ask what St Mary's found if anything and what medications you were given that made the difference?

juni · 23/02/2017 02:41

Sure, I had a uterine septum. It isn't commonly thought to cause mc but St Mary's have found many of their patients have this condition and are researching a link. I had an operation to remove it, I had a subsequent mc but went onto have DD. Looking back I think it was this that caused the horrendous bleeding I had during my pregnancies (both with my son and before I would mc) as with my DD I didn't have any hideous episodes. St Mary's also recommended taking 150mg of low dose aspirin as opposed to the widely recommended 75mg (or is it micro grams !?) as their research shows it has better results. I was also given fragmin (blood thinner) to inject during pg as I was old (!) and have arthritis.
I used to hate it when my DH would read things like this and say that loads of people have had multiple mc and gone on to conceive and we should keep going (we're not everyone, everyone's different - shut it!). But here I am adding our story, so who knows!!
Good luck everyone, it's a hard journey but there can be light at the end of that tunnel.... X

GreyStars · 23/02/2017 12:44

Thank you ladies for your positive over 39 stories, just sat and cried. I am now at the stage where I haven't been pregnant for six months an desperate to be pregnant again but also utterly terrified.

Lots of investigations, supportive unit and GP (I am exceptionally lucky in that regard) and I have been allowed to share all my findings and they agreed to try all medications suggested for NK cells as I found out I was pregnant the day of an appointment, I had number 4 that afternoon. My longest and first pregnancy I had to take prednisolone for another condition, i stopped and I had my first mc shortly after. So they thought a link.

Number five I was in a bad place and denial that it even mattered then six and seven happened the same way, strong positive test in the morning come the afternoon another mc.

Am now taking the aspirin (but I think I will up that) and low dose steroids but haven't been pregnant since June, although we think an issue with my partner who's doctor put him on a drug that we discovered has a small chance to affect me fertility so we are at the end of that being out of his system (tests for him next week)

I've been recommended Coventry and a private doctor in London (can't remember his name) but as my specialists/doctors will give everything they recommend and have run loads of tests for physical signs I wasn't sure if they would find anything else.

I haven't actually had a chance to try the other medications as the last few happened so quickly and I haven't been pregnant for six months.

It's just so heartbreaking, I've lost so much (was high up in a company) and couldn't function as it all happened within two years. Not having such a good day with it all today, POAS day and again another negative

But this has helped give me some more hope so thank you x

I've also been reading is your body baby ready, which is a good read and made me feel less alone and in someway supported, it's so unfair so many women go though this and they are just expected to accept it and think that it will happen one day. no other medical issue would be treated as something, some people just have to go through, there has to be reasons and women should not have to suffer with such little support.

MsJuniper · 25/02/2017 15:30

Thanks so much for this thread, I have had 5 pregnancies in the last 2.5 yrs, 2 x 9wk mc and 3 chem. At nearly 41 I am starting to lose hope but finally have an appt at St Mary's RMC so perhaps there will be some answers or at least something to try.

I do have a 4yr old DS who I am very grateful for but it has been such a traumatic few years.

I was thinking of going for a fertility MOT privately as at least if I know whether my egg reserves etc are ok then I know it's worth continuing.

Original poster

TheresaTh · 29/05/2017 10:35

Hi - I just wanted to give an update, I am now 28 weeks pregnant and in the final trimester. It has been a fairly uneventful pregnancy so far, and now starting to think about what we need to prepare for the birth!

I used to get annoyed when I heard 'it only takes one good egg' - but I guess that is what happened with us. That said those good eggs do seem to be in the minority at this age, and as expected my reserves were very small, in fact below average for my age. Our plan had been to keep trying and we also had signed up for an egg donor, and we would have started treatment a few months ago had this pregnancy not happened. Strange how things work! Now we are probably going to try again for a second viable pregnancy for about a year before revisiting ED. I'll be in my late 40s by then but we'd both like two if possible and science is wonderful. For now looking towards the birth, and will come back with my news then. Lots of love to everyone who is on the RM journey.

OP posts:

Starshine1 · 30/05/2017 07:30

Thank you Theresa th for sharing this and I am so pleased that things are going well for you.

I hope you other ladies that posted before have had some success stories too. X

Original poster

TheresaTh · 21/09/2017 07:26

So...here I am after 4 miscarriages sitting in my kitchen with my little 6 week old daughter.

Good things can happen!

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Hopefulinbalham · 22/09/2017 14:45

Thankyou Theresa Th for posting this threads. I am 42 and had a mc on Monday. It is absolutely heartwarming to read this post x

ferntwist · 01/10/2017 00:41

Wonderful post Theresa, thank you so very much for sharing this with everyone. It's so good to read. Congratulations on your lovely daughter.

dameednatheaverage · 03/10/2017 09:14

Thanks for sharing Theresa - this is so wonderful, massive congratulations. I have had two TFMR in the past seven months and am wondering if I can bear to try one more time (44). You have given me hope (although I know not to have too much). I hope you don't mind me asking but did you do anything 'different' - eg supplements, diet, etc? I am beating myself up as I have carried on much as before. I do have a reasonably healthy diet but I have continued drinking alcohol for example (not loads, but still). Anyway, congratulations, again!

Original poster

TheresaTh · 18/10/2017 11:14

Hi there,
I did absolutely nothing different at all. In fact I was probably quite stressed at the time - usual things of London life and work and relationship as well as infertility upsets. Drinking as usual (although I am not a heavy drinker anyway, a glass of wine with my meal type thing).
I'm now hoping it migh happen again, we'll keep trying. And I might go for ED in a year's time if we dont get lucky again, although as with anything in life I am keeping an open mind as dont know how I will feel in a year's time.
I should add also a few things which you might find helpful - my fertility test was very low number suggesting my egg reserves were less than average for my age; I was recommended to have expensive surgery running into thousands of pounds for fibroids as well as to take some hormone drugs to shrink them, which I was going to do as was advised this - in the end I got pregnant so did not do this only to find out I did not need to do anything at all - I only had one small fibroid which was not a problem. This is of course only my experience but I am terrified to this day that I was going to do all that for nothing but pain and stress and money down the drain.
My husband was taking proxeed plus as he did a test which showed his sperm which was very plentiful and fast swimming as is good was prone to breaking up, which is common with age as he is also over 40 so that may have helped us. Later from 10 weeks I started taking baby aspirin at the advice of Lesley Regan as one figure on a blood clotting test I did was a bit raised, but this was only after the embryo was already growing nicely. Before then all had stopped growing by around 7 weeks.

I hope that is helpful, I think though everyone's fertility case and story is different. I can only say what happened to us.

In the end probably absolutely nothing other than the right egg and timing worked. the only thing I can say is do not give up. The baby was conceived by one session of intercourse around the time of ovulation which that month we were not tracking, as we got a bit tired of all the planning...

OP posts:

Original poster

TheresaTh · 18/10/2017 11:25

I wanted to add that in my NCT group several of the ladies had had two miscarriages prior to conceiving their baby. It is so common, many also do not realise they are having a miscarriage as it can be like a late heavy period. I read somewhere that 70% of recurrent miscarriers eventually have a baby, so you have to keep positive and keep trying. After conception and all throughout the pregnancy I barely once heard anything about being 'too old' or a 'geriatric mum' - I was treated like anyone else. The pregnancy was trouble free.

OP posts:

Hopefulinbalham · 18/10/2017 11:38

Thankyou again Theresa. It’s really mind of you to share your story and has lifted my spirits x

Hopefulinbalham · 18/10/2017 11:38

Kind not mind!

ivywindows · 23/10/2017 13:24

Yes, thanks Theresa - I am a previous poster on here with a name-change! This is such a brilliant story, interesting that you didn't 'do' anything. I have been taking Coq10 and Pqq and loads of folic acid! Probably chucking my money away but never mind! I hope everything is going well with your gorgeous baby, and good luck for another try.

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